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August 31, 2006

What's New? More of the Dude's CD's: Richie Sambora from Bon Jovi, and The Nerds.

The Dude on the Right is still, and this will probably become a long "still," trying to review, or at least give a quick review, of all of the CD's he has. Two more are posted, both which he loves. One is from a band called The Nerds, a band he first saw at Joe Pops in New Jersey. That CD is "Poultry in Motion." The other is "Stranger in This Town" from this dude named Richie Sambora. You might know his name if you pay attention to the tabloids, but you probably know him more from his playing guitar in Bon Jovi. Yea, he's that dude.

The Dude on the Right would still love to see Richie Sambora, doing his stuff, at a small, blues bar, and he would probably even pay for it. So, Richie, if you do a solo jaunt, The Dude on the Right would love to review it.

Posted by Rightdude at 8:40 PM | Comments (0)

August 28, 2006

What's New? Stu & The Dude's Weekend Wrap-Up: Thomas the Tank Engine, The Shatner Roast, The Dude is an Idiot, and "Beerfest."

For this podcast of "Stu & The Dude's Weekend Wrap-Up," Stu gives his advice for seeing Thomas the Tank Engine, and The Dude tells Stu about boobies during "Beerfest," missing "Invincible," and his favorites at the "William Shatner Roast."

Posted by Rightdude at 8:13 PM | Comments (0)

August 27, 2006

I Drive Myself Crazy, I Saw "Beerfest," and I Remember Some Things about College.

By: The Dude on the Right
Sometimes I drive myself nuts.  Case in point was this morning.

So this morning I got up a little later than normal because I was up the night before a little later than normal.  Driving to get my #2 breakfast with a large Diet Coke for $4.04, I was debating on seeing another movie today, namely "Invincible," or skipping the film, even though I did want to see it, and use the extra time to working on the animation for our next "Stu & The Dude" episode of "Snakes on a Plane."  My decision was to skip the movie.  So I got back home, reading my Sunday paper and enjoying my breakfast, with "Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban" on the TV.  I finish reading the paper, breakfast was done, but there I sat, on my couch, missing a new movie and spending most of the time I should have been animating by watching Harry Potter get his ass kicked by the Dementors.  Needless to say our "Snakes on a Plane" review isn't done yet.

But I did see "Beerfest," and it was okay, pretty much most of what I expected, although it did have one flaw because anyone who has tried to drink out of a yard glass would know that the secret to "Das Boot" is rotating the glass, or so I'm told.  The movie also had me recall some college memories where I was a kickass "Thumper" player.  There are a couple of secrets to being a kickass "Thumper" player, but those will rest me me.  I was never good at the chugging thing, couldn't open my throat, and I preferred to consider myself a distance drinker, able to just hang out on the roof of the fraternity house waiting for the sun to rise.  I suppose being good at drinking games is good in one respect, because you don't get as drunk, but being good at drinking games is bad in another respect, because you don't get as drunk, which is really the goal of most drinking games.  What a dilemma.  In Kamikaze Checkers, however, there is no winner, although it does lead to laughing your ass off when it precedes Jesse Jackson reading "Green Eggs and Ham" during Saturday Night Live, or so I'm also told.

Well, enough reminiscing and probably giving my mom some chest pains about my college days, it's back to some animating and watching the Emmy Awards.

Thanks for reading!

That's it for this one!  I'm The Dude on the Right!!  L8R!!!

Posted by Rightdude at 7:10 PM | Comments (0)

What's New? A Movie Review of "Beerfest."

For this movie review of "Beerfest," The Dude on the Right found it better than "Club Dread" but not as good as "Super Troopers." Pretty much he says the movie gives you exactly what you can expect from the trailer.

Posted by Rightdude at 7:07 PM | Comments (0)

August 25, 2006

My Singing a Song, My New Kids, and is "Criticize" a Synonym for "Lynch?"

By: The Dude on the Right
Just a couple of quick things to blog about while I take a break from animating our "Snakes on a Plane" review...

If you listened to my latest podcast you already know about my latest dilemma, but in case you didn't listen, I wrote what I think is a cute parody song concerning the demise of Pluto, but right now it isn't the criticism of the funniness of the song that is stopping me from recording it, but the making fun of my singing by everyone in internet-land, especially by those of my immediate family.  I suppose I should just suck it up since I know I'm no Pavarotti, or even Weird Al.  We'll see how the weekend goes if "The Dude on the Right's" singing debut goes public.

It was also an exciting week in The Dude household as I'm a new dad (sorry mom for telling you this way)!  Ever since Bill's passing last December, my other two "kids," Steve and Ashley, just haven't been the same.  I think they are too young to understand the concept of death, but they seemed to always sense that someone was missing from their home.  And so, needing a replenishment of snails and crabs, and since my fish tank seems to have stabilized after my last cleaning debacle, I decided it was time for Steve and Ashley to get some new siblings.  I could have replaced Bill with another Bill, but decided on something different on the swimming side, and also added a couple of starfish.  I'm trying not to get too attached to them right now, waiting to make sure they end up nicely adapting to their new home before dying on me, and so they don't have names yet, although one of them is close to being called either Bam, Betty, or Becky.  I don't have pictures yet, either, because they are still kinda skittish about coming out in the open.  One of the starfish, as it is want to do, also just likes to bury itself in the sand, so my only hint it is still alive is that the sand looks to move.  More on my growing family at a later date.

And finally, I don't want to give my commentary on this right now, other than I found it interesting and odd, but one of the sport's talk radio stations pointed out something very interesting about a quote by Cubs' Manager Dusty Baker as printed in the Chicago Tribune.  I'm listening to "The Boers and Bernstein Show" on The Score here in Chicago yesterday, and they pointed out that while Dusty was discussing pitch counts, the Tribune wrote "Baker pointed to Greg Maddux's high pitch counts early in his career, claiming Maddux had thrown 167 pitches in one start.  'If I left somebody out there 167 pitches, you'd [criticize] me,' Baker said."  You might be saying something like "Fine, so Dusty might have said something like "shit all over me" and the Tribune decided to replace that phrase, in brackets so you knew it wasn't exactly what Dusty said, with "criticize."  Only the boys at The Score played the tape of the interview and what Dusty Baker actually said was "If I left somebody out there 167 pitches, you'd lynch me."

Boers and Bernstein weren't criticizing Dusty Baker's choice of words, they actually had their reasoning for Dusty's using the word "lynch."  Nope, they wondered why the Chicago Tribune, who own the Chicago Cubs, would seem to decide to replace an inflammatory word with one not so inflammatory?  My question is simply in what thesaurus can you find "criticize" as an appropriate replacement for "lynch?"  Nothing in my mind, nor my online source,, comes close.

Anyway, back to animating!  Thanks for reading!

That's it for this one!  I'm The Dude on the Right!!  L8R!!!

Posted by Rightdude at 7:38 PM | Comments (0)

What's New? Should I Sing a Song About Pluto?, MySpace Friends at 10, "Survivor" is Great, and Go See SoaP.

For this podcast, The Dude on the Right laments about the passing of Pluto and wonders if he should sing a song about it. He also loves the twist "Survivor" is putting on the new season, and is always looking for more MySpace friends.

Posted by Rightdude at 6:00 PM | Comments (0)

August 22, 2006

What's New?: Stu & The Dude's Weekend Wrap-Up: Missing the Steve & Garry Reunion, A Song for Stu, and Some "Accepted" Talk.

For this podcast of "Stu & The Dude's Weekend Wrap-Up," The Dude on the Right discusses his reason for missing the live broadcast of the Steve Dahl and Garry Meier's on-air reunion, and also talks a bit about "Accepted." Meanwhile Stu wonders a bit about block-party etiquitte and really doesn't like a song by The Playmates. The Dude on the Right also tries to justify to Stu why he should be a guest reviewer on the "Ebert & Roeper Show." Get well soon, Roger.

Posted by Rightdude at 7:36 PM | Comments (0)

August 20, 2006

What's New? A Movie Review of "Accepted."

For this movie review of "Accepted," The Dude on the Right thinks that the potential was there for this to be near-classic in the college movie genre, but has absolutely no chance by being rated PG-13.

Posted by Rightdude at 5:17 PM | Comments (0)

August 19, 2006

"Snakes on a Plane" was Great, and I Missed a Live Viewing of the Steve Dahl & Garry Meier "Reunion."

By: The Dude on the Right
I'm a little torn right now because part of me wants to do a full movie review of "Snakes on a Plane," but since Stu Gotz and I decided that it will be our next episode of "Stu & The Dude Reviewin' the Movies for You," I've got to hold off a tad on my full opinion, but if you know me, you can probably guess that, awe, screw it, I give it 5 stars out of 5.  The purported re-shoots did what they were supposed to do, namely add the gratuitous nudity, Samuel L. Jackson being able to swear, and some kick-butt snakes killing humans in way-creative ways.  It was exactly what I wanted and more, but even more comes when Stu and I do our reviewin' which will be posted some time next week.

I'm also a little bummed right now because of something I didn't do yesterday, yesterday being Friday, August 18th.  A few years ago I found the secret to seeing the Chicago Air & Water Show, and that was to go and see it during the practice on Friday.  Full show, a lot less people.  But the weather was a little iffy, and I had some consulting obligations to take care of since I was in Ohio the previous Monday, so I opted to skip the Friday practice.  Originally my plan would have been to take the camera gear, have a nice day at the beach, but it didn't happen.  Sure, that's not really something to bum you out, especially since the weather wasn't that great, but in missing not going to the Air & Water Show, I also missed out on witnessing, live, some radio history in Chicago.  For a lot of you this won't mean a damn thing, but yesterday, Steve Dahl and Garry Meier were on the radio, together, again, and it was funny.

Quick history - Steve and Garry were huge in the Chicago market until a falling out between them occurred in 1993 (supposedly a lot about money, and some about Garry getting married).  I had never heard them together, as radio wasn't a big a part of my life back then, but have since become a fan of Steve's, and even of Roe Conn where Garry was also a co-host, but then Garry seemed to make a huge blunder, again, supposedly, a lot about money, and Garry has been out of radio since 2003.  For years lots of radio folks and fans wondered what would happen if Steve and Garry got back together, and yesterday it happened.  Steve Dahl was doing a live broadcast from Oak Street Beachstro, a restaurant at Oak Street Beach in Chicago, where the Air & Water Show also happened to be happening.  As was also happening, Garry Meier happened to be dining at same said Beachstro.  And then it happened.  Steve mentioned he had heard Garry was eating there, and all of a sudden Garry Meier was back on the air with Steve Dahl, and no one could really believe it.  And had I gone to the Air & Water Show practice, I would have been there, camera in hand, to get some photos.  But, like most folks, I just got to listen to their "reunion" in my car, and at home, and even though I thought Garry was okay when he was teamed up with Roe Conn, I could hear how Steve and Garry seemed to have that special chemistry on the radio that doesn't happen often.  Even after all of these years apart, they seemed to gel right back into a radio team, if at least for just a day.

The skeptic in me thinks this reunion might have been planned by a bunch of friends, and the radio folks at WCKG, looking for some ratings boosts after their latest debacle with the departing of Howard Stern.  But part of me really hopes that this reunion was genuine, that Garry Meier was at the Beachstro to have some eats and watch the Air & Water Show, that Steve Dahl just happened to be there to do his broadcast, and somehow, Garry just said "Fuck it.  Maybe it's time to just say 'Hi.'", and Steve was smart enough to let that happen.  No matter the case, it was great radio with Steve & Garry on August 18, 2006.  I'm just a little bummed I wasn't there to see it live. At least I was able to hear it, on my radio, where maybe it was really meant to be heard. I guess I'm really just bummed because I wasn't there to get some pictures.

That's it for this one!  I'm The Dude on the Right!!  L8R!!!

Posted by Rightdude at 7:34 PM | Comments (0)

August 18, 2006

What's New? A CD Review of "Delusions of Grandeur" from Cathy Richardson.

For this CD review of "Delusions of Grandeur" from Cathy Richardson, it took The Dude on the Right a few listens to remember how much he likes Cathy's songs, and even though the CD doesn't rock a lot, he still liked it a lot. It might need a couple of listens to grow on you, but it will grow, if you take the time to listen.

Posted by Rightdude at 8:27 PM | Comments (0)

August 16, 2006

What's New? Rude People in Lorain, OH, Artie Lange in Lorain, and Elvis is Dead.

For this podcast, The Dude on the Right laments about some rude people he has found in his hometown of Lorain, Ohio, is sort of sad he went home last weekend and not the weekend of September 9th when Artie Lange from The Howard Stern Show is actually doing his stand-up comedy act in his hometown. He is also an Elvis person, and he wants to give away a golf shirt.

Posted by Rightdude at 8:23 PM | Comments (0)

August 13, 2006

My Hometown Slogan Should Be: Visit Lorain - It's Like Driving on the Moon!

By: The Dude on the Right
So here it is, Sunday morning in beautiful Lorain, OH, and sure, I should probably be at church or something like that, but “Cocoon” is on the basic cable that my parents subscribe to and I just can’t seem to break away.  Here on an extended weekend to visit the parents, I have found out a few things about my hometown.  First, it seems to have corruption just like Chicago, yet nowhere near the same scale.  I have also found that there seem to be many folks who really don't respect people in wheelchairs, let alone elderly people in wheelchairs.  I know this isn't indicative of all people in the Lorain area, at least I hope not, but I did find it a tad shocking.  I suppose I'll explain more either when I talk to Stu during our weekend wrap-up podcast, or save the specifics for a later blog. 

Lorain also seemed to always have a thing for building their streets out of concrete, instead of concrete with an asphalt surface, and that concrete road is great when the roads are first put in, but not so great 10 to 30 years later when the City doesn't have the money to rebuild the roads, the concrete crumbles, and the patchwork fixes makes it seem like you are driving on the moon.  Mom tells me that a few years ago there were plans to try to set up a roadway fund by making owners of registered vehicles pay for a "City Sticker," much like Chicago and tons of other cities do, but one of the ex-mayors, an older dude, rallied many of the other older folks to defeat the measure (the sticker was supposed to cost like a whole 5 to 10 bucks).  I hope those older folks are happy as they bounce around in their Buick's with suspensions that need a hell of a lot more work than the original 5 or 10 bucks it would have cost them for the sticker.

But enough complaining about Lorain.  It's a great city, really, and would have had the potential to be even greater if the damn horse track and religious nuts long ago hadn't rallied to defeat a measure to put a casino in downtown Lorain.  I would have gladly gone there this weekend and lost a few bucks which might have helped pay for the repair of a sewer catch basin collapse in front of my parent's house that hasn't been fixed in years.

Anyway, although I haven't been able to catch a new movie this weekend (and there weren't many I was excited about anyway), I have been able to catch up on writing all of my movie previews, so those should be posted shortly, and watch a lot of baseball, golf, "Jeopardy," and "Wheel of Fortune."  As much as Mom always says, when I'm sitting our living room, to watch what I want I want, I know she doesn't really mean it.  She really means "Watch something that I'll also want to watch."  Since mom likes baseball, golf, "Jeopardy," and "Wheel of Fortune," that's what I want to watch.

In any case, as much as it is nice to be home, it is always a little weird, and sometimes makes me sad, because Lorain has such potential to be a great town, with its river and lakefront location, but sadly they seem to keep shooting themselves in the foot when it seems they have a chance to take a step forward, and can't even seem to get the corruption to turn the city around, either.

That's it for this one!  I'm The Dude on the Right!!  L8R!!!

Posted by Rightdude at 10:01 AM | Comments (0)

August 8, 2006

Another Haircut, and More Dilemmas. And Is He Gay?

By: The Dude on the Right
If you have been a regular reader of my blog, you might remember that about 2 1/2 months ago I got a haircut that had gone wrong.  I finished that blog with...

As much as "Piercing Girl" is nice on the eyes, I'm thinking it might be nice to talk with Vita again, who's also nice on the eyes, and give her my family update, and see how hers is doing as well.  With getting a haircut from Vita I've got to plan a little bit better in getting said haircut in a little bit better fashion, but I know what I'll get - A decent haircut and comfortable conversation, and isn't that what we are always looking for?  But then again I might just be to lazy and pray I get Piercing Girl the next time around.

Sometimes I'm such an idiot.  Happy Haircutting! ...

It had finally come time for another haircut, which had I actually planned properly I would have made an appointment a couple of weeks ago, and I would have given Vita a call and been able to schedule a decent haircut with comfortable conversation.  But no, I am, sometimes, such an idiot, so with the haircut necessity pressing, I now had a different set of dilemmas.  My first dilemma:  Go back to the same haircut chain place, pray "I've Got Better Tools Girl" isn't there, and I get "Piercing Girl" again.  My other dilemma was that I would get "Perfect Haircut Girl," she would comment about how bad my last haircut was, and I would have to rat out "I've Got Better Tools Girl."  Dilemmas continue:  What if "I've Got Better Tools Girl" is also there, and I get either "Perfect Haircut Girl" or "Piercing Girl," and they asked me who butchered my hair the last time?  Do I rat out "I've Got Better Tools Girl" right in front of her?  And if I did, how would that make the person feel currently sitting in "I've Got Better Tools Girl"'s chair?  So you know what I did?  I went to the same haircut chain, but at a different location, because it was also on my way home, and now I'm just left with one question - Is "Getting Easily Lost Dude" gay?

I walk in the door and the there are two, cute, dudette hair stylists, working on a couple of high school girl's hair, and a dude cutting a little dude's hair.  I have to wait a bit, but it is pretty obvious I'm going to get the dude to cut my hair, and I start to wonder, especially since I had to sit in a chair that had signage blocking the dudettes and I could only see the dude, if he was gay.  I say this because he seemed to have many mannerisms which gay men seem to have, and the "clip-clopping" flip-flops didn't seem to help.  But then I also thought, especially after my last haircut, and seeing the nice job he did on the little dude in the chair, that gay or straight, all this dude seems to want to do is give a decent haircut.  And thanks to "Queer Eye For the Straight Guy," maybe a gay dude cutting your hair does pay a little more attention to making your hair look good rather than some of the old "barbers" who used to cut my hair when I was a youngin', and seemed to think that no matter what age you were, a "bowl cut" was always in style.

So I get in the haircut chair, and for whatever reason, I still wonder if he is gay or not, and then I notice a wedding ring.  Now I'm wondering about the woman who would marry a dude, with him wanting to be a haircut dude, working for a national chain which I'm sure probably doesn't pay that much, and standing by her man.  Then he mentions what he has a house, and is pissed off about the heat wave we have recently had in the Chicagoland area because he has constantly been having to run his air-conditioning.  His small talk also mentions his getting lost with some friends coming back from a wedding in the town I live in, hence the "Getting Easily Lost Dude" moniker I have given him, because, and knowing where he said he was at the time, it's not that easy to get lost.  All the while he seems to be doing a decent job on cutting my hair.

Gay or straight, the "Getting Easily Lost Dude" gave me an okay haircut, seemed to have fixed some of the disasters I have been dealing with since "I've Got Better Tools Girl" cut my hair, but still messed up on cleaning up my sideburns.  I will say it again, "How fucking hard is it to use that clipper thing and keep the sideburns, or in my case, my lack of them, straight!"

I should pledge that for my next haircut I will call Vita with an early enough warning so I can get my expected "decent haircut with comfortable conversation."  She would probably love my stories about getting my hairs cut at these couple of chain places, and the dilemmas I have faced.  But then again, "Getting Easily Lost Dude" didn't do that bad of a job.  Now I have three haircut dilemmas:  Call Vita early enough to get a decent haircut with comfortable conversation.  Go back to the previous national chain location and hope I get "Piercing Girl" with her nice assets.  And finally, go back to the recent national chain and hope I get "Getting Easily Lost Dude" because he did seem to do a decent job on my hair.

I make my life so complicated sometimes.  And this this time it is about getting a haircut.  I am such an idiot.

That's it for this one!  I'm The Dude on the Right!!  L8R!!!

Posted by Rightdude at 8:39 PM | Comments (0)

August 7, 2006

Stu & The Dude's Weekend Wrap-Up: Fun at the Zoo, Fun with SoaP, Not So Much Fun at the Movies, and the "H-Word."

For this podcast of "Stu & The Dude's Weekend Wrap-Up," there's some talk about a zoo and a tram operator, about having fun with the "Snakes on a Plane" website, and The Dude's less-than-stellar movie weekend. They also research the "H-Word." The Dude on the Right also has a MySpace Page, which he isn't really proud of, just happy he has one.

Posted by Rightdude at 8:39 PM | Comments (0)

August 6, 2006

A MySpace Page, and Wondering Why.

By: The Dude on the Right
I did it.  I knew I would because I'm crazy like that some times, but I did it.  I made a MySpace page.  So there I am, at, and I don't really know why.  I even wrote that for my first blog entry over there, because, well, I have a blog here, why do I need a blog there?  I suppose I made it just to have a MySpace page, but I think I also did it as a sort of promotional tool to maybe drive an extra person or two over here to Entertainment Ave!

It was interesting setting up the page because you start to analyze things you want made public, and as a computer nerd, it also re-introduced me to CSS coding, although I haven't utilized any of it yet because at this time it was just enough to get the page done, add some photos, and hope it's not to dorky.  I also found many sites out there that will automatically generate the coding needed to change the layout and color scheme of the page.  Part of that seems like cheating, especially when I would actually like to expand my CSS coding knowledge, but in the end, I'll probably use one of those sites and cheat, knowing that by analyzing how the coding gets manipulated, it will actually help my learning it.  Alright, enough technical workshopping.  If you have a MySpace page, right now I'm looking for friends.  I got two requests to be a friend this morning, one was from some girl with a naked photo of herself on the page, and and the other with a page that had absolutely nothing on it about the person, just looking like she was trolling for friends.  I was going to add the naked girl, but then realized her photo would end up on my "Friend's" list, and felt like adding nudity at this time wouldn't be a good start.

In any case, I'm ready for the bashing I might take from my niece and nephew for the page, but so be it.  I'll survive.

That's it for this one!  I'm The Dude on the Right!!  L8R!!!

Posted by Rightdude at 4:21 PM | Comments (0)

What's New? A Movie Review of "Barnyard."

For this movie review of "Barnyard," The Dude on the Right recommends that you not bring the little kids because they might have some nightmares about coyotes. He also didn't find himself that impressed with the movie, but did enjoy the story.

Posted by Rightdude at 4:13 PM | Comments (0)

August 5, 2006

What's New? A Movie Review of "Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby."

For this movie review of "Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby," The Dude on the Right has found a new actress to stalk, and you might be surprised to find it isn't Leslie Bibb. He was slightly disappointed with the film, but does think it will end up being one of his cable TV favorites.

Posted by Rightdude at 5:34 PM | Comments (0)

August 4, 2006

No MySpace Yet, and Creative "Snakes on a Plane" Marketing.

By: The Dude on the Right
First, in case I confused any of you with my podcast yesterday (sorry sis), don't go looking for a MySpace page for me yet.  It doesn't exist.  My podcast was about my dilemmas of setting one up and the best way to do so to get the least amount of grief from my two biggest critics, my niece and my nephew.  When, and I suppose if, I actually set one up that I think is at least almost niece and nephew proof, you can bet your ass I'll post the link, but until now, it's only a pipe-dream.

But for this blog I wanted to hip you to one of the coolest, "let the fans do all the publicity for us" campaigns I have found in years. And don't go and correct me, because I have found out this has been done before, but never for a movie with as much internet buzz as this, or one I really cared about... 

You might have heard about the upcoming movie "Snakes on a Plane."  It's about, well, snakes, on a plane.  The movie folks have teamed up with another company to, well, I guess the easiest way to put this is, is that you can have Samuel L. Jackson "call" your friends, family, neighbors, or lovers, and "tell" them to go and see the movie "Snakes on a Plane," personalized to fit your said friend, family, neighbor, or lover's lifestyle.  You can also e-mail the audio message to same friends, but that isn't nearly as fun as it might be for the phone call option.   I have already sent some friends and family members the message, and so far my friends have found it very funny.  In any case, if you want to have some fun, head to the "Snakes on a Plane" website and use the "Get a call from Samuel L. Jackson" area, or you can head directly to the Varitalk site and start from there.

Have a good weekend.  It's another busy movie weekend for me, so look for new posting as the weekend goes along, I hope.

That's it for this one!  I'm The Dude on the Right!!  L8R!!!

Posted by Rightdude at 7:48 PM | Comments (0)

August 3, 2006

What's New? Setting Up a MySpace Page Leads to Lots of Dilemmas, and Some WKRP Reminiscing.

For this podcast, The Dude on the Right has many dilemmas about starting his MySpace page, and doesn't really solicit any help, he just doesn't want to look like a total dork when he finally gets his page posted. The Dude also had a laugh at a YouTube clip of the TV show WKRP. Did you know that turkeys don't, well, you'll have to listen.

Posted by Rightdude at 8:45 PM | Comments (0)

August 2, 2006

Four Syllables and Two Words that Equal "Janet Jackson," and "Chicago's Katrina."

By: The Dude on the Right
Maybe it's time I finally just do some investing for our podcasts, and I suppose even my blogs, and just buy a dozen VCR's or TIVO's, so I can start recording all kinds of the funny/bizarre/inane things people say when they are on TV.  My latest case for this happened yesterday when, as I was getting ready to get out of the door, I heard some dude, on the news, proclaim that with the power-outage they were having in the neighborhood, and it being really hot here in Chicago, that this was Chicago's "Katrina."  Hmm?  Let's see?  It was around 7 in the morning, the power went out the night before around 7, and the City of Chicago and ComEd seemed to quickly step-up and start making sure the elderly were cared for, that people were able to get plenty of free water, and, well, you could also find locals stores outside the power outage zone (it's not like it was the entire city), and buy water, in an air-conditioned building.  I have a feeling some actual Katrina survivors would have a few words for this dude, and I wouldn't even hold it against them if they took his free water.

But this blog isn't about my need to invest in the web site, this blog is really about two words, totaling four syllables, and those equating to:

Janet Jackson

Why would I even mention her name when I blame her for the advancement of many of our censorship woes today?  I mention her name because there was a news segment on our local news, that Janet Jackson was in Chicago, promoting something I hope no one buys, and the segment wanted me to just pull out my hair, throw the TV out of the window, and then go outside, watch out for the broken glass, pick-up my TV, bring it back inside, and pray it wasn't broken so I could watch some gratuitous violence, gratuitous laughs, and gratuitous nudity on one of my cable channels.  Or at least be able to watch Howard TV.

But getting back to the news' segment.

So our local station sent a reporter to this press conference of Janet's, and the reporter quickly stated that Janet would answer questions about anything.  Here's what the segment reporter found to be "questions about anything:"

  • A question about the new CD
  • A question about working with Nelly
  • A question about gaining 60 pounds for a movie that was never made and how that felt.
  • A question about how the 40 year old dudette has survived over the years.

I will give these admissions, that the reporter they sent to the press conference isn't one to usually be confrontational, so I don't see her ever asking questions that might be controversial, at least to Janet Jackson.  I also was not present for the press conference, so if someone was there, asking the hard-hitting questions, and Janet Jackson was actually answering "questions about anything," I haven't heard them yet, but here are some of the questions I would have like to have asked her, although I probably would have chickened out in a room full of people and just asked something like "Who influences you in your music today?"  I guess I would be better off sending our crack interviewer, Stu Gotz, to ask questions like:

  • How do you feel knowing that your actions at the Super Bowl have created the excuse the government was looking for to start censoring what we hear and see on radio and television?
  • Janet, this is a multi-part question:  What's with the "Wardrobe Malfunction?"  Who's fault was it, really?  Was it the seamstress?  Was it Justin Timberlake and his incredibly strong forearms?  If you planned it, did you really think that "Star" piercing would suppress the masses about nudity?  And couldn't you have ditched the piercing so we would have seen what most of us have been dreaming to see since that "Rolling Stone" cover many years back?
  • My father always said that women are more sexually mysterious with their clothes on because you have to imagine them naked, so why did you ruin our imaginations by popping out your boob at the Super Bowl?
  • Since the "Wardrobe Malfunction" wasn't your fault, and if your personal seamstress was involved in making your dress at the Super Bowl, or even if not, have you either fired them, or made sure whomever it was, would never work as a seamstress again, because they have ruined, for all of the rest of us, our radio and television viewing pleasure?
  • After you gained about 30 pounds, why didn't you go to these film folks and ask them if you really needed to add another 30 pounds for the film?  And I read that Mariah Carey has gotten your role.  She's got a concert tour coming up, and I don't think she will be gaining 60 pounds anytime soon.  Did they change the role for her?  And why not you?
  • What the hell were you thinking letting Justin grab your boob?  Do you know where his hands have been?

I'm pretty sure, with any of those questions, "Questions about anything" wouldn't really hold up for me, or even Stu, at that press conference.  But for all of these years, and I'm sorry, but unless some person stitching her outfit had it in for everyone, someone really knows why Janet Jackson really had her "Wardrobe Malfunction," and go ahead, call me an idiot, but I still think Janet really knows.  The thing is, that if she really was involved, and she just stepped up and said "I planned it, the TV folks had no idea, because I wanted to make a statement about..." whatever, government censorship might have a few more troubles getting things as laws, and she probably could have spinned the entire incident as a cheerleader for being a daring dudette.  Her actions, for whatever reason, and whomever let/made it happen, our world has changed where people are clamoring for the government to protect our children.  Our government should be there to protect our children in times of war.  Our government should be there to protect our children from criminals.  But it should always be the role of the parent to protect our children from radio and TV by doing one of two things - turning it off or changing the channel.  Sure, the Janet Jackson boob thing happened so fast, so maybe those options don't totally apply, but my parents would have at least had the balls to say something like, if we had even noticed her boob, "grabbing a girls bra isn't appropriate like he did, so don't do that."  Sometimes lessons need to be learned by watching TV, and most of the times, it should be our parents teaching those lessons.

Parents have a job to do, and for the sake of our country, they had better stop trying to make the government do their job.

And Janet Jackson I'm sorry, but until you come totally clean on this issue, I can't support you, or your music projects.

That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

Posted by Rightdude at 9:46 PM | Comments (1)


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