Have You Ever Been Pooped on by a Bird?

I don’t know if it’s because it’s that time of year, or because the Canadian Geese seem to have no clue anymore of where to migrate to, but lately, at the park where I walk Milo, the geese have claimed most of the park and like to go in various landing patterns during our walk. The thing is their landings patterns don’t really follow any runways, and they somehow seem to follow us on our walk, flying overhead and making me tell Milo, “Don’t look up, Buddy! You might get poop in your eye!” Why? Because as far as I’m concerned Canadian Geese are just poop machines and serve just about no other purpose.

Sure, I have my fears about Canadian Geese taking over the world as once they dive-bombed my car (Thank God the sunroof was closed!), and the story was also perpetrated that they were responsible for contaminating the water supply where I live, but luckily, on our walks, we haven’t been the victims of a Canadian bombing attack. That’s not to say I haven’t been pooped on by a bird before as I recall two instances, one when I used to work in downtown Chicago and got pooped on walking next to a building, and the other going to a Chicago Cubs game and walking under the El-tracks.

Being winter and getting Milo out for decent walks is more of a chore than an enjoyment now, and instead of just the weather I now have the concern of a geese bombing incident (Happily Milo doesn’t want to eat the goose poop that is on the ground!), and as the geese come in for a landing I think back to the times I’ve been pooped on, even writing about it before, and I plight: Have you ever been pooped on by a bird?

That’s it for this plight! I’m The ┬áDude on the Right!! L8R!!!