Andy Labis, Author at Entertainment Ave!

Blood and Wine

MPAA Rated – R
It’s 1:40 Long
A Review by:
– Stu Gotz

Blood and Wine Movie Stats & Links
Starring:	Jack Nicholson, Judy Davis, Jennifer Lopez, Stephen Dorff, Michael Caine
MPAA Rated:	R
Released By:	Fox Searchlight
Release Date:	1996
Kiddie Movie:	Much less appropriate for kids than it is for dates.
Date Movie:	Save the money and take her to a Steak and Shake instead.
Gratuitous Sex:	One nipple would have rated this movie an additional half star from me.
Gratuitous Violence:	I had a violent attitude after seeing this movie.
Action:	Fights, car chases, all with a dash of salt.
Laughs:	I sat in my seat laughing about how bad the movie was.
Memorable Scene:	Actually… The fact that the movie didn’t slap a happy romantic cliché ending was the only thing memorable about this movie for me.
Memorable Quote:	“Baby, I’m gonna take you away from all this.” Do real people really say this while dancing the marimba in lingerie? Not in my book. But then again this movie was definitely not my type of book.
Directed By:	Bob Rafelson

Have you ever made chicken soup? I’m not talking about busting out a can of Campbell’s but actually making it from scratch? The recipe for chicken soup is pretty simple and hard to mess up (although it can be done). By adding the right components, at the right time, and in the right amounts, nine times out of ten you wind up with a pretty basic soup. In time and with a little practice one can even learn how to doctor up a basic chicken soup recipe and make it into something totally kick-ass and far from basic.

Did you know that Hollywood knows the secret to kick-ass chicken soup and very often applies it to the recipe of making movies. A lot of times the creation is supreme, but other times it’s just plain old broth. Such is the case of the new Jack Nicholson and Michael Cane movie “Blood & Wine.”

This movie reminded me of my Jeep on a cold winter’s day – it just didn’t want to start. But back to the soup comparison. Like waiting for that pot of water to boil, this movie seemed to take forever to build to something exciting. After the water did get boiling the writers added some good stock in the way of bad guy characters in Alex Gates (Nicholson) and Victor Spansky (Cane). Lots of potential here. Later came a little salt which reviled the plot to a jewel heist. To spice things up a bit some salsa was added in the way of Gabriella (Jennifer Lopez – hubba-hubba, what a babe) who portrayed a Latin love interest. For good measure the writers even threw in a little sour lemon as a way to potentially spoil a perfect crime.

They followed the recipe, and even tried to add something special, so why was it that this movie was so bad? I think it’s because I’ve been fed chicken broth, stew, casserole, gumbo, and flambé all my life. I’m tired of that recipe and its deviations. What I want is something new, and this movie is not new. Actually, to be fair, the movie should actually get acclaim for being a perfect example of a “Hollywood Cook Book Movie,” but for me it was like one of those old Gum Shoe novels made for late night TV. Slow, boring, and predictable. I really don’t know whose ass I wanted to kick more after seeing the movie, Fox for releasing it or the Dude on the Right for making me pay $4.50 to go see it. I cannot recommend this movie to the everyday kind of guy, but if you’re a film student the structure will appeal to you, and if you’re a dorky Chicago film critic it will appeal to you because you’re an artsy horses ass that has lost touch with the blue collar class people like me. Sorry Jack but I can only give your movie 1 out of 5 stars. Please don’t kick my ass! Later…

Blindness

MPAA Rated – R
It’s 2:01 Long
A Preview by:
– The Dude on the Right

Blindness Movie Stats & Links
Starring:	Julianne Moore, Mark Ruffalo
MPAA Rated:	R
Released By:	Miramax
Release Date:	2008
Directed By:	Fernando Meirelles

So we’ve got a creepy movie where people are suddenly going blind, and now it just might be up to Julianne Moore, I think, to figure out what the hell is going on. Social order breaks down, with people not being able to see of course, but if she is the only person who is able to see, and sure she might love her husband, wouldn’t it just be easier for her to just get the hell out of town?

The movie does have a more artsy side to it, at least for the trailer, and I’m assuming Julianne doesn’t bolt town because she loves her husband, that and it looks like the government seals off the town, but maybe that now all of these blind people are getting super-human hearing because they can’t see, and maybe they can sense Julianne can see.

The movie is in the middle of the Fall movie season and it looks creepy enough, and sometimes I’m all about a creepy movie. We’ll see what opens against it, but I might try to catch “Blindness” if it hits my gigaplex.

That’s it for this preview! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

The New Year is Here, I Loved “The Fighter,” Advice for Carol Mosley Braun, and Yup, I’m Watching “The Bachelor.”

By: The Dude on the Right

Download and Listen

It’s a New Year, it’s a “Weekend Wrap-Up!” podcast, and Stu Gotz isn’t here because, as it turns out, you can’t really just leave your kids at their school when school is not in session. Alas, I’m flying solo for this podcast, that, for reasons beyond my control, couldn’t get posted until tonight even though I recorded it a few days ago, but during it I give my recap of my New Year’s Eve festivities, my take on Dick Clark, my strange addiction to Janet Davies handling the Chicago countdown, and wouldn’t you know it, I saw some movies!

Yup, the extended weekend allowed me to catch “The Fighter” and really like it, allowed me to watch “The Kids are All Right” and like it, and watch “Wall Street: Money Never Sleep” and play Cityville at the same time. And in further review, I realize I don’t have “Eat. Pray. Love.” up next on my Netflix queue as I mention in the podcast, so we’ll see how My BFF enjoys something a little different, or hits me with a frying pan.

Also, “The Bachelor” has kicked back in to TV land, and I’m not totally into it, find the vampire girl creepy, and am sad the Palos Hills, IL, girl did not get a rose, but, I’m sure once we get rid of some of the dead weight, I’ll be sucked right back into it!

Hopefully Stu will be back next week where we can recap his holiday travels, recap CES that neither of us attended, talk about movies we want to see, see if Stu agrees with my mayoral advice for Carol Mosley Braun, and maybe he’ll find out if my wife hits me over the head with a frying pan or not for my Netflix selection.

Thanks for listening!

That’s it for this podcast! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps

MPAA Rated – PG-13
It’s 2:13 Long
A Blu-ray Review by:
– The Dude on the Right

Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps Movie Stats & Links
Starring:	Michael Douglas, Shia LeBeouf, Josh Brolin, Carey Mulligan, Frank Langella
MPAA Rated:	PG-13
Released By:	Twentieth Century Fox Home Entertainment
Kiddie Movie:	I don’t think they’ll get it, nor enjoy it.
Date Movie:	My wife fell asleep during it.
Gratuitous Sex:	I’d like to say it would have helped, but I doubt it.
Gratuitous Violence:	Nah.
Action:	Nah.
Laughs:	Nah.
Memorable Scene:	Nothing really.
Memorable Quote:	None really.
Directed By:	Oliver Stone
Cool Things About the Blu-ray	The normal audio commentary stuff, conversation with the cast, and stuff that was left on the cutting room floor, among other stuff.

Yes, I will admit that I didn’t see the original “Wall Street,” at least I don’t think I did. I mean, that was 1987, I was just out of high school and wanting to be an engineer, so high finance was the furthest thing from my mind. What I do remember is that Michael Douglas was in it, and he was a bad man, and that is all. Yet here we are, 2011, I no longer want to be an engineer, “Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps” is here, and as much as I want to be involved in high finance, and after even watching the movie, I think I cared even less about the movie franchise.

I do know that Shia LaBeouf is in this version. He’s Jake, a young whippersnapper on Wall Street, with desires of saving the world by helping a fusion energy source get funded, or something to that effect. He’s also in love, with Winnie (Carey Mulligan), who also happens to be Gordon Gekko’s daughter. Yup, that’s Gordon played again by Michael Douglas. Well, Gordon is getting out of jail for the bad stuff he did in the original movie, I guess, and as the firm Jake works at is on the brink of disaster, and his boss kills himself, Jake decides to enlist the help of Gordon, the old master, to set things right.

Gordon, of course, can’t easily be swayed, and what better way to get Gordon back into the picture than to try to get him and his estranged daughter back together, so there Jake is, trusting a snake like Gordon to help humanity, himself, and his daughter. And yup, you can guess it, Gordon is still up to his old tricks, even in this new, digital age that he isn’t very familiar with, but yup, there is some “awakening” by Gordon thanks to, well, I won’t spoil that.

Look, “Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps” wants to play off of the market crash we just experienced, wants to have some heart and soul, and seems to want to send some kind of message, only I’m not sure what that message is, other than don’t trust Gordon Gekko. Michaell Dougles is great in his role, but I’m sorry Shia, you’ve’ already been typecast with the “Transformers” seriously so there isn’t any way I’m buying you as the go-getter Wall Street whippersnapper sometimes with a conscience, and sometimes without.

Sadly this movie seems like something just put together like “Hey, the markets collapsed, we need another ‘Wall Street’ movie to explain it all,” and in the end, I pretty much had forgotten most of it by the time the inevitable ending came about. I’ll give Michael Douglas a 3 star performance, dropped the movie some because Shia just is not the person for his role, and drop it a little more for the goofy “technology/internet” montages. With that it’s 2 stars out of 5 for “Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps.” I really wanted more, and just didn’t get it.

The Blu-ray does have some extras that seem interesting enough, namely things like a conversation with Oliver Stone and the rest of the cast, some deleted scenes that are probably best deleted (but at least Oliver Stone might explain why since he also does some commentary for them), and some extra character analysis and Wall Street analysis. I was pretty bored with the movie, so I’m not going to lie and say I watched the extras because I didn’t, but I’m guessing that if you like the movie, well, they will give you some fun insight into the movie-making.

That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

The A-Team

MPAA Rated – Unrated
It’s 1:59 Long
A Blu-ray Review by:
– The Dude on the Right

The A-Team Movie Stats & Links
Starring:	Liam Neeson, Bradley Cooper, Jessica Biel, Quinton “Rampage” Jackson, Sharlto Copley
MPAA Rated:	Unrated Blu-ray
Released By:	Twentieth Century Fox Home Entertainment
Kiddie Movie:	Not too young, but the boys will like the explosions.
Date Movie:	Only if she likes explosions.
Gratuitous Sex:	Mostly talk.
Gratuitous Violence:	Lots of it, but on the PG-13 level.
Action:	There’s a whole lot of chasing going on.
Laughs:	Ehh.
Memorable Scene:	Nothing really.
Memorable Quote:	None really.
Directed By:	Joe Carnahan
Cool Things About the Blu-ray	It’s got some extra insight into the characters, how things were made, and some deleted stuff/bloopers that are, ehh.

When I was a kid I loved “The A-Team” and for the longest time I heard about them wanting to make a big-screen movie based on the series, but I figured that as long as there was some fun action, some goofy stunts, and not taking themselves too seriously that things might work out. As the trailers began to come out for the movie I was mildly excited because there seemed to be all of these. Sadly, though, in my assessment of the TV series I forgot about one necessity that made it work, and that was chemistry. In the TV show there was tons of it, carried a lot by Mr. T and George Peppard in the roles of Hannibal and B.A. respectively. Sadly, in the movie, chemistry seemed to have been an afterthought.

As it is, the movie version that hit the theaters and is now out on Blu-ray adapts itself for the 2000’s, shifting our heroes from Vietnam veterans to Gulf War veterans, but instead of diving right into the theme of the TV series, about veterans framed for a crime they didn’t commit and helping others who are innocent, the current version decides to focus on the early days, how the team came together, and the mission that set them up for their being framed. All along it’s just a bunch of explosions, followed by explosions, followed by a thin story, followed by explosions.

As things move along it’s to prison they all go, it’s breaking out of prison they next go, and then it’s to the boys working to track down who originally set them up who might be trying to sell some treasury plates (Hey, we can make money!) to the Arabs. So, of course, there’s this elaborate plan to stop the bad guys, lots of things blow up some more, and our heroes are heroes, only they still aren’t getting the credit, still are considered criminals even though they saved the world economy, and the movie ends setting up a sequel if this one makes enough money.

If you’ll notice, during this synopsis I didn’t mention of the players. I sort of did that on purpose because this version of “The A-Team” focuses more on the explosions and dumb story rather than the players involved, but the thing is, what made the TV series so enjoyable was the players, the interaction, and the chemistry.

For what it’s worth, the main players are Bradley Cooper as “Faceman,” Quinton “Rampage” Jackson as B.A., and Sharlto Copley as Murdock, and, oh yea, I almost forgot Liam Neeson as Hannibal, who I think was the worst of the mis-cast people. Look, I love Liam Neeson as an actor, but for me it always seems like a loner, an stand-off-ish kind of guy, and that seems to translate into the roles he plays. As Hannibal he just wasn’t fun, you didn’t seem him as the Colonel, and I just plain didn’t like him in that role.

As it is, if you want a movie with a lot of things blowing up in a hail of gunfire, go ahead and get “The A-Team,” but for characters with chemistry, with story, with actually caring about them, this isn’t the movie. It’s 2 stars out of 5 for the movie version of “The A-Team.”

As far as the Blu-ray extras, the set actually has an “Extended Untrated Cut” that I didn’t watch because, well, I didn’t really need to see anything else blow up. There is some more detailed explanations of the characters, which is nice, and I’m always liking seeing how various action scenes are done, so that is nice, too.

American Idol is Coming, Sex and the City 2 Sucks, The A-Team Sucks Less, and Happy New Year!

By: The Dude on the Right

Download and Listen

With Stu Gotz out playing with his family it’s time for a solo “Weekend Wrap-Up!” podcast, and what better weekend to wrap up than Christmas weekend! Yup, mine was nice, what with my new wife and all, but it was also nice because it was a time to be with my new family, the Chicago Bears won, and it brings us a little closer to the 2011 season of “American Idol.” (How’s that for a brief summary of topics included in this podcast?!?)

With the weekend also came movies, and although My BFF Wifey and I didn’t go to see “Little Fockers” due to my grumpiness, we did see “Sex and the City 2,” and as much as I couldn’t believe how bad that movie was, I was as much shocked that my BFF thought it totally sucked, only saying it might be deserving of ½ star in total suckiness. She found it flabbergasting, okay, maybe not flabbergasting, but just wondered how those involved in the franchise that has been so successful could make the movie so bad. Oh well.

In other movie news I saw “The A-Team” on Blu-ray, and although my full review will be coming later this week, during the podcast I let you know if you should rent it. I guess I’ll just tease things with “There’s a lot of action.”

Stu should be back next week for a recap of his time off, maybe a reflective look back at a busy year, and maybe a look ahead at what 2011 may have in store. That, or he’ll just talk about “Burn Notice” and “Psych” some more.

Thanks for listening!

That’s it for this podcast! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

Ali

MPAA Rated – R
It’s 2:39 Long
A Preview by:
– The Dude on the Right

Ali Movie Stats & Links
Starring:	Will Smith, Jamie Foxx, Mario Van Peebles, Jon Voight
MPAA Rated:	R
Released By:	Columbia Pictures
Release Date:	12/25/2001
Directed By:	Michael Mann
Produced By:	Jon Peters

Who would have thought Will Smith could play Mohammed Ali? Not I. But as I watch the trailers for this movie it looks like Will can pull this off, and can pull this off is such a way that it will be one hell of a film and one hell of a performance that might just make us forget he ever signed up for “Wild, Wild, West.”

Will Smith is playing Mohammed Ali, from his younger days to his older days, and okay, he’s not a spitting image for Ali, but he’s sure damn close. From the things I hear and the trailers I see, well, this has the potential to be the defining film in Will Smith’s career. It looks like a total winner, it’s coming out at Christmas, and the movie has Oscar buzz written all over it.

You’ll probably go and see this movie even if you don’t think Ali is the greatest.

That’s it for this preview! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

Alexander

MPAA Rated – R
It’s 2:55 Long
A Preview by:
– The Dude on the Right

Alexander Movie Stats & Links
Starring:	Colin Farrell, Angelina Jolie, Val Kilmer, Anthony Hopkins, Jared Leto, Rosario Dawson
MPAA Rated:	R
Released By:	Warner Bros.
Release Date:	11/24/2004
Directed By:	Oliver Stone
Produced By:	Moritz Borman, Jon Kilik, Thomas Schühly, Iain Smith, Oliver Stone

Quite honestly I’ve forgotten about the story of Alexander. I mean, that was back in high school, so many moons ago, and really, do I care? Should I care? I guess there’s always that theory of we need to study history so we don’t repeat it, but should that take place on the big screen. I guess, sure, why not, but as great as a filmmaker Oliver Stone is, can we always believe his historical accounts? Who cares, this movie’s got Angelina Jolie, who hopefully will wear some revealing outfits, so I suppose I’m there.

Alrighty, so Alexander, played by Colin Farrell, is a great warrior and conqueror in a time when one really could be a great warrior and conqueror. He’s got his problems with his parents, always trying to please them, and why would a great warrior get married to anyone when he can get anyone when he’s out conquering the world, but I guess he could do worse than Roxanne (Rosario Dawson). Things aren’t always easy for a world conqueror, and the movie will most likely show this, but you can expect grand sets, giant battles, and another epic film which will probably go down as “is it better than ‘Troy?’”

Oliver Stone can probably make an epic movie as good as anyone, so this should be a winner, just probably don’t take the story as totally true.

That’s it for this preview! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

Alex & Emma

MPAA Rated – PG-13
It’s 1:36 Long
A Review by:
– The Dude on the Right

Alex & Emma Movie Stats & Links
Starring:	Luke Wilson, Kate Hudson, Sophie Marceau
MPAA Rated:	PG-13
Released By:	Warner Bros.
Kiddie Movie:	Girls might like the love story, or just won’t get it.
Date Movie:	Guys, it’s only an hour and a half. Indulge her as long as she lets you see “The Hulk.”
Gratuitous Sex:	One pretty serious scene, but no nudity.
Gratuitous Violence:	The dudes threatening to kill Alex, but you really don’t believe them.
Action:	Nah.
Laughs:	A few.
Memorable Scene:	None.
Memorable Quote:	None.
Directed By:	Rob Reiner
Produced By:	Elie Samaha, Rob Reiner, Alan Greisman, Jeremy Leven, Todd Black

It’s not that I thought “Alex & Emma” sucked, it just seemed to lack a knockout punch, or at least a decent round, to get you wrapped up in the story. It’s almost too cutesy, and once again we get a romantic comedy that pretty much shows women are suckers for groveling men.

Alex (Luke Wilson) has a problem. He’s gambled away his book advance and now owes some Cubans a bunch of cash. He’s got 30 days to finish writing his book so he can get the rest of the advance money so he can pay back the Cubans and not get dead. What does Alex do? Well, he calls a company that sends out stenographers, pretends he works at a law firm, and Emma (Kate Hudson) appears on his doorstep. So here is this woman, on the doorstep of an apartment that makes some slums look like palaces, accepting a job from a guy who says he won’t be able to pay her until the end of 30 days when the book is finished. It seems he wants to dictate the book and have her type it up. Alright, so the initial premise is farfetched, but then comes the rest of the movie.

As Alex is dictating his novel, Emma is always one to chime in with her opinion. Now sometimes this opinion is alright, but mostly it just stops Alex and makes him explain approach to writing a novel. Quickly we are able to see that Alex is telling a story similar to his love life now, except set in 20’s. This is never more apparent than his continuing changing of one of the characters in his story, the au pair, from a bouncy Sweden to a bossy German to a swinging Spaniard, and finally to the sensible Anna. Pretty much the Emma is Anna.

So while Alex is dictating his story, we get movie bits of his novel starring none other than Emma as the au pair and Alex as Adam Shipley, the dude in the story who loves two women. But where is the other woman in Alex’s life? Well, low and behold she shows up to really make Alex’s novel end exactly as he wrote it, as his publisher calls it, bittersweet, because the Adam loses both women.

But can a romantic comedy end on a bittersweet note? No way in hell. As you can easily calculate, even though Emma now seems to hate Alex, well, somehow there will be a twist to get them together in the end.

The movie is totally calculated from beginning to end. We never get a sense of urgency based on Alex’s 30 days to being dead plot, pretty much all Kate Hudson is good at is smiling (but I will admit it is a beautiful smile) and acting goofy, and if you saw Luke Wilson as the movie portrays him, I doubt you would buy him as a romantic comedy writer. It is for these reasons that my only recommendation for “Alex & Emma” is to wait for it as a rental. Guys, you might have to take your lady to this in order to make up for dragging her to “The Hulk,” but be thankful it’s only about an hour and a half long. It’s okay, but in the realm of romantic comedies there is nothing in this one to really remember. 2 stars out of 5 for “Alex & Emma.”

That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

The Alamo

MPAA Rated – PG-13
It’s 2:17 Long
A Preview by:
– The Dude on the Right

The Alamo Movie Stats & Links
Starring:	Dennis Quaid, Maurice Ripke, Billy Bob Thornton, Jason Patric, Patrick Wilson, Emilio Echevarría
MPAA Rated:	PG-13
Released By:	Touchstone Pictures
Release Date:	4/9/2004
Directed By:	John Lee Hancock
Produced By:	Brian Grazer, Ron Howard, Mark Johnson

Umm, the movie tells the story of the big old battle at The Alamo, as well as some other battles down in Texas. It’s a little early for wondering if this could be a big old action film, but the trailer does show some promise and with the likes of Billy Bob Thornton, Brian Grazer, and Ron Howard attached to it, well, that adds a little more potential.. I’ll write more about this one as we get closer to April.

That’s it for this preview! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!