Category: Movie Reviews

Dreamer: Inspired by a True Story

MPAA Rated – PG
It’s 1:45 Long
A Review by:
– The Dude on the Right

Dreamer: Inspired by a True Story
Movie Stats & Links
Starring: Kurt Russell, Dakota Fanning, Kris Kristofferson, Elisabeth Shue
MPAA Rated: PG
Released By: Dreamworks SKG
Release Date: 2005
Kiddie Movie: More for the girls, but good for all.
Date Movie: If she likes a feel-good movie.
Gratuitous Sex: Nope.
Gratuitous Violence: Some angry talk, but no one’s punching each other out.
Action: Just some horse-racing.
Laughs: Some pretty good moments.
Memorable Scene: Cale in front of the Breeders’ Cup horse-choosing people.
Memorable Quote: Ben: “You work for her now.”
Directed By: John Gatins

As much as Dakota Fanning has been impressing me in movie after movie she is in, I am becoming a big fan of Snake Plissken, I mean Kurt Russell, especially with his role as Herb Brooks in “Miracle,” and now as Ben Crane in “Dreamer: Inspired by a True Story.” Let’s get to it…

“Dreamer: Inspired by a True Story” gives us an adaptation of a story where a son and dad nurse a horse back from a broken leg and get it to race in the Breeders’ Cup. From what I’ve read, and what the movie showed, that’s pretty much the only part of the story that was inspired, but that’s okay, because instead of just a movie about getting a horse back to racing shape, we get a movie about a family in disarray and how the horse gets the family to be a family again.

So, Dakota Fanning is Cale. She’s a fan of her dad, Ben, but Ben doesn’t spend any time with her, and she’s sort of tormented because they live on a horse farm without any horses. Finally going to work with Dad, she gets to see a horse, Sonya, run, and Cale likes her. She also gets to see that Dad’s boss, Palmer (David Morse), is a jerk. Sadly, during Sonya’s race, Sonya breaks a leg, and they are ready to put the horse down. Palmer again treats Ben like crap, Ben gets fired/quits, and in lieu of some of his back pay, Ben take Sonya instead.

Now taking Sonya may seem like a stupid idea to the rest of us, who normally assume a racehorse with a broken leg might as well just be put to sleep, but Ben does have a plan, and it’s a good plan, but with a bad ending.

Later in the movie, after Ben has an argument with Mom (Elisabeth Shue), overheard by Cale, Cale decides to take Sonya (whose actual name is Soñador, which means dreamer in Spanish) and run away from home, Sonya gets spooked, and everyone involved realizes Sonya might actually be able to race again, which is a good thing since she can’t get pregnant.

And so, Ben eventually gives Cale total say in how Sonya is worked, and she has some help from a couple of other horse-folk, Balon (Luis Guzman), and Manolin (Freddy Rodriquez). Sonya now only has one dream left, and that’s to get Sonya into the Breeders’ Cup, and mom makes dad let their daughter follow her dream, and it’s a good thing mom is around.

There really aren’t any surprises in this movie, but you know what, I didn’t care because it was just an enjoyable film. You feel for Cale when dad makes a mistake at Sonya’s come-back race, you understand the frustration for Ben when his original plan for Sonya falls apart, you’re happy that Palmer gets payback for being a jerk, and you feel the tension between Ben and his father, Pop (Kris Kristofferson), knowing they have a past that they just can’t get over. For all of this to work, you needed a cast of folks who could pull this off, and everyone involved in this movie was perfectly cast.

I don’t know if younger boys (most definitely not teen boys) would like the movie, especially with so much of it being centered around Cale, but most of the families that were in the theater really seemed to enjoy it. If you’ve got a young daughter, this movie is probably perfect for her, just realize that she might come out of the film wanting you to buy her a horse instead of a puppy. 4 ½ stars out of 5, you know what, screw that, it’s 5 stars out of 5, even without nudity, gratuitous violence, or swearing. And yes, I admit, it made me a little weepy at times.

That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo

MPAA Rated – R
It’s 1:17 Long
A Review by:
– The Dude on the Right

Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo
Movie Stats & Links
Starring: Rob Schneider, Eddie Griffin
MPAA Rated: R
Released By: Columbia Pictures
Release Date: 2005
Kiddie Movie: Definitely not.
Date Movie: Depends on if your date is an inhabitant of Easily Amused.
Gratuitous Sex: Mostly nudity and talk.
Gratuitous Violence: People get thrown through windows.
Action: Not really.
Laughs: If you are an inhabitant of Easily Amused.
Memorable Scene: The scene where Deuce’s “stop whales from beaching” device goes haywire.
Memorable Quote: Too many.
Directed By: Mike Bigelow

I can fully understand critics giving this movie zero stars, ½ star, or maybe 1 star. I really can. I understand this, because, yes, the movie is everything these critics have been writing or saying about it. But “Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo” is the kind of movie made not having a critic’s opinion in mind, but rather appealing to the folks of the country of Easily Amused, of which I am proclaiming myself King, because, yes, as dumb as the movie pretty much was, I couldn’t help but laugh at each of the new words and phrases that were invented to replace the word “penis.” And who can’t appreciate a pimp-boat.

Deuce Bigalow’s (Rob Schneider) last couple of years haven’t been going well. First he loses his wife with one leg to a turtle feeding mishap where the lettuce was tainted with meat, inviting the sharks to come along, that once they spit out the lettuce decided Kate would make a better meal. Then his development of a device to stop whales from beaching kinda goes haywire. Now Bruce is a wanted man and thank goodness for Bruce that his old buddy T.J. (Eddie Griffin) is having some issues in Amsterdam and invites Bruce to pay him a visit.

It seems that gigolos are having a bit of a problem in Amsterdam, namely they are being killed off, and T.J. is worried as business starts to dry up. When T.J. is framed for one of the murders, it’s now up to Deuce to go under-cover, meeting up, again, with a variety of freaky women (one has a penis for a nose, watch out for her sneeze, another who has more of a blow-hole rather than a tracheotomy, watch out for hiccups, and another has giant ears, so of course there is no better way to get a man to stop checking out her ears if she were to get a boob job), and once again, rather than just being the man-whore that he is, he makes the women feel better about themselves. As Deuce’s investigation gets deeper and deeper, of course there is also a love interest that develops for Deuce, and yes, in the end, Deuce saves the gigolos from being blown up, and all is back to normal in the man-whore world.

Like I said, as King of Easily Amused, I knew what to expect going into this film, and got exactly that, and a little bit more thanks to the likes of Norm Macdonald as a crotchety old man-whore. There is also an extension of the vocabulary for the word “penis,” and I’m sure I missed some, but we find “Lock Ness Monster,” “schlong,” “man-gina,” “he-pussy,” “magic shenis,” “snatch pole,” and “she cock” to name a few. We are also introduced to some new terminology for kinky sex acts, expanding on the “Dirty Sanchez” to give us things like the “Filthy Ramirez,” “Cambodian Creamsicle,” “Turkish Sno-Cone,” “Chili Rainbow,” and the scarily portrayed “Portuguese Breakfast.”

Look, the boys are in Amsterdam, so you definitely get some drug use, some nudity, and some kinky sex. You also get exactly what you will expect from this movie, so for those critics who gave it zero stars, like I said, I understand your stance, but for me, it’s 3 ½ stars out of 5 for being exactly what it was made out to be: humor for us in the land of Easily Amused. Stupid. Yea, so what, but I still enjoyed it and that’s why I’m King.

That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo

MPAA Rated – R
It’s 1:28 Long
A Review by:
– The Dude on the Right

Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo
Movie Stats & Links
Starring: Rob Schneider, Arija Bareikis
MPAA Rated: R
Released By: Touchstone Pictures
Release Date: 1999
Kiddie Movie: Lots of bad language and adult jokes. Too young and they’ll ask too many questions.
Date Movie: It’s more a dude movie, but she might like it if she has a warped sense of humor.
Gratuitous Sex: Nothing gratuitous.
Gratuitous Violence: Some things breaking.
Action: Nah.
Laughs: It’s better on video.
Memorable Scene: None.
Memorable Quote: None.
Directed By: Sid Ganis, Barry Bernardi

I really didn’t like “Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo” when it was in the theaters. Maybe I was just in a bad mood, but I didn’t find it funny, wondered why it was made, and just didn’t like it. Back then I gave it 1 star. But then I got the DVD and decided that this movie really isn’t that bad.

Rob Schneider plays Deuce Bigalow. He’s a fish tank cleaner who gets most of his enjoyment by making the girl in the fish store dip her breasts in the snail tank so he can see her boobs. He gives his fish bottled water and drinks rusty pipe water, and he ends up taking care of a cool, gigolo’s fish while the gigolo is out of the country. He accidentally trashes the place and needs to come up with a ton of cash or face the wrath of Antoine, the cool gigolo, and with the help of T.J., a man pimp, becomes a gigolo, or rather, a man whore, himself. But Deuce doesn’t score the hot chicks, nope, T.J. sets Deuce up with the “freaks” where Deuce charms the ladies with good verbal skills rather than being good in the sack.

Alright, to be a little more fair the movie does go deeper than that, sort of preaching the message that everyone is special in their own way, and maybe because I was in a better mood, maybe being a little bit older, or maybe being at home where I don’t try to engross myself in a movie most of the time, but this time I enjoyed “Deuce Bigalow..”. The scenes that gave me chuckles in the theater gave me chuckles again, like the narcoleptic girl who tied her hair to the light so she wouldn’t drown in her soup when she fell asleep, but also felt a little sorry for Deuce, especially as his relationship with Kate fell apart.

It’s an adult rental but remember to bring out the child in you when you watch it. If you do as I say it’s 3 stars out of 5. If you’re looking for an intelligent comedy, “Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo” isn’t it, but if your looking for stupid fun, go ahead and rent it!

That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

The Help

MPAA Rated – PG-13
It’s 2:18 Long
A Review by:
– The Dude on the Right

The Help
Movie Stats & Links
Starring: Emma Stone, Bryce Dallas Howard, Viola Davis, Octavia Spencer
MPAA Rated: PG-13
Released By: Dreamworks / Walt Disney Studio
Release Date: December 6, 2011
Kiddie Movie: It’s pretty adult, especially some of the racial hatred.
Date Movie: It’s a dudette flick that I think dudes will secretely like.
Gratuitous Sex: Nah.
Gratuitous Violence: You don’t see it much, but you know it’s happening.
Action: Nah.
Laughs: There are a lot of chuckles.
Memorable Scene: The reveal of the pie given to Hilly.
Memorable Quote: Nothing stood out.
Directed By: Tate Taylor
Cool things about the Blu-ray: It’s not overblown with special features, just a nice look at real mades of Mississippi, and a a good look at how the film ended up being made.

Okay, I admit it, as I guy I had absolutely no desire to see “The Help” when it was in the theater, and even probably made fun of it during a podcast or two.  At the time I figured I was lucky to get out of seeing it as my schedule just didn’t fit going to see it with my wife, but then I saw the notice that it was coming out on Blu-ray, and knowing my wife would probably like to see it, I sucked up my man-card and got a copy to review.  Wouldn’t you know it, I really liked the movie, and as “womanly” as the movie might seem, it tells a fabulous story of a time when things were truly changing.

Enough reflecting.  “The Help” is a movie about the maids in Jackson, Mississippi, at a time in the 1960’s when racial issues were very much at the forefront of life, and the transition from treating these strong women like property to treating them like people finally started to occur.  The movie is based on the novel by Kathryn Socket, about a writer, Eugenia “Skeeter” Phelan (Emma Stone), who was perturbed by how the white women of the south were treating the help, especially Hilly (Bryce Dallas Howard), who was fully of the sort that blacks should be separated from whites, so much so that she wanted a law that households have a separate bathroom for the blacks, or something crazy like that.  Skeeter decides that the stories of the maids needed to be told, only it was illegal to publically write the story, so she devises a plan to write a novel based on anonymous accounts of the maids she would interview.  In the meantime, throughout the movie, we are immersed into the lives of the various women, from the racist white women who seem to have blinders on as to the child raising ability of their maids, to the maids themselves, as they have to deal with the uppity employers, abusive husbands, and false arrests based on only a complaint by a white woman to the police.

But at the core of the movie is really how strong all of the maids tended to be, and how, even though they shouldn’t be treated differently, understood it happens, and work through it.  Nowhere does this story come more to light than with the life of Minny Jackson (Octavia Spencer), who originally worked for Hilly, but when fired devised a plan to get back at Hilly, in a way that turns out to help maintain keep Hilly at bay when the book is released, and after being fired by Hilly, finds herself working for the societal outcast, Celia (Jessica Chastain), where they both end up understanding each other even though from different sides of the social spectrum.

There are parts of the movie that just seem downright a bummer, as it recalls how blacks were treated at the time, and how far we still, as a society have yet to go, but the bestness of the movie is how it shows that sometimes it isn’t a smart thing to mess with a smart woman, even if that woman is supposed to be “less” than you.

The acting in the movie is great, even though the movie is over two hours it flows nicely, and even as a guy, I really liked “The Help.”  So go ahead and get the movie, cheer on woman who deserve their triumph when the book is released during the film, and grin when you discover how Minny gets back at Hilly.

It’s 4 ½ stars out of 5 for “The Help.”

And as far as the Blu-ray is concerned, they don’t go crazy with the extras, but they are a nice little addition to the movie.  For a change there is actually a “deleted scenes” feature that has scenes I thought would still fit nicely in the movie, the “In Their Own Words: A Tribute to the Maids of Mississippi” feature is a well-done, not overblown “interview” with real maids of Mississippi,  and the “Making of…” feature didn’t go crazy with making it stuff, just giving nice, little blurbs of how some of the locations came to be, and how the movie ended up in the hands of little known Director, Tate Taylor, who did a great job with the film.

Not too crazy on the extras, which is nice, and a great movie, makes “The Help” a high recommendation from me.

That’s it for this one!  I’m The Dude on the Right!!  L8R!!!

West Side Story

MPAA Rated – Unrated
It’s 2:33 Long
A Review by:
– The Dude on the Right

West Side Story
Movie Stats & Links
Starring: Natalie Wood, Richard Beymer, Rita Moreno, George Chakiris
MPAA Rated: Unrated
Released By: Twentieth Century Home Entertainment
Release Date: November 15, 2011
Kiddie Movie: There are a few killings, but and I doubt little boys would like it.
Date Movie: Go ahead, snuggle with your honey on the couch and hum along.
Gratuitous Sex: Nah.
Gratuitous Violence: Some stabbings and a shooting.
Action: There is chasing, but they’re dancing and prancing at the same time.
Laughs: A chuckle or two.
Memorable Scene: Every time the dude with the tight pants that accented his package was on the screen.
Memorable Quote: Mostly just the songs.
Directed By: Jerome Robbins

I was negative-six years old when “West Side Story” originally hit the theater, and believe it or not, in those fifty years, I have never seen the movie nor a stage representation of the story.  I do find this somewhat surprising as I was a theaterish kind of guy in high school, and my mom loved a good musical, but alas, no “West Side Story” for me.  That’s not to say I wasn’t familiar with the music, although I sometimes got things confused with “The Sound of Music” (yes, I’ll admit, I thought “Maria” was from The Sound of Music), but come on, who doesn’t sometimes hum the tune “America”?  Feeling I was missing something in my life, and knowing the fact that my wife was a big fan of the movie, when the opportunity came to review “West Side Story,” being released in a 50th Anniversary Edition on Blu-ray, I felt it my duty.  And I must say, even with the dancing and prancing, I really liked it.

Let’s get to it…

“West Side Story” bases itself off of the classic Shakespeare concept of “Romeo & Juliet,” only this time lets’ make our competing factions be two rival street gangs in New York City, the Sharks and the Jets, and it’s set back in the late 50’s/early 60’s, so they aren’t like gangs we are really used to, well, almost.  The Jets are pretty much the European immigrants, and the Sharks are the Puerto Rican immigrants looking to invade the turf of the Jets.  Alas, Tony (Richard Beymer) is trying to grow up, get his life straight, and used to be the leader of the Jets.  Maria (Natalie Wood) is the sister of the leader of the Sharks.  As the Jets and Sharks plot their rumble, low and behold Tony and Maria fall in love, and yes, do their best to keep their love a secret.

But things are getting serious in rumble land, with the fighting escalating from talk of dancing and prancing (Okay, I kid, it’s a musical and the fighting is sort of ballet-ish), to knife wielding, and when things go horribly wrong with the knife fighting, well, it’s time for someone to get a gun.

People die, someone gets shot, it’s like “Romeo and Juliet” so it’s not really a happy ending, but even though set 50 years ago, it’s a great love story, and even though you know someone’s going to end up dead, you can’t help but hope that somehow are two lovebirds would be able to get away and live a full life in wedded bliss.

Yes, the movie is a musical, and it is from 50 years ago so it does look dated, and sure, the outfits might look kind of funny for us now (Someone I know really well couldn’t help but notice the bulge in one of the guy’s pants, and therefore, for the rest of the night, it kept being pointed out), but as a film it still looks great, from an era when great camera work had to take the place of green screens and CGI.  And yes, the acting is great, at least on some fronts (Yup, Natalie Wood and Richard Beymer are great), although sometimes it drifts into over-acting mode as was prevalent at the time.

And yes, lastly, there is the music, where as I watched the movie, I kept finding myself saying “Hey, I know that song.”  Even though 50 years old, it’s music that truly stands the test of time.

So, as  movie, it’s 5 stars out of 5 for “West Side Story.”  Yup, I liked it, even with the dancing and prancing.

Now, as far as the 50th Anniversary Edition on Blu-ray, let me say it’s pretty fantastic, especially for the “West Side Story” fan.  The movie itself looks great, as it should, but there is a 4-Disc set that includes a CD and collectable memorabilia, and for the basic 3-Disc set you get some pretty sweet extras as well. Do you want to get the inside scoop about how shots were made – you get that and more during a very detailed explanation of how the movie was made, the challenges the actors had, and the changes that were made in song ideas.  There is also another segment of memories of West Side Story, and if you are a movie buff, a look at the storyboard progression of the film.  You can also watch the movie in “Pow! The Dances of West Side Story” mode, and if you’re a dance buff it’s great because it will help explain how the dance sequences came to light.  And don’t forget the music, as Stephen Sondheim the lyricist give a commentary for all of the great songs.

All in all, in the world of Blu-ray special editions, they did “West Side Story” right, as it should be for a movie that is a classic.

That’s it for this one!  I’m The Dude on the Right!!  L8R!!!

The River Why

MPAA Rated – PG-13
It’s 1:44 Long
A Review by:
– The Dude on the Right

The River Why
Movie Stats & Links
Starring: Zach Gilford, William Hurt, Amber Heard, Kathleen Quinlan
MPAA Rated: PG-13
Released By: Image Entertainment
Release Date: Novermber 8, 2011
Kiddie Movie: They’ll probably get bored. It’s kind of lovey-dovey.
Date Movie: As long as you are both prepared for a lot of slowness.
Gratuitous Sex: It’s all PG-13, just some partial stuff.
Gratuitous Violence: Just some arguing mostly.
Action: Nah.
Laughs: Ehh.
Memorable Scene: I did like the scene where Gus was “tiring” the big fish.
Memorable Quote: Nah.
Directed By: Matthew Leutwyler
Cool Stuff About the Blu-ray? Nothing really, just some interviews with the cast and crew.

Gus’ dad (William Hurt) and mom (Kathleen Quinlan) like to fish.  And I’m not talking about a leisurely trip in a boat to kill an afternoon, nope, they are career fisherpeople, with fly-fishing being their forte, and competition amongst each other in their life. Gus, though, is now 20 years old, wants to live his own life (which is actually just fishing, but on his terms), and after a blowout at home he moves out, much to the sadness of his parents.  But young men must sometimes fly the nest to find themselves, and Gus finds himself living in a secluded cabin, by a river, and fly-fishing.  Such is “The River Why.”

So, you would think things would be simple out in the middle of nowhere, wouldn’t you?  Nope.  Turns out living in the middle of nowhere brings out some odd characters, and a girl, Eddy (Amber Heard), whom Gus ends up falling for.  Turns out she likes to fish, too.  Go figure.

So where am I going with this review?  Hmm?  I guess the easiest thing I can say is that after watching “The River Why” it turns out it isn’t easy to make an entertaining movie centered around both fly-fishing and finding one’s self, but “The River Why” does give it a good try, and looks really good doing it.  The thing with the movie, for me, was that as beautiful as it looked, and as great as many of the fishing scenes were shot, there wasn’t a lot of substance to the film, mostly a lot of “Ooh, isn’t this scenery beautiful.  Oh, wait, lets try to get a little quirky with this new character who might try to help instill a life lesson to young Gus.”  In a weird way the movie reminded me of the movie “Big Fish,” which like this movie, about half-way through the film, I just didn’t care that much about anymore.  I really wanted to like “The River Why” more than I did, but it just seemed to drag too often, and not in a good way.

It is a nice, feel-good movie about a young man trying to find himself, and to do so he has to get out of the grips of his parents, and the story with Eddy is nice enough, but wow, I just kept waiting for some kind of payoff, and even with the ending, it just didn’t get there quick enough.  Sadly it’s 2 stars out of 5.

Blu-ray wise, not too much is extra, which is fine, just some interviews with the cast, so get the movie for the story.

That’s it for this one!  I’m The Dude on the Right!!  L8R!!!

Blue Velvet

MPAA Rated – R
It’s 2:00 Long
A Review by:
– The Dude on the Right

Blue Velvet
Movie Stats & Links
Starring: Kyle MacLachlan, Dennis Hopper, Laura Dern, Isabella Rosselllini
MPAA Rated: R
Released By: Twentieth Century Fox Home Entertainment
Release Date: November 8, 2011
Kiddie Movie: For the love of all things great and small, put them to bed before popping in the Blu-ray.
Date Movie: Only if she likes twistedness.
Gratuitous Sex: Dennis Hopper is a sadist, and Isabella Rossellini gets naked. It’s gratuitous and disturbing.
Gratuitous Violence: Um, duh.
Action: No real action.
Laughs: Nope.
Memorable Scene: Every time you see Dennis Hopper take a hit of Amyl nitrate you know bad things are coming.
Memorable Quote: Too many sick quotes from Dennis Hopper’s Frank.
Directed By: David Lynch
Cool Things About the Blu-ray?: You get tons of bonus/lost footage, and a great documentary. And, a few outtakes.

“Blue Velvet” attempts to answer the proverbial question: “What would you do if you found a human ear in a field?”  Okay, it doesn’t really try to answer that question, but it is the starting point for one of the most twisted, entertaining, and masterpieces of movie-making ever.

It’s been probably 20+ years since I’ve seen “Blue Velvet” and I have to say that I forgot how twisted of a character Frank Booth (Dennis Hopper) is.  It was only after seeing that initial scene of young Jeffrey being trapped in Dorothy’s room and Frank, inhaling Amyl nitrate, while terrorizing Dorothy, that it started to come rushing back to me.

The story basically goes like this:  It’s the smallish town of Lumberton, and Jeffrey (Kyle MacLachlan) comes across a human ear in a field.  Okay, sure, this is after his dad ends up in the hospital, but who’s really keeping track? Anyway, what to do?  Well, he takes it to the police.  It is there he is put in the world of Detective Williams and his lovely daughter, Sandy (Laura Dern).  As Jeffrey begins his own investigation into the ear, thanks to some help from Sandy, he finds himself breaking into the apartment of Dorothy (Isabella Rossellini), a messed-up, nightclub singer, and it is there that the disturbingness of Frank is truly witnessed.  Now Jeffrey is getting wrapped into twisted feelings and trying to help Dorothy, he wants to get to the truth around Frank, and suddenly we find Jeffrey being pretty much kidnapped by Frank on a wild night on the town in Lumberton.  Frank is a maniacal drug/prostitute guy, and Jeffrey is doing his darndest to put all of the pieces together, including corrupt policemen and conflicting feelings for both Sandy and Dorothy, to put Frank away and get him away from Dorothy.  All of the mystery, intrigue, and twistedness of Frank continues until the fantastic end.

Yup, I forgot how twisted the movie is, as well as how much I liked it, and if you want the best of the best of Dennis Hopper being a crazy man, forget that “Speed” movie grabage, in “Blue Velvet” he takes twisted to an entirely different level.

So, all of the forgetting aside, I can’t help but give “Blue Velvet” 4 ½ stars out of 5.  It holds up 25 years later.

As far as the movie on Blu-ray, let me simply say this – The movie looks fantastic.  The press release says David Lynch supervised the transfer and color correction, and it shows as this is one movie where the color contrasts just pop.  And as far as the other things on Blu-ray, for all of you uber “Blue Velvet” fans, it’s got nearly an hour of lost footage, some goofy outtakes, and the part I found most fascinating, the “Mysteries of Love Documentary” giving tons of insight into how this movie came to be, including why there was an ear in the field.

A great, twisted movie, it looks great on Blu-ray, and for a change it’s a release that has great, extra content without going overboard.  Ah, screw it – 5 stars out of 5!

That’s it for this one!  I’m The Dude on the Right!!  L8R!!!

Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides

MPAA Rated – PG-13
It’s 2:16 Long
A Review by:
– The Dude on the Right

Pirates of the Caribbean:
On Stranger Tides
Movie Stats & Links
Starring: Johnny Depp, Penelope Cruz, Geoffrey Rush, Keith Richards
MPAA Rated: PG-13
Released By: The Walt Disney Studios
Release Date: October 18, 2011
Kiddie Movie: Not too young, the mermaids are mean.
Date Movie: Only if she is an uber-fan.
Gratuitous Sex: Lots of boobs almost popping out of tops is about it.
Gratuitous Violence: Lots of it – in pirate sstyle.
Action: There’s a lot of chasing going on.
Laughs: Not really, except for Jack Sparrow’s goofiness.
Memorable Scene: The mean mermaids.
Memorable Quote: Nothing really.
Directed By: Rob Marshall
Produced By: Jerry Bruckheimer
Cool things about the Blu-ray: Unless you pop for the 5-disc set, which includes tons of extras, the only coolness for the basic version is it looks cool, and the Disney Second Screen . The 5-disc includes a 3D and a lot more.

I’ve generally liked most of the “Pirates of the Caribbean” movies, what with Jack Sparrow bouncing around and acting goofy, so I was partly anticipating watching the “On Stranger Tides” version, but I was a little worried that the story might have been getting old.  Sadly, for me, it has.

Let’s start with the story…

Back is Johnny Depp as Jack Sparrow, hoping to avoid jail time by escaping as only Jack Sparrow can.  Alas, things are mysterious on the high seas again, with this time the quest being the proverbial Fountain of Youth.  Yup, there’s a map, evil pirates, and let’s throw in Penelope Cruz as Angelica in the mix for good measure, and you pretty much get 2+ hours of the search for said Fountain.

Sure, there are dastardly deeds going on, and with any good pirate quest there are twists and turns, but other than Jack Sparrow searching for the Fountain of Youth, you don’t need to know too much more about this movie, especially since, after about 5 minutes, it turns into an action-fest where the story takes a back seat to the bombastic action on the screen, make that the storage area behind the back seat, to the action. Yup, there are people chasing, people being chased, fights between pirate ship crews, fights between, well, you know what, it doesn’t matter, because for me it got boring, tired, and old really fast.

Yup, Jack Sparrow clumsily waddles around, somehow he gets out of jam after jam, and maybe Angelica and Jack have a thing for each other, but this movie was really missing something, and I think that relates to the original movie with Keira Knightley and Orlando Bloom being a great side story to that of Jack Sparrow’s antics.

Look, the movie will look great on your big screen, and will sound great through your audio system, but this one is all about the action and not about any story.  And if you think you might want keep the kids awake for the ride, this is a hard PG-13 in my opinion, with some of the scariest mermaids I’ve ever seen (forget Little Mermaid love for this one), and the kiddies might end up with some nightmares and hate Ariel for life.

In the end it’s 1 ½ stars for “Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides.” Oddly enough I really wanted more of a story.

Get the Blu-ray for the action, and also, don’t worry too much about the extras.  There is a blooper reel that is pretty lame in blooper reel standards, and the Blu-ray does have the Disney Second Screen feature which is kind of neat if you are really interested in how the movie is made, and, oh yea, I suppose maybe better for the kiddies than the actual movie is the LEGO Animated Shorts, but unless you go balls out for the 5-Disc Combo pack complete with 3D, you’re getting the Blu-ray to be blasted onto your back wall with action.

That’s it for this one!  I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

X-Men: First Class

MPAA Rated – PG-13
It’s 2:12 Long
A Review by:
– The Dude on the Right

 

X-Men: First Class
Movie Stats & Links
Starring: James McAvoy, Michael Fassbender, Kevin Bacon, Rose Byrne, Jennifer Lawrence, January Jones
MPAA Rated: PG-13
Released By: Twentieth Century Fox Home Entertainment
Release Date: 2011
Kiddie Movie: I’d send them to bed. It can get a little intense.
Date Movie: If she generally likes comic book movies.
Gratuitous Sex: Hinted at, but nothing gratuitous, although Mystique is painted naked.
Gratuitous Violence: It get’s pretty brutal, though not bloody.
Action: Lots of action going on.
Laughs: A couple of good chuckles.
Memorable Scene: Magneto lifting a submarine.
Memorable Quote: I don’t want to ruin it, but it’s during a cameo.
Directed By: Matthew Vaughn

I’ve generally been a fan of the X-Men series of movies and thought they’ve done a good job keeping the stories moving along, but there was a hint of trepidation when I heard they were making a “prequel” kind of film, namely “X-Men: First Class.” I mean, how can you have an X-Men movie without Jean-Luc, I mean, Patrick Stewart, but there it was coming to my local gigaplex, and somehow I couldn’t find the time to make the theater.  After watching the Blu-ray, I really wish I had made the time.

Let’s get to the movie.

“X-Men: First Class” starts at the beginning.  Well, I’m not sure about the beginning, but we get introduced to younger Erik Lehnsherr, who would eventually become Magneto, at a Nazi Concentration camp, and the twisted Dr. Klaus Schmidt/Sebastian Shaw (An outstanding Kevin Bacon in a bad guy role).  It is there that young Erik’s psyche begins to take shape, his distrust for government folks, and desire to put humans in their place.  We are also introduced to a younger Charles Xavier, learning of his abilities and developing his first mutant relationship, with a young Raven who would become Mystique.

We then movie time-travel to the early 1960’s and find that Sebastian Shaw is building his own mutant army, hell-bent on pretty much destroying the human race in favor of mutants.  How? By manipulating the Russians and Americans into a nuclear war, of course.  Meanwhile, Erik (Michael Fassbender) is hot on Sebastian’s tail, seeking revenge for some concentration camp atrocities, and Charles (James McAvoy) is getting a reputation for his research into evolution and the possibility of mutants, as well as being a ladies man. Enter Moira (Rose Byrne). She’s with the feds, investigating potential problems with government folks and nuclear war.

Eventually the paths of everyone meet, Charles and Erik get recruited by Moira to stop Sebastian, and the personalities and destinies of Charles and Erik unfold with Charles wanting to do good, but Erik, although becoming friends with Charles, seeks his path of getting his revenge and building his army for a war against the humans.  In the meantime we are introduced to a group of mutants who join the ranks, some bad mutants affiliated with Sebastian who, of course, split to Magneto’s side in the end, and just general mutant showing-offedness in finally stopping Sebastian from his dastardly deed.

Here’s the thing with “X-Men: First Class”… I’m almost happy it ended up as a prequel rather than the first in the series.  It was way enjoyable watching the characters grow, understanding now how their personalities developed, seeing how Mystique ended up on Magneto’s side, and as it occurred to me at the end of the movie, after not realizing Charles was walking the entire time, it was good to see how Charles ended up in a wheelchair.  A very fine X-Men movie, indeed!

Now, as to why I was disappointed in not seeing this movie in the theater? Simply because this is a movie with blow-away effects and some beautiful scenery, that lends itself to your being engrossed in it, in a theater, with the sound blasting around you, and watching Magneto “lift” a submarine out of the water probably played out tons better in super-giant size. Sure, your home theater can do a decent job, but for the best effect this was a movie that should have been seen on the real, big screen.

So, for a great film about the beginnings of the X-Men, and I’ll be honest, I don’t know if it was generally true to the comics, but I don’t really care because it did work for me, I’m giving “X-Men: First Class” 4 ½ stars out of 5.  There were a couple of hiccup spots, maybe a little too much “here’s how this came about” stuff, but all in all a super-solid movie to make you appreciate your X-Men favorites even more.

Now, as far as the Blu-ray is concerned, it’s loaded with extras.  “Children of the Atom” gives you pretty much everything about how the movie was made, in various parts so if you don’t care about the make-up and just care about the effects, sure you can watch only that, but if you want to really understand how “X-Men: First Class” was made, from beginning to end, grab a bucket of popcorn and a soda and enjoy.  The “Cerebro: Mutant Tracker” is kind of cool, especially if you are looking for refreshers on all of the mutants, or quick summaries of who they are, as you select mutants as they fly by on the screen and get video clips from the movies they were in, and a nice summary chart.  The deleted and extended scenes are nice, but I’m glad they were left on the cutting room floor, and you can also watch the movie in “X Marks the Spot Viewing Mode,” sort of an extra blown commentary track that gives behind the scene scenes as the movie plays out.

All in all a fabulous Blu-ray – I just wish I had a full-blown screening room to watch it in!

That’s it for this one!  I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

Lourdes

MPAA Rated – Unrated
It’s 1:36 Long
A Review by:
– The Dude on the Right

Lourdes
Movie Stats & Links
Starring: Sylvie Testud
MPAA Rated: Unrated
Released By: Palisades Tartan
Release Date: 2010
Kiddie Movie: Only if they are advanced readers and want to be bored.
Date Movie: My BFF liked it, but expected something different.
Gratuitous Sex: Some hints of talk is about all.
Gratuitous Violence: Nah.
Action: Nah.
Laughs: A chuckle or two.
Memorable Scene: I can’t give it away – it would ruin the movie, but I had two of them.
Memorable Quote: Something in French.
Directed By: Jessica Hausner

Well that was totally different than I expected.  I’m talking about the movie “Lourdes,” and after I got through the annoyance of it being a French film and realizing that I would have to “read” the movie, and then realizing it wasn’t going to be exactly what I imagined a movie about Lourdes would be, suddenly, after watching the limited extras on the Blu-ray, namely the interview with the director, it all made perfect sense.  I will try not to give too much away about the movie during this review so that maybe you can discover its goodness for yourself, but let’s see how I do…

So there it is, on my list of Blu-rays to review, “Lourdes,” and I’ll be honest in saying that when I got the publicity sheet for the movie, well, I really didn’t read it other than a quick “One woman’s journey to Lourdes,” or something like that.  So, yup, I was instantly of the “Well, here we go, a nice, tightly-wrapped movie about some woman going to Lourdes and wanting to walk again, or something like that.  Maybe in a twist she gives up the miracle for someone else.  Ah, in any case it will probably be a feel-good film.” So I snuggled on the couch with my BFF, realized I would be a little annoyed because, yup, it’s English subtitled and therefore I couldn’t really multitask while watching if it was boring, and hunkered down for the evening.

As the movie starts we are introduced to Christine, (Sylvie Testud), and yes, she’s in a wheelchair so I’m instantly of the “She’s going to be cured!” attitude. It’s kind of a typical “group excursion” to Lourdes, but as we continue along, what it turned out to be, rather than a “Glory be to Lourdes, it heals people!,” this is a movie about people.  There isn’t anything flashy, anything grandiose, just a nice character study of the various types of people who might be visiting Lourdes, and those around the shrine.  There is the staff, some of whom have been there for years, understanding its importance to people, yet still sort of going through the motions of things like “Today we are going to go to the baths, so line up nicely and wait your turn,” to the volunteers who are there maybe to feel better about themselves, but maybe also just to hook up with the other staff members, and the priests, who do their best to explain the reasoning why some people are healed.  Then there are the people of the vacation/excursion group.  As you would expect, there are a lot of people with a variety of ills, being in wheelchairs or just having non-descript reasons for their journey.  Christine, as it turns out, is there maybe with a little wonder about the place, but as it’s also a group excursion spot, it’s also a vacation she can go on where the staff will help take care of her, similar to a trip she took to Rome.

So the days go on, there are trips to the baths, trips along the paths, prayer meetings, and as Christine is being pushed around Lourdes, we get to meet the people a little bit more, of which my favorite are, whom I call, the two biddies – there more to gossip than to pray, and reminding me of many an aunt that I have come across.

And I think I will stop my story synopsis at this point.  Why? Anything else gives too much away, too much for you to find on your own, too much for you to think about.  Is there a miracle? Yes. Sort of. Maybe.  Will the movie make you sad? Yes. Sort of. Maybe.  Will the movie make you happy? Yes. Sort of. Maybe. And in the end, after I watched the special feature on the Blu-ray, I really got it.

Yup, even though I had to “read” the movie, and even though it took watching the special feature on the Blu-ray to fully get it, I’ve got to give “Lourdes” 4 stars out of 5.  It’s probably not what you might think it’s going to be, I know it wasn’t what I thought what it would be, but when all was said and done, upon further reflection, I’m sticking with the 4 stars.  It turned out to be a realistic movie rather than a preaching movie, and I liked that.

As far as extras on the Blu-ray, I’d say they aren’t really worth it, as most of them are trailers, but the interview with the Director, Jessica Hausner, is priceless, especially in fully understanding the end results of the movie.

That’s it for this one!  I’m The Dude on the Right!!  L8R!!!