Tag: Statue of Liberty

Would You Go on a Water Slide Taller than The Statue of Liberty?

Have you been summoned for jury duty?

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The other week I’m watching the news and there is talk of a water slide that has officially broken the Guinness World Record for tallest water slide. Sure, there’s a world record for just about anything these days, so why not a water slide? Most people might probably expect the story to be at some exotic location, maybe Dubai or Kuala Lampur, you know, those places where they are building skyscrapers that touch the heavens, or maybe at some fancy Six Flags theme park, but no, instead of the United States sporting the tallest skyscraper we get to now boast the tallest water slide, and not in some huge metropolis – to ride the tallest water slide get your butt to Kansas City, Kansas (not the Missouri version), and this place called the Schlitterbahn Water Park, a chain of water parks throughout the country, but now making Kansas City famous.

The ride is called Verruckt, and clocking in at 168′ 7″, the drop is taller than The Statue of Liberty or going over Niagara Falls, and as the website lets you know, you won’t be getting a super-wedgie as this is an actual ride where you will be safely secured in a four person raft before going over a second hill a mere 50 feet.

Sure, the fact you will be in a raft might take some of the daredevil nature out of the ride, but still, it seems kind of wacky going down a water slide that would be like plunging over Niagara, though no more wacky than some of the tallest roller coasters. Me, I used to be a roller coaster kind of guy, though that has waned mostly because I haven’t been to my favorite theme part in the world, Cedar Point, in years, home to some of the best coasters and memories squiggles and of my buddy Rob doing an impression of Cornholio before we even knew who Cornholio was.

I probably won’t be making it to Schlittergahn anytime soon, but America, be proud! We have the tallest water slide, but I wonder: Would you go on a water slide taller than The Statue of Liberty?

That’s it for this one! L8R!!

Do you wave at mascots on the side of the road?

As a proud member of the fraternity of mascots, I have much respect for everyone who dons the giant costume in support of their team/business/cause, and maybe not as much respect for those who just put on the costume to be freaky, but I do understand the physical challenges of trying to accomplish normal tasks with a giant, costumed head on. I bring this up because although tax season has been over for a few weeks, driving past the Liberty Tax shop the other day I thought about how they hire the people to stand on the side of the road in the Statue of Liberty outfit. Granted the outfit is fairly simple, basically just a robe and a cheesy crown, but they get the kids out there, on the side of the road, trying to lure people in to get their taxes done their and not at the H&R Block down the street.

Having worn a mascot costume before, I have also become a person of mascot envy at times. This stemmed from a stint at a trade show where I found myself in this weird world of the mascot “holding” area, a back suite of offices where all of the various people donning the mascot suits could get set up so as not to freak out any kids that might be around, thus perpetrating that the mascots are actually real characters. The envy stemmed from when, as my costume was made of a giant, plaster head and a body suit that is more like the material from a quilt, thus creating a sauna effect which although good for a Bikram yoga workout, turned me into a sweaty mess, I came across other mascot outfits made of lightweight plastic for the head, complete with a fan, and a body suit made of lightweight fabric that could actually breath. I quickly had dreams of modifying my costume trying to figure out how to put a fan in the head and come up with a cooling suit for underneath the body of the costume. In the end, though, the costume remains the same, and is a good way to drop some water weight when need be.

Back to the Statue of Liberty people.

Driving past, not that tax season is over, I did feel a little bummed because the kids aren’t on the side of the road, because I’m one of those people who always wave at the mascot on the side of the road. I don’t go crazy and honk my horn, well, not always anyway, but driving by I’ll give a quick wave, and feel their pain. I also wondered how many other people wave at the mascots, and so I plight: Do you wave at mascots on the side of the road?

That’s it for this plight! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!