Movie Stats & Links
||Depends on if your
date is an inhabitant of Easily Amused.
||Mostly nudity and
||People get thrown
||If you are an
inhabitant of Easily Amused.
||The scene where
Deuce's "stop whales from beaching" device goes haywire.
Adam Sandler, John Schneider
I can fully understand critics giving this movie zero
stars, Ĺ star, or maybe 1 star. I really can. I understand
this, because, yes, the movie is everything these critics
have been writing or saying about it. But "Deuce Bigalow:
European Gigolo" is the kind of movie made not having a
criticís opinion in mind, but rather appealing to the folks
of the country of Easily Amused, of which I am proclaiming
myself King, because, yes, as dumb as the movie pretty much
was, I couldnít help but laugh at each of the new words and
phrases that were invented to replace the word "penis." And
who canít appreciate a pimp-boat.
A Movie Review
Deuce Bigalowís (Rob Schneider) last couple of years
haven't been going well. First he loses his wife with one
leg to a turtle feeding mishap where the lettuce was tainted
with meat, inviting the sharks to come along, that once they
spit out the lettuce decided Kate would make a better meal.
Then his development of a device to stop whales from
beaching kinda goes haywire. Now Bruce is a wanted man and
thank goodness for Bruce that his old buddy T.J. (Eddie
Griffin) is having some issues in Amsterdam and invites
Bruce to pay him a visit.
It seems that gigolos are having a bit of a problem in
Amsterdam, namely they are being killed off, and T.J. is
worried as business starts to dry up. When T.J. is framed
for one of the murders, itís now up to Deuce to go
under-cover, meeting up, again, with a variety of freaky
women (one has a penis for a nose, watch out for her sneeze,
another who has more of a blow-hole rather than a
tracheotomy, watch out for hiccups, and another has giant
ears, so of course there is no better way to get a man to
stop checking out her ears if she were to get a boob job),
and once again, rather than just being the man-whore that he
is, he makes the women feel better about themselves. As
Deuceís investigation gets deeper and deeper, of course
there is also a love interest that develops for Deuce, and
yes, in the end, Deuce saves the gigolos from being blown
up, and all is back to normal in the man-whore world.
Like I said, as King of Easily Amused, I knew what to
expect going into this film, and got exactly that, and a
little bit more thanks to the likes of Norm Macdonald as a
crotchety old man-whore. There is also an extension of the
vocabulary for the word "penis," and Iím sure I missed some,
but we find "Lock Ness Monster," "schlong," "man-gina,"
"he-pussy," "magic shenis," "snatch pole," and "she cock" to
name a few. We are also introduced to some new terminology
for kinky sex acts, expanding on the "Dirty Sanchez" to give
us things like the "Filthy Ramirez," "Cambodian Creamsicle,"
"Turkish Sno-Cone," "Chili Rainbow," and the scarily
portrayed "Portuguese Breakfast."
Look, the boys are in Amsterdam, so you definitely get
some drug use, some nudity, and some kinky sex. You also get
exactly what you will expect from this movie, so for those
critics who gave it zero stars, like I said, I understand
your stance, but for me, itís 3 Ĺ stars out of 5 for being
exactly what it was made out to be: humor for us in the land
of Easily Amused. Stupid. Yea, so what, but I still enjoyed
it and thatís why Iím King.
Thatís it for this one! Iím The Dude on the Right!!