License to Wed
Movie Stats & Links
||Robin Williams, Mandy Moore, John
||They'd get bored.
||Only if she liked
the trailer and you are the utmost sure of your
because rule #2 says no sex before marriage.
||A quick punch to
||I did like Ben
beating the crap out of the robot baby.
Arnold Messer, Nick Osborne, Robert Simonds
As a Mandy Moore stalker I try to catch as many movies
with her in them as I can, no matter the premise, and so,
having some free time on a Friday morning, I headed to my
local gigaplex to catch her in a movie that looked to have
some promise, "License to Wed." Sadly the movie ended up
with no promise, only Mandyís cute smile. Hereís the story
License to Wed
A Movie Review
Sadie (Mandy Moore) and Ben (John Krasinski) are in love.
They met a mere six months ago, now live in sin, and much to
the obvious dismay of Sadieís parents, Ben asks Sadie to
spend the rest of her life with him. She says "Yes," but her
only condition is a traditional church wedding with the good
Reverend Frank (Robin Williams) presiding. Ben would have
preferred getting married on a beach, but hey, heís in love
and is a little bit of a puss so he does what Sadie wants.
Off to church to meet with the good Reverend, Frank lets
them know he has an opening either two years away or in only
three weeks. Being in love our happy couple opts for the
three-week wedding window, only to find out that also in
that time they will have to go through Reverend Frankís
pre-marriage course. And then hilarity is supposed to ensue.
It seems that Reverend Frankís course isnít so much about
finding if you are compatible, if you really love each
other, if you can decide how many kids you both want, or
nice things like that. Nope, the course is pretty much
designed for the both of you to end up hating each other,
thereby showing, I guess, how strong your love really is and
that thanks to the Reverend you will be able to handle
anything as a married couple. Yup, during the course you
find yourself telling your in-laws exactly what you think of
them, tell your sexual fantasies to your priest (that scene
just seemed really creepy and wrong), make fun of your
partner, drive a car while blindfolded, and punch out
Reverend Frank for screwing up your perfect relationship.
Then, of course, both of you realize you have faults, as
does your partner, and you live happily ever after.
The premise of the over-the-top Pre-Cana training seemed
kind of funny at first, but the pretty much sadistic nature
of Reverend Frankís methods just made me wonder why the hell
anyone would get married. Then there is Benís best friend
and best man, Joel (DeRay Davis), pretty much showing every
bit as to why marriage sucks.
Look, I know some people might like this movie, with my
sister probably being one of them, and a confirmation that
my buddy, Big Bouncer Jimmy, really liked it, but I just
thought the movie went for the easy jokes, and again
reinforced my wondering why people would get married if that
is what married life is really like. I laughed twice, once
when Ben was beating the crap out of one of the fake babies
Frank made the couple carry around, and the other was when
Ben cold-cocked the Reverend.
The trailer gives you most of the jokes, so if you want
to spend an hour and a half in the theater watching for
them, feel free to go and see "License to Wed." I wish the
film folks would have put forth more effort into the story
than a cheap joke like Ben getting hit in the nose by a
baseball and Reverend Frank going into "I can heal you!"
mode. I was also slightly insulted with the joke of what it
would feel like for a man to give birth because every fan of
Bill Cosbyís "Himself" knows itís the bottom lip and not
your scrotum that gets pulled over your head.
I give the movie Ĺ star out of 5, and I should have asked
Big Bouncer Jimmy how many stars he would have given it, so
Iíll just assume at least 3 Ĺ. Iíll average them together
and give "License to Wed" 2 stars out of 5. Watching the
trailer will tell you if you will like the movie, and trust
me, they donít get any more creative than what you find
Thatís it for this one! Iím The Dude on the Right!!