Loading ...
I was fairly content in my lack of planning to see the new “Star Wars: The Force Awakens,” but then came the Facebook taunts. Thank God, as I wrote on my Facebook post, for “Best. Wife. Ever.”
Like many a Star Wars fan, as the publicity machine began, every new trailer brought the hope of the return of the franchise to the greatness it once was, the “Please don’t give away too much of the story” moments, and built the excitement in me to see the movie. Pre-sales for tickets were announced, but I was too big and slow, like the dinosaurs, in getting initial tickets for the Thursday night screenings, let alone the opening weekend. A little bummed I figured I would see it eventually, and then some jealousy would hit me when my nephew mentioned he was going to the Star Wars marathon.
With Christmas season upon us, the decorations sprouting on houses that will annoy one and all when they aren’t taken down in a timely manner, and shopping in full force, there is one question that will be the toughest to answer, and that question is not what you should get your loved one so they won’t be disappointed, again, this year with your “thoughtful” gift that you picked up on Christmas Eve? No, the question will simply be, as you go to hang your Christmas wreath, should the bow go on the top or the bottom?
As the cold of winter was beginning to approach my wife decided to analyze my long-sleeved shirts, and it was decided that I need some replacements. I will say that one of the things I dread is shopping for clothes, mostly because I don’t really know what goes with what, although I did learn a trick from my Aunt and that was simply to look at the mannequins. Why? The stores aren’t going to dress them to look like crap, so if you pick out some clothes similar to the mannequins you will usually do fine.
Only I could somehow tie together a visit by the spirit of my Mom with farts that smell like brownies. It’s what I do, and here’s how I do it.
I can’t believe I screwed this up.
I suppose I got it from my father. I’m not talking about my wonderful good looks, nor my nose, but my love of knick-knacks. You know knick-knacks? If you type “knick-knack” into Google you get: “a small worthless object, especially a household ornament,” with wonderful synonyms like: “trinket, novelty, gewgaw, bibelot, ornament, trifle, bauble, gimcrack, curio, tchotchke, memento, souvenir, kickshaw.” My wife simply calls them dust collectors, so I guess, I’m a dust collector, although looking at the synonyms I’m thinking of shifting to calling them bibelot if only because then it sounds fancy.
I found myself in a bell tower. I won’t go into when I found myself in a bell tower because then the story would probably be worse, but there I was. I was led to the door to the bell tower, but we thought the door was locked. The 15-year old in this 47-year old body really wanted to go into the bell tower, but alas, it appeared a little lock was there between normal-ness and adventure. Oh well. Then an opportunity came for me to be by that door again, and low and behold the lock wasn’t really locked, I opened the door and found myself, alone, climbing the stairs. But I was torn. In my head I knew I shouldn’t really be there, the initial stairs were kind of rickety, but I continued to climb. I made it to the first level, looked up the next set of stairs, and somehow continued going up.
As a Catholic and a Polish dude I was preparing for Lent. Paczki were ordered, and I began pondering the Lenten season. For years we are always told we should give something up until Easter, although the rules were always a little shady as sometimes we were told we were able to have on Sundays what we gave up, other times there was the spirit of “fasting” for the entire season. One year I did great, giving up adding sweetener, both artificial and natural, into things, specifically my iced tea and coffee. Somehow I made it through the season although I did pick up the diet soda after Easter. This season, though, I had a plan. I was going to add some things which I know kind of goes against the theory of Lent, but I felt trying to consistently do my yoga, meditation, and exercising for the season would make me a better person, but on the giving up something I went back to the old standard, giving up soda.
I have an Aerospace Engineering degree from Illinois Institute of Technology, I have made some iPhone apps, I can, or at least used to be able to play the violin, and I can cook an awesome steak, but why is it when it comes to the staple of college students everywhere, something I never actually made when I was in college, I find that I somehow suck at making Maruchan’s Ramen Noodle Soup. The discovery came a little while back when, at the request of my wife when she wasn’t feeling well, she requested I make her a bowl of soup. My immediate thought was some Lipton Cup-o-Soup, but for her she wanted Ramen Noodles.