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License to Wed
Movie Stats & Links

Starring: Robin Williams, Mandy Moore, John Krasinski
MPAA Rated: PG-13
Released By: Warner Bros.
Web Site: licensetowedthemovie.com

 

Kiddie Movie: They'd get bored.
Date Movie: Only if she liked the trailer and you are the utmost sure of your relationship.
Gratuitous Sex: Talk, mostly because rule #2 says no sex before marriage.
Gratuitous Violence: A quick punch to the face.
Action: Nah.
Laughs: Not really.
Memorable Scene: I did like Ben beating the crap out of the robot baby.
Memorable Quote: None.
Directed By: Ken Kwapis
Produced By: Mike Medavoy, Arnold Messer, Nick Osborne, Robert Simonds

License to Wed
A Movie Review

MPAA Rated - PG-13

It's 1:30 Long

A Review by
The Dude on the Right
As a Mandy Moore stalker I try to catch as many movies with her in them as I can, no matter the premise, and so, having some free time on a Friday morning, I headed to my local gigaplex to catch her in a movie that looked to have some promise, "License to Wed." Sadly the movie ended up with no promise, only Mandyís cute smile. Hereís the story basics.

Sadie (Mandy Moore) and Ben (John Krasinski) are in love. They met a mere six months ago, now live in sin, and much to the obvious dismay of Sadieís parents, Ben asks Sadie to spend the rest of her life with him. She says "Yes," but her only condition is a traditional church wedding with the good Reverend Frank (Robin Williams) presiding. Ben would have preferred getting married on a beach, but hey, heís in love and is a little bit of a puss so he does what Sadie wants.

Off to church to meet with the good Reverend, Frank lets them know he has an opening either two years away or in only three weeks. Being in love our happy couple opts for the three-week wedding window, only to find out that also in that time they will have to go through Reverend Frankís pre-marriage course. And then hilarity is supposed to ensue.

It seems that Reverend Frankís course isnít so much about finding if you are compatible, if you really love each other, if you can decide how many kids you both want, or nice things like that.  Nope, the course is pretty much designed for the both of you to end up hating each other, thereby showing, I guess, how strong your love really is and that thanks to the Reverend you will be able to handle anything as a married couple. Yup, during the course you find yourself telling your in-laws exactly what you think of them, tell your sexual fantasies to your priest (that scene just seemed really creepy and wrong), make fun of your partner, drive a car while blindfolded, and punch out Reverend Frank for screwing up your perfect relationship. Then, of course, both of you realize you have faults, as does your partner, and you live happily ever after.

The premise of the over-the-top Pre-Cana training seemed kind of funny at first, but the pretty much sadistic nature of Reverend Frankís methods just made me wonder why the hell anyone would get married. Then there is Benís best friend and best man, Joel (DeRay Davis), pretty much showing every bit as to why marriage sucks.

Look, I know some people might like this movie, with my sister probably being one of them, and a confirmation that my buddy, Big Bouncer Jimmy, really liked it, but I just thought the movie went for the easy jokes, and again reinforced my wondering why people would get married if that is what married life is really like. I laughed twice, once when Ben was beating the crap out of one of the fake babies Frank made the couple carry around, and the other was when Ben cold-cocked the Reverend.

The trailer gives you most of the jokes, so if you want to spend an hour and a half in the theater watching for them, feel free to go and see "License to Wed." I wish the film folks would have put forth more effort into the story than a cheap joke like Ben getting hit in the nose by a baseball and Reverend Frank going into "I can heal you!" mode. I was also slightly insulted with the joke of what it would feel like for a man to give birth because every fan of Bill Cosbyís "Himself" knows itís the bottom lip and not your scrotum that gets pulled over your head.

I give the movie Ĺ star out of 5, and I should have asked Big Bouncer Jimmy how many stars he would have given it, so Iíll just assume at least 3 Ĺ. Iíll average them together and give "License to Wed" 2 stars out of 5. Watching the trailer will tell you if you will like the movie, and trust me, they donít get any more creative than what you find there.

Thatís it for this one! Iím The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

 

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