MPAA Rated – PG-13
It’s 2:16 Long
A Review by:
– The Dude on the Right
|Pirates of the Caribbean:
On Stranger Tides
Movie Stats & Links
|Starring:||Johnny Depp, Penelope Cruz, Geoffrey Rush, Keith Richards|
|Released By:||The Walt Disney Studios|
|Release Date:||October 18, 2011|
|Kiddie Movie:||Not too young, the mermaids are mean.|
|Date Movie:||Only if she is an uber-fan.|
|Gratuitous Sex:||Lots of boobs almost popping out of tops is about it.|
|Gratuitous Violence:||Lots of it – in pirate sstyle.|
|Action:||There’s a lot of chasing going on.|
|Laughs:||Not really, except for Jack Sparrow’s goofiness.|
|Memorable Scene:||The mean mermaids.|
|Memorable Quote:||Nothing really.|
|Directed By:||Rob Marshall|
|Produced By:||Jerry Bruckheimer|
|Cool things about the Blu-ray:||Unless you pop for the 5-disc set, which includes tons of extras, the only coolness for the basic version is it looks cool, and the Disney Second Screen . The 5-disc includes a 3D and a lot more.|
I’ve generally liked most of the “Pirates of the Caribbean” movies, what with Jack Sparrow bouncing around and acting goofy, so I was partly anticipating watching the “On Stranger Tides” version, but I was a little worried that the story might have been getting old. Sadly, for me, it has.
Let’s start with the story…
Back is Johnny Depp as Jack Sparrow, hoping to avoid jail time by escaping as only Jack Sparrow can. Alas, things are mysterious on the high seas again, with this time the quest being the proverbial Fountain of Youth. Yup, there’s a map, evil pirates, and let’s throw in Penelope Cruz as Angelica in the mix for good measure, and you pretty much get 2+ hours of the search for said Fountain.
Sure, there are dastardly deeds going on, and with any good pirate quest there are twists and turns, but other than Jack Sparrow searching for the Fountain of Youth, you don’t need to know too much more about this movie, especially since, after about 5 minutes, it turns into an action-fest where the story takes a back seat to the bombastic action on the screen, make that the storage area behind the back seat, to the action. Yup, there are people chasing, people being chased, fights between pirate ship crews, fights between, well, you know what, it doesn’t matter, because for me it got boring, tired, and old really fast.
Yup, Jack Sparrow clumsily waddles around, somehow he gets out of jam after jam, and maybe Angelica and Jack have a thing for each other, but this movie was really missing something, and I think that relates to the original movie with Keira Knightley and Orlando Bloom being a great side story to that of Jack Sparrow’s antics.
Look, the movie will look great on your big screen, and will sound great through your audio system, but this one is all about the action and not about any story. And if you think you might want keep the kids awake for the ride, this is a hard PG-13 in my opinion, with some of the scariest mermaids I’ve ever seen (forget Little Mermaid love for this one), and the kiddies might end up with some nightmares and hate Ariel for life.
In the end it’s 1 ½ stars for “Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides.” Oddly enough I really wanted more of a story.
Get the Blu-ray for the action, and also, don’t worry too much about the extras. There is a blooper reel that is pretty lame in blooper reel standards, and the Blu-ray does have the Disney Second Screen feature which is kind of neat if you are really interested in how the movie is made, and, oh yea, I suppose maybe better for the kiddies than the actual movie is the LEGO Animated Shorts, but unless you go balls out for the 5-Disc Combo pack complete with 3D, you’re getting the Blu-ray to be blasted onto your back wall with action.
That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!