Author: Andy Labis

Have You Posted a Review in an App Store?

I have a few apps in the Apple app store. For a shameless plug, head to the App Store and check them out. It’s kind of a hobby. Some people collect stamps, others go bowling (That went away for me with my “bowler’s knee” as I call it), while I play around with some iPhone app development. I am a geek, I suppose.

I only bring this up because I’m also a fan of apps, and a fan, usually, of when apps get updated, but it always boggles my mind when updating, or rather full redesigns occur, and there doesn’t seem to be any real testing of the core features of the app, or understanding the repercussions of changing an app. One app I regularly use is called Remember the Milk, and about a year ago they did a full redesign. I originally didn’t like the redesign, but much like Facebook changing things, if it’s something we use all of the time, and we like the core concept, we’ll get used to it, and eventually I got over it and am still a fan of the app. The thing was, in the end, it worked like it was supposed to.

There were updates to two app recently that for whatever reason I keep following the slew of 1 star comments on. The first is for a local grocery store, Jewel-Osco, that recently changed ownership. Their old app had a function where you could reorder your prescription, which I guess was easier than using the automated phone feature, but what do I know because my prescription is on auto-refill so they just call me every month and say my pills are ready. The new app took away the prescription reordering feature and people are livid. Comments of the app being useless now, comments of why they changed it, comments of they suck, and out of 52 ratings there are 2 at five stars, 1 at three stars, 1 at two stars, and 48 at one star of people upset they can’t refill their pills any longer with the app.

The other app I regularly use is called OverDrive Media Console. It’s used mostly to read digital version of library books. They, too, recently did a full re-design of their app, and again, people don’t like it. Sure, there are some that don’t like the new look, although most see to be able to get over it. The problem with their redesign is that this is one they didn’t seem to do much testing on as some of the core functionality that was present in the old version, namely touching the end of the screen to change a page, or the page changing at a relatively normal speed, are gone. Complaints about slow page turning, about having to “swipe” to turn the page which then sometimes causes the sidebar to appear instead of turning the page, and about how audiobook listening is practically non-functional, among others, seem to be the majority of the complaints. The interesting thing I find, though, is that the OverDrive folks seem to have a slew of people posting questionable reviews because along with the 81 ratings of one star, pretty much saying the new version sucks, there are 47 votes of five stars with reviews stating that this is the best app, ever.

I’m not sure why, but things like this fascinate me.

I get a few reviews for my apps. Nothing crazy, some people like them, some don’t, but I always do my best to at least make sure any revisions are functional, and test updates on everything from my iPhone version 1 to the latest one out there just to know how slow/fast/if things work things are. Sometimes, though, I think testers are only on the latest and greatest device and forget that there are thousands of users still on older devices, and they are probably going to piss them off. Now, I haven’t submitted any ratings for apps, nor reviews, although I am tempted to write one for the OverDrive app as I’m having the same problem as the 81 people who now hate the app, but with my thought to post a review, I plight: Have you posted a review in an app store?

That’s it for this plight! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

 

To The Wonder

MPAA Rated – R
It’s 1:53 Long
A Review by:
– The Dude on the Right

To The Wonder
Movie Stats & Links
Starring: Ben Afleck, Olga Kurylenko, Rachel McAdams, Javier Bardem
MPAA Rated: R
Released By: Magnolia Home Entertainment
Release Date: August 6, 2013
Kiddie Movie: They’d be bored. Send them to bed.
Date Movie: They’d also be bored. Send them to bed.
Gratuitous Sex: It’s got some.
Gratuitous Violence: Neil and Marina get in some fights.
Action: Nope.
Laughs: Nope.
Memorable Scene: Only memorable because there was so much of it: The frolicking.
Memorable Quote: None.
Directed By: Terrence Malick
On the Blu-Ray: You get some “Making of…”, Actors stuff, dancing stuff, and some other extras.

As I was watching “To The Wonder,” all I could keep thinking was that had Neil (Ben Affleck) just bought some furniture for his house, maybe he wouldn’t have had all of the problems with his new love, Marina (Olga Kurylenko). Okay, I was also trying to think of something nice to say about the film.

I guess I’ll start with the story…

For “To The Wonder” we get Neil. He’s in France and meets a beautiful woman, Marina, and her daughter. They fall in love, and what does Marina do? Of course she pulls up stakes and moves to Oklahoma. Yes, the wonders of Paris to Oklahoma. Does anyone actually think the couple would have a chance at succeeding? As the movie plays out we get to see a happy couple, a couple who isn’t so happy, a happy couple, a couple who isn’t so happy, a dude going to work and testing soil or something, a couple who isn’t so happy, and a priest who seems confused. Oh, yea, did I mention there is also a priest, Father Quintana (Javier Bardem), who seems to have lost his faith and is somehow part of the movie, but doesn’t seem to play that big a role?

Yes, the movie is about love and all of its factors, but it’s also a movie that seems to show there is no chance at love, at least for the two main characters, and it’s an artsy film about love, with a lot of Marina frolicking through the fields of Oklahoma, a lot of Marina dancing around in ballet moves, even Rachel McAdams as Jane, Neil’s old girlfriend, coming into the picture and she’s spinning and frolicking. All along it also seems like a great role for Ben Affleck as he seemed to have relatively few lines to learn with most of the commentary by Marina in French (Yup, that means you’ll also spend a lot of the movie reading it), as well as Father Quintana commentarying in Spanish (again, more reading for you, the viewer).

Yes, there are people who will like this movie, just not me, and definitely not my wife as, when it ended, she pretty much wanted to give it zero stars for wasting her time. Me, I’m not so critical, seeing some of the artsy ways the movie was working, but even for me, and I can normally try to appreciate an art-house type of film, even this one had me saying things like “Again with the dancing,” and while looking at the interior of Neil’s place wondering why he just doesn’t let Marina do some shopping for some furniture. There are other, better movies about love, I would give this one about 2 stars, but I’ll average things with my wife and end up with 1 star out of 5 for “To The Wonder.” I guess the key if you will like the movie is knowing what to expect, so if you expect frolicking, talking, and reading (unless you understand French and Spanish), you might like it, but for most everyone else you might just wonder how Ben Affleck became involved.

That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

Are Smartphones Getting Too Big?

Back in the day I managed a Radio Shack in lovely Rantoul, IL. It was a nice store, near the Chanute Air Force Base that was eventually closed, and at the time cell phones weren’t small. Yes, they sold a truly portable phone, but down there in the country cell phone towers weren’t nearly as prevalent as they are today, and whenever someone came in hoping to buy the small phone I had to tell them that most of the time the phone wouldn’t work, the cell phone signal was too week, so in order to have the protection and convenience a cell phone could give they really needed to have a bag phone. They were sad. They wanted small. They wanted something they could put in their pocket. They wanted cool even if it cost them a few dollars more, and they couldn’t afford it.

Oddly there seems to be a bizarre shift in the cell phone world, back to big, at least you would think so if you check out some of the headlines, especially the latest from USA Today: “New 6.3-inch Samsung phone approaches tablet size.” Yes, the convenience and protection of a cell phone is getting back to needing a bag to carry it with the Samsung Galaxy Mega!

Me, I’m an Apple guy and love the fact that they haven’t gone crazy with trying to make a phablet, as it would be. Not that they might not in the future, but I like that my phone fits in my pocket and for the larger stuff, i.e the video viewing, book reading, and immersive games, there is the iPad or the iPad Mini. Is it that hard to carry both? While I understand the desire for people to have everything all-in-one as it would be, I also feel there is a convenience factor for the idea of a phone. To me it seems practical enough: It makes calls, I can check email, I can read a book if I really wanted to, I can watch a movie, I can play games, and I can take pictures or video without looking like a doofus holding up what amounts to something the size of a sheet of paper blocking the view of those behind me so I can get a lousy picture of Rick Springfield at the country fair. On that note, I believe there are two kinds of people: Those that use their iPad sized device to take pictures and video, and those that make fun of the people using their iPad sized device to shoot pictures and video.

People made fun of the iPad when it came out, mocking it’s size, pretending to hold it up to their head like an iPhone to make phone calls even though the device wasn’t a phone. Oddly enough some smartphones are getting to be exactly that size, and people will look exactly like those in the pictures when making a call. For me, bigger is not always better, at least in terms of my cell phone. I like the convenience, I like the protection, and I like that it fits in my pocket. So, with that, as the world eagerly awaits Apple to announce their new iPhone 5S and 5C in the coming weeks, the thing we do know is it won’t be a phone the size of a tablet. Maybe Apple is behind the curve on this one and people want an iPad they can hold up to their head, make a phone call, and carry in a bag? I guess retro might really be in this year! Welcome back, bag phone!

Alright, enough rambling, let’s get to the plight: Are smartphones getting too big?

That’s it for this plight! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

Have You Used a Dot Matrix Printer Before?

Last weekend was the Air and Water Show in Chicago. This year I took a pass, although I have been to a few in the past, and I will always say that the best day, as long as the weather is nice, is on the Friday before, for the practice show, which is really just a dry-run of the full show. Alas, though, this year, thanks to the government sequester, government funding for cool stuff, like the Air Force Thunderbirds and Navy Blue Angels, has been cut, and therefore those acts were cut from the show. Most people still say the show was fun, but I’m guessing it just wasn’t the same as there is something about the jets that is just awesome.

But what does this have to do with a dot matrix printer?

Well, let me tell you.

In the week leading up to the Air and Water Show the local newscasts all have some kind of special interest story about the show. In the past there is always some reporter allowed to tag along with the Thunderbirds or Blue Angels, and they try not to barf in the cockpit, but without the big boys this year the news folks were relegated to talking about, well, the boring acts, or at least the “Not as exciting as barfing in the cockpit” acts. As I was watching the report, they were interviewing a guy from the Geico Skytypers, and the gentleman was explaining how skytyping is different from skywriting, in that for skywriting you have one plane doing loops and fun things drawing words and figures in the sky, but for skytyping they can do a lot more like spell out the word “Geico” and draw a flag. Okay, he didn’t really say the part about the flag, I picked that up from their website, but the thing he did mention is that skytyping is like printing things on a dot matrix printer, to which I instantly thought, “How many kids, who, well, might actually be watching the news, just said ‘Dad, what’s a dot matrix printer?'”

Me, I remember the dot matrix printer, trying to feed ribbon in the printer, and how noisy they were no matter how many things you tried to use to muffle the sound, but in this era of the inkjet (based on the same concept of the dot matrix), and the laser printer, I’m wondering, and so I’m plighting: Have you used a dot matrix printer before?

That’s it for this plight! I’m The Dude on the Right!! Bring back the Thunderbirds and Blue Angles!!! L8R!!!

Have You Ever had Apple Pie and Cheddar Cheese Together?

Over the weekend I was introduced to a combination I thought had no chance of working, apple pie and cheddar cheese. I’m not sure why, but in my head it just seems weird, but I was assured it would be tasty. With dinner complete, and a slight rest for some movie watching, it was time now for dessert, and I was presented with a small plate with a slice of apple pie, some small, slices of cheddar cheese on the side, and of course a scoop of ice cream. I was instructed to take a forkful of the apple pie, bite off a piece of the cheese, and eat it together. Now, as I’m a speed-eater, I had to be reminded as I took the forkful of apple pie that I was to eat them together and not just swallow the pie and then eat the cheese, so I did what I was told and low and behold, some interesting tastiness erupted in my mouth.

I’m not good at describing culinary tastes so I’m not going to try to expand with something like “The sharpness of the cheddar complimented the sweetness of the apple pie, nicely.” or “The flakiness of the crust combined with the chewiness of the cheese created a glop of a tasty blob in the mouth.” Instead I’m going with “It was tasty!”

So, my recommendation for the next time you have apple pie is to have a block of sharp, cheddar cheese on hand, and with your mouthful of pie, eat some cheese. You might be surprised. And yes, the ice cream was good, too!

It sounds like a weird combination, and as I can now answer “Yes. It was tasty!”, I’ve got to plight: Have you ever had apple pie and cheddar cheese together?

That’s it for this plight! I”m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

Are You a Fan of “Duck Dynasty?”

So the other day I ask around, “What day is it?” Yes, it was a Wednesday, and I’m a fan of the camel on the Geico commercial, and most people responded with exactly what I was looking for, “Hump day!” I say most because one person didn’t want to play along with my “talking camel appreciation” so they posted about it not being Friday, and that it was also “Duck Dynasty” day. Other than seeing merchandising in the store, seeing the family on some country music special the other day, spotting their books on the New York Times Best Sellers list, and somehow not going by a day without hearing something about “Duck Dynasty,” I must admit I have never seen the show, nor did I know it was “Duck Dynasty” Day.

But it seems a lot of people did. 11.8 million people as a matter of fact.

Sure, 11.8 million sounds like a lot of people, and for cable it’s huge, heck, for TV it’s pretty big I suppose, the largest audience ever for a cable reality show, or I guess non-fiction series if we want to be specific, and then the article gets into a lot of demographic info saying how it’s almost bigger than the old “John and Kate” show in one age group, and it’s now bigger than “Trading Spaces” (I must admit I was a huge Spaces fan, up until they started re-tooling it, but what else is new?) in another age group. The scary part is that this group of Duck people, well, they would probably be eclipsing the latest “American Idol” ratings if the show was on normal TV as I’m sure there are people who would love to check it out, but couldn’t find A&E on their cable system if they wanted to.

I won’t be watching “Duck Dynasty” anytime soon, not that I’m not interested, but it just doesn’t fit into my viewing schedule right now. I do wonder, though, and I plight: Are you a fan of “Duck Dynasty?”

That’s it for this plight! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

Are You a Dishwasher Re-Arranger?

The dishwasher. It’s a nice appliance, one that I didn’t have growing up as we, the children, were the dishwashers some of the time, or Mom was the rest of the time. We also didn’t do the “drying the dishes after washing them’ thing as we had the lovely rack for the other half of the sink, the one where you can pile the dishes about three feet high to dry, and then, as a kid, instead of putting the dishes away, would fish out the bowl from the bottom of the pile for a bowl of cereal even if there was a clean one in the cupboard. I was, however, always fascinated by the clear dishwasher they would have in the appliance section at Sears, and always wanted to just stop and watch it for a while, but my parents would never let me.

It wasn’t until my fraternity days in college that I first had a dishwasher, but even then it was an industrial machine, made of stainless steel with a heater that didn’t really work right, and then, finally, at my first apartment, there it was, a normal dishwasher!

The thing was, since I lived by myself, at first I didn’t use it that much, still relying on the old “rack in the sink” thing for the longest time, until, really, I ended up in my townhouse and realized you could just keep putting dirty dishes in the dishwasher, and then maybe once or twice a week have to turn it on. Getting married, though, the “leaving the dirty dishes until full” thing stopped, and I also came to realize that there are two kinds of dishwasher people: The “load the dishwasher appropriately” people, and the “load the dishwasher all willy-nilly” kind. I will say that I am the latter, and will venture to say that my wife (and she may not agree) is the “willy-nilly” kind.

With that, though, I will fully admit that I’m a dishwasher re-arranger. I don’t know if it’s my engineering background, I don’t know if it’s because I like to solve puzzles, or I don’t know if it’s because I figure someone designed those plate holders a certain way for maximum cleaning efficiency that we should load the dishwasher a certain way, but rarely a day goes by when I don’t move at least one plate/bowl/glass that my wife puts in the dishwasher and put it someplace else that I feel is more appropriate for plate/bowl/glass cleanliness. If the dishwasher is getting full, and it looks like that bowl won’t fit, I’m in there moving a glass from here to there, shifting a plate to the other side, and somehow doing my best to make it all fit. My wife will put a baking dish in one way – I’ll move it. She’ll put a glass on one side of the rack – I’ll move it to the other side. I’ll fill the dishwasher properly, and she, well, I love her. I know my re-arranging drives her crazy sometimes, but I can’t help it, re-arranging the dishwasher, I fear, will always be a part of me.

It was in one of my last dishwasher re-arranging episodes that I wondered a lot about this, and so I plight: Are you a dishwasher re-arranger?

That’s it for this plight! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

Do You Fold Your Underwear?

In keeping with my “things I think men do” theme that I sort of had with my “Have You Ever “Vacuumed” a Couch?” plight from the other day, this one is inspired by my wife who, the other day, upon emptying the dryer filled with some of my clothes, folded my underwear. She didn’t iron them, but there they were, nicely folded on the bed and ready to be nicely placed in their respective drawer. It was difficult for me putting them in the drawer neatly as I didn’t really want to dishevel them after she put so much work into the folding, so I gently put them in the drawer, thus preserving the neatness.

Here’s the thing. I never fold my underwear. It comes out of the dryer, I separate it from the socks, and then just shove it in the underwear drawer, squishing things around so they all fit, and I can close the drawer. Sometimes I’ll even rotate the underwear, taking the garments from the bottom out of the drawer, putting the freshly cleaned underwear not on the bottom, and put the ones that were now on the bottom on the top of the pile.

As things go, as I was putting the folded underwear in the drawer, I couldn’t help but think about the folding of underwear, and so I plight: Do you fold your underwear?

That’s it for this plight! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

Is it Wrong to Think “Boogity, Boogity, Boogity!” before Saying “Amen”?

Last week a buddy of mine on Facebook was in a posting mood and for most of his musings he was finding a “shmoyoho” songified video (Gun control), or the “Ain’t Nobody Got Time For That” Sweet Brown classic to go with a thought. It was the “Smash, Smash, Smash” post, however, that spurred me to finally chime in and defend Justin Bieber, and also link to one of my favorite auto-tuned clips, namely Pastor Joe Nelms giving a prayer at a NASCAR race, where he so lovingly comments about his “smokin’ hot wife,” and liked to proclaim “Boogity, boogity, boogity! Amen!”

As it is quite a catchy tune, and having watched it again just before going to church, I couldn’t help but find myself humming it, whistling it, and all around annoying my wife with it on the way to mass. Then, as the service was going on, I was, in my head, trying to fit “Boogity, boogity, boogity!” into my thoughts prior to every time I said “Amen!” I thought to myself how much more enjoyable a mass would be should we change the proper response from a plain, ol’ “Amen,” to now including the “boogity,” but then I thought maybe I should head right to the confessional as, when I get to The Pearly Gates, there would be St. Peter, and I would either be met with him humming and smiling along, and welcoming me in, or cursing me for getting the song stuck in his head and pointing me in the other direction.

Alas, as mass was ending, and not really wanting to annoy our Pastor with the question, I simply decided to plight: Is it Wrong to Think “Boogity, boogity, boogity!” before saying “Amen”?

That’s it for this plight! I’m The dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

Hatchet III

MPAA Rated – Unrated
It’s 1:21 Long
A Review by:
– The Dude on the Right

Hatchet III
Movie Stats & Links
Starring: Kane Hodder, Danielle Harris, Zach Galligan, Caroline Williams
MPAA Rated: Not rated.
Released By: Dark Sky Films
Blu-Ray Release Date: August 13, 2013
Kiddie Movie: Only if you want to turn them into a psycho killer, or a horror film director.
Date Movie: If she’s a fan of over-the-top gore.
Gratuitous Sex: Sadly, no.
Gratuitous Violence: Lots and lots.
Action: There is a little chasing, but not that much.
Laughs: In the over-the-top horror vein.
Memorable Scene: I don’t know why, but I loved the rocket launcher scene.
Memorable Quote: “And that’s the only reason those aren’t my balls hanging from that tree!”
Directed By: BJ McDonnell
Cool Things About the Blu-ray: The extras are actually well-done. Not too long, and pretty interesting to see how some of the things are done.

“And eventually the hatcheting starts and Victor Crowley stomps on a head.”

I scribbled that in my notes after I became a little worried watching “Hatchet III.” Fine, there was the opening scene with Victor Crowley and Marybeth, and sure, there was Marybeth, covered in blood at the police station, but for a brief moment I was worried that the folks making “Hatchet III” failed to read the title of their own movie. Low and behold, my worry ceased, any disappointment was gone, and Victor Crowley was back to his good ol’ self, hatcheting away, and we had a wonderfully bloody end to a trilogy of gory goodness.

I’d say the story for “Hatchet III” doesn’t really matter, but for this movie it sort of does as it’s not just a gore-fest, but actually does a nice job in giving the final answers as to why Victor Crowley can’t be killed by normal means, why he can be cut in half and still come back to massacre (And if you think I’m giving anything away, oh, please!), and what needs to be done to finally put him to rest. The story revolves around Marybeth (Danielle Harris), hell-bent on killing Victor (Kane Hodder), and how she seems to do the job, finds herself happily locked up on jail for doing so, and Sheriff Fowler (Zach Galligan – Yes, that Zach Galligan from “Gremlins”) and his boys investigating the bloodbath Marybeth told them about. Low and behold Amanda (Caroline Williams) enters the picture explaining to a deputy and Marybeth that Victor isn’t really dead, and when the screams start coming over the radio it’s off to the person holding the key to getting rid of Victor.

In the meantime, well, the SWAT team and the sheriff’s crew are stuck in the swamp with Victor, and of course things don’t go so well. We find that Victor has a thing for testicles, we find that it really isn’t that easy to aim a rocket launcher, and when our heroine finally shows back up, if she would have just listened to the crotchety lady she could have save a couple of lives, especially after a tender, touching moment towards the end of the film between Amanda and Victor.

The one thing really missing from “Hatchet III,” especially in the realm of the horror genre, was blatant nudity, and I was even watching the “uncut and unrated” version. The gore was top-notch, the story told enough without boring you too, and the people are generally stupid. Heck, I even really liked the “Hatchet III: Behind the Scenes,” and I rarely like extras on Blu-ray. But the lack of gratuitous sex and/or nudity, that hurt the movie for me, especially when, for the original “Hatchet,” on the extras, Adam Green, the writer for the “Hatchet” trilogy, says “If I’m not going to see some nudity and some gore, don’t waste my time.” I know Adam didn’t direct this one, but I’m sorry, Marybeth getting hosed down in the slammer didn’t cut it.

You will get most of what you would expect for a movie called “Hatchet III,” especially as a viewer of the previous two, but in terms of homage to the great films, the lack of boobs was bad, and I sadly have to drop my rating a star. I was heading to a 4 star review, but I’ve got to stick with some rating morals and drop “Hatchet III” to a 3 star out of 5 movie. The gratuitous violence just wasn’t enough to overcome the lack of gratuitous nudity.

The extras on the Blu-ray will probably be fun for the fans. Like I said, I did enjoy the “Hatchet III: Behind the Scenes,” and the “Raising Kane” feature was nice. Yes, you get some commentary stuff, too, for those so inclined.

I good gore-fest, but I’m still wondering if the nudity ended up on the cutting room floor.

That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!