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The Pink Panther
Movie Stats & Links

Starring: Steve Martin, Kevin Kline, Beyonce Knowles
MPAA Rated: PG
Released By: MGM Pictures
Web Site: pinkpantherthemovie.com
Kiddie Movie: It's really better for them.
Date Movie: Only if she's bringing her six year old.
Gratuitous Sex: Hinted, but badlly.
Gratuitous Violence: Slapstick.
Action: Some running around.
Laughs: A few.
Memorable Scene: I did like the camouflage scene for some bizarre reason.
Memorable Quote: There was one, but I forget what it is.  Guess it wasn't so memorable after all.
Directed By: Shawn Levy
Produced By: Robert Simonds

The Pink Panther
A Movie Review

MPAA Rated - PG

It's 1:45 Long

A Review by
The Dude on the Right
Wow. After seeing the remake of "The Pink Panther" starring Steve Martin, all Iíve got to say is "Where do I start?" I suppose Iíll start with a quick story synopsis, and then continue with all the other thoughts.

For this film we get Steve Martin playing the role of the bumbling detective Inspector Clouseau and Kevin Kline as Chief Inspector Dreyfus. It seems some rich soccer coach dude gets offed after his team won the big game. Xania (Beyonce Knowles) was the dudeís girlfriend, so, of course, sheís a suspect. Dreyfus brings in Clouseau as the lead detective for this case so that while Clouseau is making a mockery of himself, well, Dreyfus can find the real killer and get all of the glory and the big Medal of Honor. Dreyfus also has Gilbert (Jean Reno) be Clouseauís partner so that Gilbert can feed Dreyfus everything Clouseau is doing just in case Clouseau actually gets a real clue.

As the movie goes, yea, Clouseau gets into all kinds of pickles, has a really bad accent that causes some problems at the airport, and yes, solves the crime. Hooray, Clouseau does it again!

So, with that quick synopsis, let get to the other places I could have started.

At first glance, with the original trailer, I almost thought Steve Martin could be a nice replacement for the role made famous by Peter Sellers. I was mistaken. There was something endearing about Peter Sellers as Inspector Clouseau, especially since he was the original, and heís an original that can have no replacement. It also makes me wonder about the choices Steve Martin is making, and he even had a writing credit for this film. Here he is, one of the great comedians of our time, and heís in roles that seem, well, far beneath him, like this movie and "Cheaper by the Dozen 2." Itís almost like he takes these for the money so he can go and make a movie like "Shopgirl." I love Steve Martin, but a movie like "The Pink Panther" drops that love just a tad.

And donít get me started about Kevin Kline. Hereís another brilliant actor, in a role that can in no way compare to that of Herbert Lon. He tries, but just doesnít cut it. I could also go more into why Beyonce or Jean Reno would lend themselves to this movie, other than the idea that "Itís got Steve Martin and Kevin Kline? I donít need to read the script, of course Iím in!" filled their heads rather than, well, reading the script.

Hereís another thing that bugged me about this flick. As a young lad growing up there was just more hinted sex for the original films, and better fighting between Clouseau and Cato, even some slight nudity in "The Pink Panther Strikes Again," that instantly makes it a classic in the eyes of a pre-pubescent boy just coming into the age of "Wow, sheís hot!" I couldnít figure out where they were really going with the remake because it seems they wanted to make this version of "The Pink Panther" a little more adult, but decided that itís only chance to make some money was to clean it up so it could be rated PG for the kiddies rather than the PG-13 the movie really needed to be for the adults. My recommendation for this film would have been to just go all out and make it a true adult comedy and shoot for the R rating. Damn, thinking about it, an all-out R-rated Pink Panther could really have been funny.

Well, this review is getting too long as it is for a movie that really isnít made for adults. The six-ish year old next to me seemed to love the film, laughing at everything a six-ish year old would laugh at, and there was someone else towards the back of the theater doing the same. Me, I did laugh a couple of times, and yes, they did have a scene showing farts are funny, but for the most part, this movie just seemed to go for the laughs a younginí could enjoy, and just leave the parents going "What happened to ĎThe Pink Pantherí I used to know and love?" This wasnít it.

In the end, because I did laugh a couple of times, I will give "The Pink Panther" 1 Ĺ stars out of 5, but for the most part, this remake is made for the kids, with an occasional joke geared for the adults, but usually falling flat because itís nothing we havenít heard before. I donít care what the folks at Columbia Pictures say, I say they dumped this movie into the February movie season because they knew it wasnít great but might be able to get some type of box office with the lack of movies everyone wants to see. This is not the adult "Pink Panther" series most of us remember, this is one made for the kids.  Oh well.

Thatís it for this one! Iím The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

 

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