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Great Expectations
Movie Stats & Links

Starring: Ethan Hawke, Gwyneth Paltrow, Anne Bancroft, Robert De Niro
MPAA Rated: R
Released By: 20th Century Fox
Kiddie Movie: Nope. Some violence, sex, and near nudity.
Date Movie: She'll want you to take her.
Gratuitous Sex: A good scene with Estella posing in the nude for Finn, a scene with them in bed, and, in true "females are evil" form, a scene in Piff's bedroom where Piff gets all hot and heavy and Estella leaves him hangin'.
Gratuitous Violence: Some screaming, a knifing, but nothing real bad.
Action: No, not really. It's a love story.
Laughs: A couple of cute spots.
Memorable Scene: When Uncle Joe arrives at Finn's gallery opening, wearing a tux with a ruffled shirt, and sort of messes things up.
Memorable Quote: Ms. Dinsmoor takes young Finn's hand, places it over her heart, and asks "What is this?" to which Finn replies "Your..., your boob?"
Directed By: Alfonso Cuaron
Produced By: Art Linson

Great Expectations
A Movie Review

MPAA Rated - R

It's 1:51 Long

A Review by
The Dude on the Right
Well, if my high school literature teacher is in her grave, I'm sure she is spinning in it, and if she is reading this, then I'm sure she is thinking, "Dude, I'm so disappointed in you." Why? Because I honestly can't remember a damn thing about Charles Dickens' novel "Great Expectations." Hoping to bring back some long, lost, probably destroyed during college, memories, I found myself in a theater watching the new movie, aptly named, "Great Expectations," supposedly based on the book. Well, I can honestly say the movie didn't stir up any flashbacks of high school, or anything about the book for that matter, but it did help support the ongoing theory that females are evil (except for maybe the last, cheesy, 5ish minutes of the film).

The story kind of goes like this: You've got this little kid, Finnegan, call him Finn, Bell (Ethan Hawke), who's living with his Uncle Joe and his uncle's girlfriend in Florida. They don't have much dough because his uncle is a fisherman and the government put limits on nets. One day he helps out a convict (Robert De Niro), but doesn't tell anybody. Then, another day, he and his uncle go to this rich, old, somewhat crazy lady's estate to, hmm, trim the bushes. Well, it turns out the rich, old, somewhat crazy lady, Ms. Dinsmoor (Anne Bancroft) didn't want her bushes trimmed after all, but instead uses our hero, Finn, to entertain her niece, Estella (Gwyneth Paltrow) every weekend while growing up. Finn loves Estella, but Ms. Dinsmoor is raising Estella to break any guy's heart because it seems Ms. Dinsmoor was dumped at the altar years ago (looking at her now, it seems like a good call on the part of the guy who dumped her). Well, Finn gets his heart broken and Estella bolts for college.

So, Finn settles into complacency fishing with his uncle for a few years until a mysterious benefactor sends him to New York City to be an artist (Finn's first love). There Finn hits the high life, and low and behold runs into Estella. Now, being the typical guy, Finn didn't learn his lesson and falls for Estella again, and guess what, the bitch breaks his heart, again. Well, Finn has his big showing at the gallery, finally finds out who his benefactor is, and returns to Florida where the movie, well, lets just say that our boy Finn is now facing strike three. And that's basically your story.

As I sat during "Great Expectations," I guess the feeling I got was that the sensitive 90's dudes and romantic dudettes will probably like this movie, but if you prefer explosions and gunfire, or you're a biker chick, I would say to take your money elsewhere. This is a movie that doesn't really offer you surprises. Come on, you've got a love story between a girl and boy, who even the little boy says "I think she's a snob," or something like that, and the old lady says "She'll break your heart," meanwhile the dude keeps going back to her. The fun for this movie comes in the lunacy that Ms. Dinsmoor portrays, and in Robert De Niro's portrayal as the convict. Other than that it's a love story about a guy, like most sensitive 90's guys, that lets good looking women use them and throw their hearts away like garbage.

So, is this a good movie? You know, I didn't come out of this film disappointed, it was just about what I figured it would be, based on the book or not. Ethan Hawke played well a sensitive dude who can easily get his heart trampled, Gwyneth was fantastic as the hot looking girl who can manipulate a guy, even if she probably does love him, De Niro was, well, De Niro, and Bancroft played the rich, old, somewhat crazy lady great. The movie was nothing ground-breaking, but a good film.

So, from me, it's 3 stars out of 5 for "Great Expectations." Nothing fantastic, nothing bad.

That's it for this one, I'm the Dude on the Right! L8R!!


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