Dr. T & The Women

MPAA Rated – R
It’s 2:02 Long
A Review by:
The Dude on the Right

Dr. T & The Women
Movie Stats & Links
Starring: Richard Gere, Helen Hunt, Farrah Fawcett, Laura Dern, Shelley Long, Kate Hudson, Liv Tyler, Tara Reid
MPAA Rated: R
Released By: Artisan Entertainment
Release Date: 2000
Kiddie Movie: Don’t even think about it.
Date Movie: Don’t go with her, let it be a girl’s night out, unless, of course, you want to see Farrah Fawcett’s boobies.
Gratuitous Sex: Farrah shows her boobs, so does Helen, and there’s some sex going on.
Gratuitous Violence: Nah.
Action: Nah.
Laughs: A couple of chuckles.
Memorable Scene: The ending because it sucked.
Memorable Quote: None.
Directed By: Robert Altman

Alright, dudes, don’t let your dudette take you to see “Dr. T & The Women.” Period. You will see the glowing reviews, you will think it can’t be that bad, and your dudette will want to see it because it looks cute, has Richard Gere, and you made her see “Remember the Titans.” But don’t let her take you. Suggest she get together with her gal-pals and make an evening of it. Then let her come back home and when you say “How was the movie?” have her lie to you and say it was great. How’s that for an opening paragraph?

I almost looked forward to seeing “Dr. T & The Women.” It looked kinda cute and yea, maybe a chick-flick, but I can get in touch with my sensitive new-millennium side for a couple of hours and get a chuckle, but then I started seeing review ratings from critics who usually don’t find a funny movie funny but think an artsy movie is the funniest thing since sliced bread. They found “Dr. T…” a great film and I wished I had spent my hard-earned dough on “Ladies Man.”

“Dr. T & The Women” revolves around Dr. Travis (Richard Gere). He’s a gynecologist in Dallas with an upscale clientele. Yup, rich bitches. His life is quickly falling apart as his older daughter, Dee Dee (Kate Hudson) is planning her wedding. Bad things start happening to him like his wife (still looking good Farrah Fawcett) stripping naked and dancing in a fountain at the mall then getting institutionalized, his clientele getting even more uppity, bad luck on the hunting excursions, cheating on his wife with Bree (Helen Hunt) – well, maybe that’s not a really bad thing, but anyway, just a lot of crap keeps happening to him. His younger daughter Connie (Tara Reid), can’t deal with the wedding happening, and for very good reason, and his office manager nurse has the hots for him but doesn’t really show it. All is going to hell for Dr. T, and that’s just the beginning.

I won’t waste any more time on the story line because, well, other than his life going to shit there isn’t one. Alright, sure there is if you get all artsy and symbolic and like seeing rich people made fun of, but for me I was just a hodgepodge of too many people around Dr. T. Yes, Richard Gere was good in his role, I generally always love Helen Hunt and liked her in this movie too, and Farrah was great in playing the truly spacey wife, but this movie was so damn over the place that in the end I just didn’t care. And, oh yea, then there is the symbolic ending complete with tornado and baby being born. I didn’t need to see it, it just seemed stupid, and I know Robert Altman is one for symbolism and artistic films, but give me his M*A*S*H any day over “Dr. T & The Women.”

You will either think this movie is great or think this movie sucks. I thought it sucked. I’ll give it a star for the acting, give it a star for Farrah getting buck-naked in a fountain, give it a star for Helen Hunt and her somewhat nude scene, but take away a star for the stupid ending. Altman should have skipped the tornado and had Dr. T drive his ruined convertible off of the bridge because his life just hit the total bottom.

Adding the stars it’s 2 out of 5. This film could have been great, it had so much potential, but a potentially good movie gets fucked up by a director just making it too artsy.

That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

American Pie 2

MPAA Rated – R
It’s 1:50 Long
A Review by:
The Dude on the Right

American Pie 2 – DVD Review
Movie Stats & Links
Starring: Jason Biggs, Shannon Elizabeth, Alyson Haningan, Chris Klein, Natasha Lyonne, Eugene Levy, Seann William Scott, Tara Reid, Thomas Ian Nicholas, Eddie Kaye Thomas
MPAA Rated: R
Released By: Universal Home Video
Kiddie Movie: Only if you want to explain why super glue can be funny.
Date Movie: Sure.
Gratuitous Sex: Lots of talk, a nipple or two, unfortunately none of them were Michelle’s nor Vicky’s.
Gratuitous Violence: Maybe shoving a trumpet up someone’s ass, but that’s about it.
Action: Only boys hoping they don’t get caught by potential lesbians.
Laughs: Just like the first movie.
Memorable Scene: Stiffler’s unrequested golden shower as well as Jim playing the trombone.
Memorable Quote: Jim at band camp: “My name is Petey and I have gigantic balls!” and Jim’s Dad: “Don’t forget your penis cream.”
Directed By: J.B Rogers

I’ve got a couple of questions for you. Did you like “American Pie?” You did. You’ll probably like “American Pie 2.” You didn’t like “American Pie?” Don’t rent or buy “American Pie 2.” It’s as simple as that.

So our favorite characters are fresh out of their first year of college and they’re all looking to party for the next three months, as well as get laid, but when the cops bust Stifler’s summer, kick-off party it’s looking like a boring summer. Kevin (Thomas Ian Nicholas), though, is extra bummed because he ran into Vicky (Tara Reid) and again turns to his older brother for advice. The brother’s suggestion – rent a beach house for the summer, work during the day and party every night, and by the end of the summer you’ll have a life revelation. So our boys rent a house and work as painters.

Well, kinda like the first movie all of our characters have their problems. Jim (Jason Biggs) is worried because Nadia (Shannon Elizabeth) is coming to visit and she’s hoping Jim has learned a little control. Jim, though, knows he still doesn’t have what it takes. Then you’ve got Finch (Eddie Kaye Thomas), still in love with Stifler’s mom, learning tantric sex to improve his lovemaking. Oz (Chris Klein) is in general okay but a little worried because Heather (Mena Suvari) is over in Europe. And you know what, screw it, I’m not going to explain to you their problems, I’m sure you’ve got your own, but do you get the jokes like you did in the original? Yes, you get the jokes you expect, you even get some that are a little more gross, and you also get the predictable story you probably want, too.

I won’t ruin any of the jokes, although if you did see the trailer for “American Pie 2” you know what Jim’s masturbation problem is this time. And true to form you get Jim’s Dad (Eugene Levy), perfect as the goofy dad who is a great dad and, well, now seems to just want Jim to sleep with Nadia.

Did our boys grow up any? Yes, but not nearly as much as the girls. Tara looks even better, and Alyson Haningan as Michelle is even more adorable in her slightly annoying way. There are some hilarious scenes, some gross scenes, and some boring scenes, but as sequels go “American Pie 2” does its best to keep you interested in the characters (although some you wonder why some are listed so high on the credits, like Mena who is barely on screen) while still has you looking forward to seeing two women get it on.

The DVD version is full of extras that are actually worth having a DVD player (see “Cool Things About the DVD” below), and it still holds up as a comedy about growing up.

I got what I expected and the DVD stuff was worthwhile, so I’m giving “American Pie 2” 4 stars out of 5. Shannon didn’t get naked this time, although, honestly, she’s lost a couple of notches in my book while Tara moved up a few (she didn’t get naked either), but that doesn’t compare to the extended scene of the two dudettes our heroes think are lesbians.

That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!