The Sitter

MPAA Rated – Unrated
It’s 1:22 Long
A Review by:
The Dude on the Right

The Sitter
Movie Stats & Links
Starring: Jonah Hill, Ari Graynor, Landry Bender, Kevin Hernandez, Max Records, Sam Rockewell
MPAA Rated: Unrated Version
Released By: Twentieth Century Fox Home Entertainment
Release Date: March 20, 2012
Kiddie Movie: Definitely not. Send them to bed.
Date Movie: If she’s got a sick sense of humor. If she’s a Miss Goody-Two-Shoes she will think you are a pervert.
Gratuitous Sex: The movie opens with Noah giving oral homage to Marisa and explaining his technique, so I would say “Yes.”
Gratuitous Violence: Some gun play.
Action: Nah.
Laughs: It does have some funny moments, though mostly over the top.
Memorable Scene: Nothing stood out.
Memorable Quote: Nah.
Directed By: David Gordon Green
Cool things about the Blu-ray: Nothing reallly other than it looks good. The extras are pretty generic, and you get to see an alternate ending that would have sucked.

I have to say that my favorite babysitter movie of all time is “Adventures in Babysitting.” It was fun, it was a romp of kids through the mean streets of the city, it was slightly over the top at times, and it was fairly safe for kids even though it was rated PG-13.  After seeing “The Sitter” I have to say it didn’t eclipse “Adventures…” as my favorite babysitter movie, but it was mostly fun, it was a romp of kids through the main streets of the city, it was way, way, way over the top at times, but for the love of God, put the kids and teens to bed before you even think of watching this in front of them.  Then go ahead and have a laugh or two.

For “The Sitter” we get Jonah Hill as Noah, a slug living at home, looking for love, and good at oral sex.  We pretty much find all of this out in the first 5ish minutes of the film.  It seems like all he really wants in life is to have his divorced mom find a good man, get laid, and maybe be an astronomer.  As his life would have it, to facilitate his mom going on a date, Noah takes the gig of watching the neighbor’s kids comprised of the little girl, Blithe (Landry Bender), who likes to dress in beauty pageant clothes and just wants to go out clubbing, Slater (Max Records), who is having issues of keeping friends, and Rodrigo (Kevin Henrnadez), the adopted son of said family and a little terror. Of course the kids hate Noah, and of course Noah gets a call from his girlfriend want-a-be telling Noah he’ll get laid if he brings her some cocaine, so Noah is off in the family minivan, with kids in tow, in search of Karl (Sam Rockwell), the drug kingpin, and then to meet up with Marisa (Ari Graynor). And hilarity is supposed to ensue.

I say “supposed to” because although funny is some aspects, most of it just seems rehashed or telegraphed from a mile away.  And yes, here is the proverbial spoiler alert…  Do the kids try and run away? Rodrigo does. Is there some kid mayhem? Yup. Does Noah have to come up with money to pay back Karl so he doesn’t kill someone? You betcha. Will Noah and the kids end up in a bar none of them really belong in? What do you think?

Some of it is kind of funny, in a truly adult kind of way, but a lot of it just plods along until the eventual end of Noah with the right girl, and the kids loving their new babysitter.

Jonah Hill is well, Jonah Hill, I’m not really sure what is going on with the Marisa character, and go figure, kids just want to be understood.  Kinda funny, definitely not for anyone close to a kid’s age, and for me it’s 2 stars out of 5. Oh hell, make it 2 ½ for a “totally unnecessary to the plot” boob shot.

As far as the Blu-ray it’s got some standard fare that pretty much ends up just being filler, although I did watch the “Totally Irresponsible” unrated version and honestly can’t tell you what the difference was.  The rest of the extras are “Ehh.” The deleted scenes are pretty much better deleted, and the extended scenes would have made the movie drag a ton more. Some of the outtakes are kind of funny, but the “Gag Reel” really didn’t do much.  If you want there is a “Making of…” featurette which is fine and all, but really, you’re just getting the Blu-ray for raunchy fun.

That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!