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The Hulk
Movie Stats & Links |
| Starring: |
Eric Bana, Jennifer Connelly, Sam
Elliott, Josh Lucas, Nick Nolte |
| MPAA Rated: |
PG-13 |
| Released By: |
Universal Pictures |
| Web Site: |
www.thehulk.com |
| Kiddie Movie: |
Lots of violence
and a dark story. Leave the youngin's at home. |
| Date Movie: |
She might just
wonder if everything on him gets big. |
| Gratuitous Sex: |
Nah, but you do
see Eric's but. |
| Gratuitous
Violence: |
Lots of it, but no
one seems to die. |
| Action: |
Not so much for
the first half, then just mostly unbelievable. |
| Laughs: |
A chuckle or two. |
| Memorable
Scene: |
Hulk fighting the
dogs. |
| Memorable
Quote: |
None. |
| Directed By: |
Ang Lee |
| Produced By: |
Avi Arad, Larry J. Franco, Gale Anne
Hurd, James Schamus |
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The Hulk
A Movie Review |
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I was close to buying it. The fake Hulk was pretty
cool, beating up the dogs was great, and he even had a personality.
But then Ang Lee did what he seems to always do, and it just made me
snap back into reality and wonder how Bruce Banner’s pants could
stretch so much. What did Lee do? He pretty much made the Hulk almost
able to fly, like those people in "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon."
Yup, there was the fake Hulk, running around, and running pretty fast,
then he started to sort of gallop, and then he was pretty much able to
leap tall mountains with a single bound. I know the Hulk is strong,
but the defying gravity thing pretty much pissed me off. Well, let’s
get to the story.It seems Bruce’s dad, David, did some genetic
testing on himself when he was in the army. Well, wouldn’t you know
it, he passed on some genetic deformations into his son when mom and
dad did the nasty. Dad knew something was amuck at the beginning and
was set to do something about it, but his plan didn’t go as planned.
So Bruce ended up being adopted, grows up into a genetic scientist
himself, and other than not being able to give enough of himself to
his girlfriend, Betty (Jennifer Connelly), Bruce seems like an alright
dude. So he and Betty are on the verge of creating these nano med
things, little creatures that can help things heal, and Talbot (Josh
Lucas) comes back into Betty’s life, trying to buy them out so he can
make millions with the nano med things. Neither Betty nor Bruce are
too keen on this idea, but that’s not the real problem. The real
problem is there is a lab accident in which Bruce gets hit with some
gamma rays and he survives seemingly unscathed.
Oh no, he’s not really unscathed, and when dad (Nick Nolte) comes
back into his life, well, Bruce begins to remember his blocked out
childhood trauma, and the big, green man is born. Now the army wants
him because he’s a threat and a possible weapon, Betty needs him or
else she becomes dog scraps, Talbot sees even more millions if he can
figure out why the Hulk is green, and dad wants to get in touch with
his inner child.
So the army catches him, Talbot loses him, the army chases him, and
the Hulk nearly flies. Then there’s the bizarre ending which really
didn’t make sense to me but might to hard-core comic readers, and we
also get to hear how "You’re not going to like me when I’m angry"
sounds in Spanish.
But is the film any good?
I can’t say I was disappointed because I never liked the fake Hulk
from the beginning, but there is one very important piece of
information you need going into this movie: The story of the Hulk is
not a happy story. Think of the movie "Batman" and not "Spider-man"
because although Spidey is tormented, he seems to have more fun.
Batman, like the Hulk, is tormented by past events, but he’s not
having a good time jumping around.
Story-wise the Hulk drags at times. There is a lot of time spent in
explaining how the Hulk ends up being the Hulk instead of getting to
the action that you will probably expect, and most of the action is
just chase scene after chase scene, because it really isn’t the Hulk
trying to help anyone, he’s just trying to not get caught or dead.
Then, to probably keep things PG-13, the Hulk really doesn’t kill
anyone. Oddly enough being tossed through a wall, slammed to the
concrete, and thrown into another person doesn’t inflict death on a
man, nor does a helicopter crash or your tank being tossed like a play
toy.
You get the love story, dad is twisted, and the Hulk is big and
green, but in the end that wasn’t enough for me. After the Hulk was
almost flying, I just couldn’t take him seriously anymore.
Wrapping up I’m only giving "The Hulk" 2 stars out of 5. It would
have been 3 except the "flying" thing still bugs me. It is a decent
story, but really more of a deep drama rather than a comic action
film.
That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!! |
