Category: Movie Reviews

Prom

MPAA Rated – PG
It’s 1:44 Long
A Review by:
– The Dude on the Right

Prom
Movie Stats & Links
Starring: Aimee Teegarden, Thomas McDonell
MPAA Rated: PG
Released By: Walt Disney Studios Home Entertainment
Kiddie Movie: Tween girls is probably best.
Date Movie: Only if she’s the mom.
Gratuitous Sex: Just some kissing. It’s Disney clean.
Gratuitous Violence: A small fight.
Action: Nah.
Laughs: If you’re a tween girl, maybe.
Memorable Scene: Nothing really.
Memorable Quote: Nothing really.
Directed By: Joe Nussbaum

I know it’s a Disney movie, and I know it’s not really made for the likes of me, a 40-something year old reviewer, but please, Disney, you are better than this movie.  I mean, it’s like they took the cookie-cutter, mostly perfect world of Hannah Montana, changed characters, and decided to make a movie about prom.  Yup, the movie is “Prom,” I don’t think there is any school in the world that has a prom like this, and I suppose if you want to shield your pre-teen about high school and give them the “perfect world” version, Disney did its job.  Let’s get to the story…

It’s the end of high school in Perfectia, or at least some high school, and Nova (Aimee Teegarden) is the go-getter, cute girl who dreams of the perfect prom and is in the midst of planning it.  She is hoping her prince-charming will ask her, but ever-so-slowly things go wrong when she is asked to prom by someone else, and then there is a fire destroying all things prom decoration.  Enter Jesse (Thomas McDonell).  He’s the bad-boy in this story, if you really want to call him that, whose biggest problem seems to be that he has a complicated life outside of high school.  As punishment for something minor by most any other high school standard, he is ordered to help Nova rebuild all of the decorations for prom, and yes, you can pretty much assume what happens when Ms. Perfect is paired with Mr. Bad-Boy, right before the prom.

And so, we get little stories about various high schoolers, from the jock, to the nerd, to the dork, to the Goth, and how their lives get effected by A) Having to leave high school soon, B) Having to ask the right person to prom, C) Having to deal with the jock making the moves on your girl, D) Girls breaking up best friends, and E) Just about every other cliché you can think of, but in a Disney-safe kind of way.

Look, the movie is pretty much harmless, as long as your daughter doesn’t get ultimately delusioned that high school will be the way this movie shows it to be.  Yes, the stories probably end up similar, but the real world always seems a little, or maybe a lot, edgier than a Disney film, so I guess, sure, for your younger daughter, she who likes something like a Hannah Montana, “Prom” will give her a Disney-fake world, but if your girl has already hit freshman year I’m guessing she will already know nothing happens like it happens in “Prom.”

In the end the acting of the lead characters is fine, it’s your classic story of good-girl falls for bad-boy who really isn’t that bad when you get to know him, all wrapped up in Disney goodness.  For me the movie was a 1 star, cliché mess, but for some young girls I can see them finding it a 4 star gem.  I’ll average stuff together, drop it a bit for a lot of bad acting by most others in the film (watch the “Making of” featurette on the Blu-ray and you’ll find out why), and leave this movie at 2 stars.   And I hate to say it, I remember the trailer, laughed a little during the clips of Justin (Jared Kusnitz) trying to ask girls to prom, and thought it might be better.  Sadly, in the end, even those scenes turned out bad.

As far as the Blu-ray you get a “Making of…,” which is nice enough in telling you how the film ended up on the big screen, the blooper reel is pretty lame, you find that they made the right decision in leaving out the deleted scenes, and there are some music videos for your viewing pleasure.  They don’t really add that much, so for the most part your tween is getting this to keep watching the movie, making her own dream of how her prom will be, and probably finding Jesse dreamy.  And, oh yea, I almost forgot the “Last Chance Lloyd” short, highlighting Lloyd’s various exploits at trying to ask a girl to prom.  Cute enough, but then it just dragged on too long.  Oh well.

That’s it for this one!  I’m The Dude on the Right!!  L8R!!!

American Dreamz

MPAA Rated – PG-13
It’s 1:47 Long
A Review by:
– The Dude on the Right

American Dreamz
Movie Stats & Links
Starring: Mandy Moore, Hugh Grant, Dennis Quaid
MPAA Rated: PG-13
Released By: Universal Pictures
Directed By: Paul Weitz

Here it is, a movie poking fun at the “American Idol” phenomenon, while throwing in some terrorism. Can that really be funny? From the trailer, I have to say I chuckled quite a bit, and am actually looking forward to this.

For “American Dreamz” we get Dennis Quaid as the President. He’s been in a bit of a funk lately, and needs to spruce up his image. We also get Hugh Grant as the host of the TV show, “American Dreamz,” you know, a talent show where singing is important. He’s not happy with what he’s doing anymore, but still does it because, well, he’s popular. Mandy Moore is Sally. She has dreams of being a big star, much like many a girl who thinks she can sing. How does this involve terrorism? Well, it seems that to spruce up the President’s image, his people decide that the Big Man should be a guest judge on “American Dreamz,” and why not? Well, some terrorist dude sees this as an opportunity to kill the President, so he convinces an Arab contestant on the show that he better get to the finals, where he can be a suicide bomber to off the President. The scene is meant to be funny, but I’m sure there will be some backlash at this part of the movie.
Anyway, the film looks quirky, and I’m a fan of both Mandy Moore and Dennis Quaid, so I’ll be heading to my local gigaplex to catch it.
That’s it for this preview! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

Source Code

MPAA Rated – PG-13
It’s 1:33 Long
A Review by:
– The Dude on the Right

Source Code
Movie Stats & Links
Starring: Jake Gyllenhaal, Michelle Monaghan, Vera Farmiga
MPAA Rated: PG-13
Released By: Summit Entertainment
Release Date: July 26, 2011
Kiddie Movie: Not too young, they may never ride a train again.
Date Movie: It’s a good movie for you to snuggle on the couch.
Gratuitous Sex: Nah.
Gratuitous Violence: There is some killing and, well, the train does blow up a number of times.
Action: There is some chasing, but nothing crazy.
Laughs: A chuckle here and there.
Memorable Scene: The ending e-mail.
Memorable Quote: Nothing stood out.
Directed By: Duncan Jones

As the credits started to roll when my wife and I were watching “Source Code,” she simply said, “Is there some extra special feature on there that will explain what the fuck they meant?” Happily, on the “Source Code” Blu-ray, there is, but sadly it’s embedded in the “Access: Source Code” feature, which pretty much makes you watch the entire movie, again.  She didn’t have time for that and relied on my infinite knowledge of the space-time continuum for an explanation, which, in transposing space and time, I basically shifted the conversation to “Did you like the movie?” She did. And so did I.

Here’s the basics…

Jake Gyllenhaal is a soldier, Captain Colter Stevens, and he finds himself transported into the body of a man on a commuter train.  It seems that this train gets blown up, and through the magic of a government program, he can “infiltrate” the last eight minutes of a person’s life.  So, his new mission is to find out who blows up the train, or at least gather enough intel to prevent the second attack that is coming soon.  The problem is that Colter has to pretty much re-live this explosion over and over again, each time going back to his mission-control capsule to report on his findings.  The other problem is that, along the way, he finds himself falling for a train passenger, Christina (Michelle Monaghan – and who wouldn’t?), and also learns that in conjunction with re-living the last eight minutes of this mystery dude’s life, he can also manipulate the events happening along the way.

So, for our multiple train rides, we get Captain Stevens learning from each trip, falling in love, learning the true value of the “Source Code,” and hopefully saving Chicago from being blown-up.

You want the key to why I really liked “Source Code?” Well, the movie people didn’t get too crazy with stuff, and by that I mean that we don’t get a lot of back-story about Captain Stevens, just enough to pretty much know he is a good soldier and misses his father, we also don’t get too crazy in the back-story of Christina, and we also don’t get too crazy into the total science of the story.  Nope, like an action-packed version of the movie “Groundhog Day,” instead of Bill Murray continuing to go back until he learns about love, we get a mission of saving humanity, with a touch of love.  And I’ve got to say, as the movie was ending, I almost got a little weepy knowing the fate of Captain Stevens, or did I? And even better? The movie clocks in at about and hour and half, just long enough to give you a great movie, and not one of those movies where you get antsy thinking it’s about 15 minutes too long!

I don’t want to give too much of the movie away because the joy of this film is the journey Captain Stevens takes from his first infiltration to his final conclusion, and telling anything more would really ruin the fun.

Your wife might not understand it, hell, you probably won’t understand it either (although you’ll probably try to make something up to satisfy her and make her think you are super-smart), but just sit back, strap it in, and enjoy a movie that takes you on a wild ride, albeit it’s sort of the same ride over and over again, on the same train, for about an hour and half. But it sure is fun!  It’s 4 ½ stars out of 5 for “Source Code,” and not just because the commuter train blows up in front of my college alma mater, Illinois Institute of Technology.  It’s a great rental for the both of you to snuggle, and even the older kids to enjoy with you.

In terms of the extras, for the Blu-ray, most of them are embedded in the “Access: Source Code” feature, which is really cool even if you do have to watch the movie again.  During the movie, you will get pop-ups with movie trivia, interviews with the cast, and most importantly, experts telling you about time travel that might help explain the movie’s ending.

Avatar

MPAA Rated – PG-13
It’s 2:42 Long
A Review by:
– The Dude on the Right

Avatar
Movie Stats & Links
Starring: Sam Worthington, Zoe Saldana, Michelle Rodriguez, Sigourney Weaver, Stephen Lang, Giovanni Ribisi
MPAA Rated: PG-13
Released By: 20th Century Fox
Kiddie Movie: Lots of people and Na’vi get killed. Hire a sitter.
Date Movie: It’s got a love story and lots of Na’vi butts and the dudes get quality violence.
Gratuitous Sex: There is some jungle love and the Na’vi are in skimpy, jungle outfits.
Gratuitous Violence: Arrows are pretty brutal when they go right into your chest.
Action: There’s running, jumping, and flying bird-things.
Laughs: There’s some chuckles.
Memorable Scene: Pandora is cool.
Memorable Quote: “I’m probably just talking to a tree right now, but…”
Directed By: James Cameron

I will never admit how many times I actually went to the theater to see “Titanic,” but let’s just say that I went at least one time by myself, went to see it with a group of friends who hadn’t seen the movie yet, and then, well, I went, umm, never mind. Since “Avatar” and “Titanic” are both by James Cameron I thought I would mention my weird desire to see “Titanic” multiple times because as much as I liked “Avatar,” I suppose I would like to see it one more time, but not in 3-D, in order to compare the 3-D and 2-D versions, and sure, when it comes out on Blu-ray, I can see myself watching it again, but for me, as much as I enjoyed the movie, and I know it sounds cliché, it’s no “Titanic.”

Let’s start with the story…

“Avatar” takes us down the road a bit, into the future, at a world called Pandora. Pandora is occupied by these really tall, and really fit, blue creatures called the Na’vi. The problem for the Na’vi is that Pandora has a mineral called unobtanium, us Earthlings want it, but the Na’vi are content to be one with Mother Pandora, hunting with bows and arrows, while we have flying machines and bullets. As it would be, us humans, we suck, and rather than actually work with these people whose land we invaded, the corporate dopes decide to just bring in the bulldozers and gunships to move the un-cooperating “savages.”

Enter Jake Sully (Sam Worthington). He’s a marine who lost his ability to walk on Earth, but since his brother was a scientist and was going to be a part of the Avatar program on Na’vi (sorry, I forgot to mention a small group of scientists using these hybrid creatures, Avatars, that the humans can control while plugged into this MRI-looking device – kind of like being in The Matrix but not – to easier investigate Pandora and try to live with, and understand, the Na’vi), well, Jake gets to become part of the scientific expedition. As things would have it Jake gets indoctrinated into the Na’vi world, (Most people compare it to “Dances With Wolves” but I felt a weird connection to “The Air Up There” for whatever reason), and his mission/feelings, especially because he is now in love with a tall, blue chick, Neytire (Zoe Saldana), deviate from the operation the Colonel (Stephen Lang) wants him to take on, namely infiltrate the Na’vi and learn their weaknesses, and the scientific mission that the good Doctor is leading them on (Sigourney Weaver – still great), namely not to have sex with them. But, alas, it’s time for the corporate meanies to further invade the land, and Jake has to take sides. Guess which side he ends up on?

Okay, so the story is pretty straightforward, and the acting is up there on being good enough for this kind of movie, but what transcends this movie from just a basic story of foreign invaders overtaking the locals, intertwined with a love story, is, well, The James Cameron Effect. Yup, a James Cameron movie can’t just be a movie for the sake of it, it needs to be an experience, and as technology advances so does his vision, and he takes everything to a level that movies now have to achieve. How? Well, in “Titanic” he made you feel like you were actually there, on the Titanic, and in “Avatar,” dammit, you are on Pandora, in all of its mythical and glowy splendor, and it looks scary real for being a fictitious place.

Yup, technology and filmmaking has advanced, thanks in part to the visions of James Cameron, and as you get sucked into the story there will probably come a minute or two of simply being in awe of the world of Pandora, probably wishing you had a jellyfish-looking thing land on you hand or that you could scale mountains that seemed to hover over the land, and it is reasons like this why a movie like “Avatar” really needs to be seen on the biggest screen you can find, just maybe not in 3-D, yet.

Now, I have to admit that I haven’t seen the 2-D version of the movie yet so I can’t really compare, but as cool as the 3-D effect is, and maybe it’s because I’m weird, but for me the times the 3-D looks the best seem to be in the “landscape” shots rather than the close-ups because they don’t look real, yet. How to explain? Hmm, I guess the easiest thing I can say is that during a close-up the main action looks in 3-D and in focus, but if I shift my eyes to the background it doesn’t come into focus like things do in real life. I guess I’m just a visual person and when a movie looks in 3-D I want it to act the same as my eyesight, i.e., look behind the actor and see what’s behind them, but it doesn’t work. I know, that probably doesn’t make much sense, but the effect is close, just still not “real.”

Okay, so let’s combine everything…

In comparison to “Titanic,” I would say there just wasn’t something that totally clicked with the story in “Avatar” that would make me want to see it again, and even again, and enjoy it each time, and as I think about it, maybe it was because Jake didn’t make the ultimate sacrifice for his newfound love, like Jack did, or even the other way around. I guess the easiest thing to say is that the movie ended exactly as I thought it would, in a sappier way, and that doesn’t make it different. I’m not saying it’s not good, because I don’t want to explain how it ends, but it’s just a normal Hollywood ending, rather than the main dude drowning, which now that I think about it, really made the ending of “Titanic” just a little different. In the end, though, “Avatar” is totally a must-see movie, if you like movies, and as I was wavering on just giving it 4 stars out of 5, the more I think about the awesomeness of Pandora, that’s worth an extra star. So, it’s 5 stars out of 5, and after telling my BFF that she probably doesn’t need to see it until it comes to Blu-ray, now I’m wondering if I should try to change her mind, if only so I can see it on a normal screen to fully compare the two. Hmm?

Oh well, go see it, keep the little kids at home because it’s got some gratuitous violence and they would probably have to pee a couple of times during the movie, and just enjoy some quality time with your honey.

That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

Angels & Demons

MPAA Rated – PG-13
It’s 2:15 Long
A Review by:
– The Dude on the Right

Angels & Demons
Movie Stats & Links
Starring: Tom Hanks, Ewan McGregor, Ayelet Zurer
MPAA Rated: PG-13
Released By: Columbia Pictures
Kiddie Movie: There’s a lot of violence and they’d just be confused. Leave them at home.
Date Movie: My BFF enjoyed it, so I say bring them along.
Gratuitous Sex: Robert Langdon stays celibate, and keeps his clothes on, too.
Gratuitous Violence: Some people get burned, shot, drowned, etc., so yea
Action: There’s a lot of running and chasing.
Laughs: A chuckles here and there.
Memorable Scene: I still like the puzzle solving, and would love to visit the Vatican archives.
Memorable Quote: Nothing really.
Directed By: Ron Howard

I still can’t figure out what all of the hubbub was about that the Catholic Church originally brought up because my take on “Angels & Demons” is that the church might have their problems, but most of the problems in this movie are caused by a rogue priest, or maybe a couple of rogue priests, much like the problems in any religion, so Catholicism bashing aside, is the movie any good? You betcha!

“Angels & Demons” is actually a book that was released before “The Da Vinci Code,” but for the movie they shift it to being after the movie you probably saw, and you know what, you get the same kind of problem-solving, good looking girl, let’s try and save a life or two, and let’s get to the root of this problem to save something, kind of flick that you found in that Da Vinci film. And like that Da Vinci film, don’t try to hard to understand all of the story, just enjoy the ride.

Pretty much “Angels & Demons” involves a supposed plot from a group called The Illuminati (yea, you might also remember them from the Lara Kroft: Tomb Raider movie – I guess they get around, don’t they?). In any case, the Pope is dead, the Cardinals are getting ready to elect a new Pope, some Cardinal dudes get kidnapped, and a super-duper energy source also gets stolen. It seems that The Illuminati are pissed, looking for revenge on the Catholic Church for some atrocities years earlier, and to get their revenge, and fulfill an ancient prophesy, they are going to kill the four Cardinal dudes and then blow up The Vatican. Enter Robert Langdon (Tom Hanks). Sure, the Church is still pissed at Langdon for the whole “Jesus had siblings” thing from the previous movie, but they need the best, especially since there are only a few hours to get the puzzles solved, so in comes Bob, and with the help of Vittoria Vetra (Ayelet Zurer), the scientist who can stop the anti-matter bomb from exploding, well, it’s a race across Rome to find the places the Cardinals are set to be killed, and also find the anti-matter bomb.

Along for the ride are some police dudes, all in conflict with each other because the Swiss Guards don’t like the Roman police, etc., but keeping everyone together is the good Camerlengo (Ewan McGregor). The Camerlengo, kind of the person in charge in between Popes, seems to have it all together, but maybe something is up with him as well.

Look, like “The Da Vinci Code,” “Angels & Demons” is just a fun ride at the movies where I don’t think you are supposed to understand everything, just sit back and have a little fun while your brain gets confused, and like “The Da Vinci” code, most critics are bashing it, but not this one, I’m like the movie for exactly what it is – just a fun romp with some clues to solve so that the good people can be saved.

Tom Hanks does his normal, steady self in the Langdon role, although I liked him better with the hair in the Da Vinci film, Ayelet Zurer is good enough as the easy-on-the-eyes dudette who tags along for the ride, and Ewan McGregor is fine in his role as the Camerlengo. You do get a good chunk of violence in this movie as the Cardinals do end up dying in some pretty gruesome ways, but hey, the movie is about a sinister society, hell-bent on getting revenge on the Catholic Church.

I say, much like you did for “The Da Vinci Code”, ignore all of the critics except me and go see “Angels & Demons.” Yup, the story is kind of preposterous, you might see the ending coming even if you haven’t read the book, and you might have some fun. What you probably won’t get is coming out of the movie thinking the church is a bunch of anti-science, old-school farts who don’t care about the current world we live in. For me it’s 3 ½ stars out of 5. Go ahead and see it, and don’t worry if you don’t understand what anti-matter really is, it doesn’t matter that much to the plot other than it will explode if it touches real matter.

That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

The Andromeda Strain

MPAA Rated – Unrated
It’s ?? Long
A Review by:
– The Dude on the Right

The Andromeda Strain
Movie Stats & Links
Starring: Benjamin Bratt, Eric McCormack, Christa Miller, Daniel Dae Kim
MPAA Rated: Unrated
Released By: Universal Home Video
Kiddie Movie: Only if you want them to fear aliens.
Date Movie: She will probably snuggle with you.
Gratuitous Sex: Only a little talk.
Gratuitous Violence: There are some quality kills.
Action: Nah.
Laughs: A chuckle or two.
Memorable Scene: The “countdown to destruction” scene is stupid.
Memorable Quote: None.
Directed By: Mikael Salmom

Watching a “made for TV” movie on DVD is kind of weird, simply because the movie can’t fully flow as “commercial break” pauses are prevalent throughout, but I have to say that if you are looking for a decent “This is the end of mankind” kind of movie, in the spirit of “Star Trek: The Next Generation” episodes, put the 2008 version of “The Andromeda Stain” on your list of DVD’s to watch. And sure, I hate to put the “Star Trek” reference in there, but like most TV shows, “The Andromeda Strain” gives you about two hours and thirty minutes of set-up, conflict, theories, and then is able to wrap up the solution for the devastating problem in about fifteen minutes. Such is TV sometimes.

Here’s the story…

A satellite crashes to Earth and suddenly a small town of people finds itself dead. Also finding themselves dead are the first military folks to find themselves in the town. It’s now time to bring in the scientists, including Dr. Stone (Benjamin Bratt in a role I kinda like him in), Dr. Noyce (Christa Miller in full “I have to overact” role), and a few more, seeming to have to fight, of course, with the government folks, especially General Mancheck (Andre Braugher), who don’t want to give the scientist folks the necessary information to solve what might be something to destroy mankind.

Low and behold, as the story plays out, “The Andromeda Strain” deals with all kinds of things, like wormholes and creatures at the bottom of the oceans, and as our scientist folks decipher all of the clues, damn, wouldn’t you know it, they are in a super-sealed bunker where a simple accident might also destroy humanity.

This DVD review will be quick because I will simply say that as much as “The Andromeda Strain” has lots of potential as a “here comes the end of humanity” movie, it so much loses itself in becoming totally predictable, especially as a “made for TV” movie (although being an A&E TV movie does allow for some quality kills), complete with a “self-destruct” sequence, with countdown music, when Dr. Stone, thankfully, is able to save the world with only a couple of seconds left before we are doomed.

I’d say you should rent it, but the extras on the DVD aren’t that spectacular, so maybe you should just wait for A&E to replay the mini-series, and find out why we might want to pay attention to what is really going on at the International Space Station.

This DVD gets 2 ½ stars out of 5.

That’s it for this one! I’m the Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

DVD: It’s got some extra stuff, but unless you are a total sci-fi geek, you won’t care.

Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy

MPAA Rated – PG-13
It’s 1:35 Long
A Review by:
– The Dude on the Right

Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy
Movie Stats & Links
Starring: Will Ferrell, Christina Applegate, Paul Rudd, Fred Willard, Chris Parnell, Vince Vaughn
MPAA Rated: PG-13
Released By: Dreamworks SKG
Kiddie Movie: Only if you want to explain a boner joke.
Date Movie: It’s funny for couples.
Gratuitous Sex: No nudity, but Ron and Veronica get it on.
Gratuitous Violence: A very strange fight scene between anchormen including an arm getting chopped off.
Action: Nah.
Laughs: Tons.
Memorable Scene: The boner scene.
Memorable Quote: Too many to list.
Directed By: Adam McKay

Let me start this review with a letter to Will Ferrell:
Dear Mr. Ferrell,

I would just like to commend you on your latest comedy, “Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy.” I found it very enjoyable and laughed a lot. Actually, you know, lately I’ve been laughing a lot at all of the movies you’ve been involved in. From your childish demeanor in “Elf,” to Frank the Tank in “Old School,” all the way back to Mustafa in the “Austin Powers” movie, you are showing that you have the versatility to bring comedy to every role you fill. In looking at your upcoming projects, at least according to IMDB, it appears that you are sticking to the comedic genre, and in my opinion, that’s good (although I am a little leery about the Woody Allen flick, but I’ll take a wait and see attitude on that right now). All I ask is one thing: Please, please, please stick to comedy. Look, down in your heart somewhere you might have this strange inkling to be a serious actor, and maybe you could be, but all I ask is please don’t pull a Jim Carrey on me like he did with “The Majestic.” You make people laugh, that’s your talent, and maybe it won’t get you a little gold statue, but you’re probably entertaining a hell of a lot more people doing what you do best than in any serious role you could fill. I mean, when was the last time a Robert Redford movie had me laugh so hard soda-pop came up my nose. Just my two cents.

Have a nice day,
The Dude on the Right

Okay, now to the review…

It’s the 70’s baby, when male chauvinism was at its peak, or at least it really seemed that way, especially because men kept treating women like the sex objects we all think they are, we just can’t act that way now because it’s not socially acceptable for a man to grab a woman’s butt and women can’t just go up and run her fingers through a man’s incredibly hairy chest on the street anymore. Anyway, enough lamenting about the old days when I was, well, approaching that impressionable age of 10. Well, for this movie we get Will Farrell as Ron Burgundy. He’s THE anchorman in San Diego, the anchorman all of the ladies love, yet he can’t really find love. But popularity is his game, and he holds that over the rest of the San Diego anchors like it’s a gold medal at the Olympics. But enter Veronica (Christina Applegate – looking just as great as ever). Her dream is to be a network anchor, something that in those days seemed like a total impossibility. She’s relegated to field reporting, things like an animal beauty pageant, and can’t stand it, but knows maybe someday, if she works hard enough, she might get her shot. But Ron is smitten with Veronica, and they begin an office romance destined for destruction. Now it’s war, with Ron and his anchor buddies set on bringing Veronica down, mostly because all of them feel threatened.

You know what, enough of the story synopsis. Will Ron and Veronica make nice, and will Veronica eventually become a network anchor? Will Brick (Steve Carell) say something that remotely makes sense, and will Jack Black be targeted by the ASPCA? All of these questions and more will be answered.

But is the movie funny? Hell yes, especially if Will Ferrell has ever made you laugh in any other movie. You get a wonderful cast of characters, especially Ron’s fellow newsmen, and some people complain about Fred Willard being wasted in his role as the boss, but I found him perfect, especially talking to the nun over the phone. If the trailer made you laugh, you’ll probably really like this movie, especially if you like a good boner joke, but if you just don’t get the humor of Ron doing a cannonball into the pool, stay away. It’s 4 ½ stars out of 5 for “Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy.”

That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

Anaconda

MPAA Rated – PG-13
It’s 1:30 Long
A Review by:
– The Dude on the Right

Anaconda
Movie Stats & Links
Starring: Eric Stoltz, Jennifer Lopez, Ice Cube, John Voight
MPAA Rated: PG-13
Released By: Columbia Pictures
Kiddie Movie: Only if you want them afraid of snakes for the rest of their lives.
Date Movie: Good chance of your lady jumpin’ in your lap!
Gratuitous Sex: Nope.
Gratuitous Violence: It’s got some violence, and the Anaconda eats people.
Action: Some, but mostly suspense.
Laughs: Come on, it’s about a big snake that eats people.
Memorable Scene: When Sarone (Jon Voight) gets eaten, and then a little later, un-eaten.
Memorable Quote: Not really.
Directed By: Luis Llosa

I saw the previews, I saw the billboards, I saw the ads, and all I could figure was that the movie “Anaconda” was about some people who get stuck in a river and get scared by a big snake. What those previews didn’t show was that this movie ends up being more about deceit and naïve people, as well as about survival.

Let me put the story line to you like this. You’ve got these documentary filmmakers heading into Amazon territory in search of the legendary Shirishama Indians. All is going well until they pick up this stranded guy on the bank of the river. This guy, Sarone, played by Jon Voight, is a snake poacher, and ends up being one really bad dude. When the anthropologist, Steven Cale (Eric Stoltz), finds himself unconscious, it’s up to the crew to find the quickest way home. They listen to Sarone,

Sarone (Jon Voight, r.) playfully demonstrates the deadly grip of a baby Anaconda on Warren’s (Jonathan Hyde) finger. he says he knows the way, but his way is to find this big snake first, and then maybe lead the crew to safety. It takes a while, but the crew figure out his plan, unfortunately for them it’s too late because Sarone has a gun and holds them all hostage while he’s hunting (or would that be fishing?) for the Anaconda. Well, things go wrong, some people die, it’s a fight for survival and trying to get home before becoming dinner.

It may sound simple enough, and maybe a boring movie, but it’s not. Acting wise, there isn’t much to speak of, all except for Jon Voight. I haven’t seen a crazed psychopath on this level since most anything Dennis Hopper plays. Voight will have you hating him, but believing him, all the while having

The world’s largest snake: the Anaconda. his own agenda without any regard to who dies. He was great and I’d recommend seeing this movie for his performance alone. Now the other character who did a great job for this film was the snake. This gargantuan animatronic special effect, combined with some real life Anacondas as well, will probably give even people who love snakes the creeps. Yea, sometimes the big guy does look a little fake, but seeing the snake eat a dude and do some other natural things is pretty cool.

I didn’t think they could make a movie about a big snake, and you know, they didn’t. Sure, the Anaconda plays a big role in the action and suspense of this film, but even without the fear of being

Terri (Jennifer Lopez) struggles to help free Danny (Ice Cube) from the deadly grip of an Anaconda. swallowed whole this film could have made it as a suspense film nonetheless. Voight was terrific, so was the snake, I just really wish the rest of the cast could have been as convincing. Don’t get me wrong, they did alright, but the film could have moved up a notch on the acting scale.

So, should you see it? Sure. I haven’t jumped in my seat in a long time, and if any snakes give you the creeps than “Anaconda” will have you covering your eyes (the guy in from of me did). Not the greatest film of all time, but pretty creepy. It’s 3 stars out of 5 for “Anaconda.”

That’s it for this one, I’m The Dude on the Right!!! L8R!!!

Take Me Home Tonight

MPAA Rated – R
It’s 1:37 Long
A Review by:
– The Dude on the Right

Take Me Home Tonight
Movie Stats & Links
Starring: Topher Grace, Anna Faris, Dan Fogler, Teresa Palmer
MPAA Rated: R
Released By: Twentieth Century Fox Home Entertainment
Release Date: July 19, 2011
Kiddie Movie: Send them to bed!
Date Movie: My wife said it was “Cute.”
Gratuitous Sex: It’s got a lot, complete with boobs and some weird voyourism in a bathroom.
Gratuitous Violence: Nothing gratuitous.
Action: Nah.
Laughs: Lots of chuckles from start to finish.
Memorable Scene: Nothing totally stood out.
Memorable Quote: Nah.
Directed By: Michael Dowse

Sometimes a movie is perfect for a certain age group, and from the variety of reviews I’ve seen of “Take Me Home Tonight,” you can probably gauge if the reviewer was in high school in the mid-eighties, maybe went to college during that same time period, also could have been a geek during said eighties and always wanted to ask out the hot chick in high school but never had their “in.” That person will probably love “Take Me Home Tonight,” while most everyone else might have a hard time relating and/or laughing.  I am that person who lived the 80’s, and I laughed a lot, but I do understand if you don’t get it.

“Take Me Home Tonight” gives us Topher Grace as Matt, and he’s got a sister, Wendy, played by Anna Faris.  Yup, it’s the eighties, Matt is in love with Tori (Teresa Palmer), but he’s a geek heading to MIT and she’s the cool chick.  Alas, college comes and goes, Matt finds himself still trying to discover his path in life, a path that now includes working at Suncoast Video, but upon seeing Tori again, it’s time for Matt to step up his game, and what better place to step up a game than at a weekend semi-reunion party at the cool kid’s house.  Yup, everyone is old enough to drink legally now, and Matt is on a quest to get Tori’s phone number.

So, sort of like “American Pie,” we have a get-together where lots of people are trying to maybe impress someone else, or just get through it.  On the ride is Matt’s friend, Barry (Dan Fogler), recently fired from his job but finding some cocaine in a car he “borrowed” from his previous employer.  With that we get a movie with drugs, boobs, sex, a look at high finance (It seems Tori made good, finding herself in the finance world which sets the stage for the second part of the movie as the party-goers end up in Beverly Hills), and oddly, something I could kind of relate to, and laughed a lot.

Look, the movie isn’t the funniest thing out there, and Chris Pratt plays a nice version of Stifler ala “American Pie,” but there is enough to keep the movie going that can make you chuckle from start to finish, that is if you can relate to the time-period of the movie.  Seriously, I can see someone being 55 years old thinking this movie is stupid, I can also see the twenty-something’s not really getting it, but for those of us old enough to remember how you always were trying to compete, how sometimes you did stupid stuff but now you grew up and live a little more vicariously through movies, and love classic 80’s music, you’ll probable enjoy “Take Me Home Tonight.”

I nice, little, solid comedy with some romance for people who can relate to graduating in the eighties, I’ll give “Take Me Home Tonight” 3 1/2 stars out of 5, though I can understand if you think it sucks.

As far as the Blu-ray bonus stuff, this isn’t a movie destined for a four disc box set, but the extras are nice enough with some deleted scenes (sure, most were better off deleted), and for music fans, it’s an eighties plethora of memories with quick access to songs during the movie, and a little cast get-together for good measure.

Go ahead, rent the Blu-ray, and put yourself back in the eighties where you sometimes wish you still were.

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part II

MPAA Rated – PG-13
It’s 2:10 Long
A Review by:
– The Dude on the Right

Harry Potter
and the
Deathly Hallows: Part II
Movie Stats & Links
Starring: Ralph Fiennes, Daniel Radcliffe, Rupert Grint, Emma Watson
MPAA Rated: PG-13
Released By: Warner Bros.
Release Date: July 15, 2011
Kiddie Movie: It’s pretty violent at times so be careful.
Date Movie: Even if you’re date isn’t a fan, they should be able to follow along.
Gratuitous Sex: Nah.
Gratuitous Violence: No real blood, but some gruesomeness occurs.
Action: There is a lot of chasing and people falling off of tall things.
Laughs: Some good chuckles, especially if you know the story.
Memorable Scene: The final revelation of Snape.
Memorable Quote: Nothing stood out.
Directed By: David Yates

I was a little worried going into “Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part II”, especially since I hadn’t seen the “Half-Blood Prince” nor Part I of the “Deathly Hallows,” but I’ll tell you what – For the final version all you really need to know is that there is this wizard, Harry, and his nemesis is this dude with a smooshed-in-face, Voldermort, and this is their final battle.  Ignore the rest of the stuff, the “who loves whom,” the “who is related to whom,” the “what is this stuff with snakes and gremlins and dragons,” and just enjoy a ride of a fun battle of good versus evil where magic wands control their world.

In any case, here it is, the finale, the end, the second part of a book that took two movies to tell the story, it’s “Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part II.”  Pretty much we find Harry, Ron, and Hermione (Daniel Radcliffe, Rupert Grint, and Emma Watson), whom many of us have grown up with as we have grown up, coming upon the final quest of Harry’s life – to finally battle Lord Voldermort, and maybe find out the truth about his life.  Yup, there is adventure as they need to find these three things that can make Voldermort immortal, or something like that, and if they can destroy all of them, they can then, hopefully, get rid of Voldermort once and for all.  Through it all we get transported to the roller-coaster ride of the bank vaults that the gremlins protect, a dragon ride, and a really cool battle between statues and, oh, I can’t remember what the big dude are, as wizards throw spells and the army of Voldermort fights the do-gooders of Hogwarts.

As a movie, with maybe just a five minute intro, “Part II” could really stand on its own as a film because it’s got everything – Love, excitement, sadness, good, evil, and some kick-ass battle scenes, but really all you need to know is it’s Harry against Voldermort, and somebody has to die.

The visuals are stunning in the movie, and for a change I opted for a 3-D film and liked it because it wasn’t shot for “Oh look, this is 3-D,” but rather “Here’s a film with a great story, and the 3-D is there to just enjoy.”

I am a little sorry to see the series come to an end, but I think that one of the best things about the Harry Potter series is that it had a great start, followed the book story for the most part, and then came to an ending, rather than just trying to push out versions that seem like “Hey, we need to make another movie because the last one made so much money.”  I know this might be a little bit of blasphemy, but in terms of a movie series I think, in the grand scheme of stories, Harry Potter blows Star Wars out of the water as a full body of work. I know this is sort of a tangent for this review, but hey, it’s what I think.

A solid ending for Harry Potter is what I think “Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part II” is, and hey, you can probably see it even if you never saw and of the previous films – Enjoy the ride!  It’s 4 ½ stars out of 5, and I even say spend the extra bucks and see it in 3-D.

That’s it for this one!  I’m The Dude on the Right!!  L8R!!!