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« I'm In The Afternoon of Anna Nicole Smith. | Main | Why Do Men Understand Boobs Better Than Women? »

March 12, 2007

Las Vegas Has Boobs, and They Feel Nice.

I just got back from my annual Las Vegas trip. Each time I visit I like to try something new and this time the cosmic Vegas energy pulled me toward a nudie bar. Yepper, I said “nudie bar,” otherwise known as a Gentleman's Club. These places are pretty much a mystery for most of the girlfriends and wives in the world, and I can officially say that what you think happens in there is nothing close to reality. Granted I can only speak to the one I went into, but it was Vegas, and it was a nudie bar. Kicking off, the girls that I met are really great to talk to, and I learned a great deal about the business. I am sure you don’t want those boring details so I will move onto the good stuff…. breasts. Yes, I finally got my hands on a good, silicone-filled breast. I have always wanted to feel one of those (having been blessed with big, natural hooters, I don’t need to enhance mine), and I have always thought they looked different - Perfectly round and both boobs match, which is not the case with real ones. They are a little firmer then real ones, but all in all I would have to say they feel pretty damn nice, kind of like a firm pillow, which was proven when the girls allowed me to do a “motor-boat” in them. I also have to mention that the girl's skin is the softest I have ever felt, next to a baby's. The skin treatments these girls use definitely pays off, leaving their skin kind of like a firm pillow with flannel sheets.

Now it was also brought to my attention that you guys out there are not allowed to touch these soft, firm boobs, which would explain why every guy in the place had their hands hanging off the sides of the chair like they were paralyzed, I guess so that Brutus the bouncer doesn’t come over and kick your ass. So, any vision women have that the guy is groping the girl on his lap is pretty much wrong, unless the girl gives permission (which does not seem to be often). Pretty much he cannot touch her. I was also a little surprised by the lap dance experience. Now don’t get me wrong, it is pretty cool, but it is the only time the girl had no top on. Also, since there was alcohol being served, she had on a g-string, so she is not completely naked. The lap dance is pretty much a lot of rubbing and boobs in your face only she does the rubbing and you’re not rubbing her, although I did get a spank in on her firm, little butt (I am a female so Brutus was not going to kick my ass).

I was disappointed in the stage dancers because they didn’t do acrobatic stunts on the pole. I guess Hollywood makes that look more interesting, but for the most part the girls just danced around the stage, around the pole. A little bit of a bummer.

All in all I think women need to visit a nudie bar at least once and see that what you think is going on is much worse then the reality of what is going on. There is a difference between a hooker and a stripper, or exotic dancer as they are sometimes called, and granted some strippers may blur the line. But if your man is willing to do that, a strip club is the least of your worries. And besides, the sex you get from your man after he has been all teased up by a stripper is definitely worth the price of his admission to these places. So girls, LIGHTEN UP!

See Ya!

Posted by Trash at March 12, 2007 8:20 PM


Vegas rules have lightened up. I was just there and my hands did some rubbing as well. Or maybe the dancer was into me. Anyway, I'm trying to find out what they use to keep their skin so smooth. I do smell a hint of baby powder.

Posted by: good times at March 15, 2009 11:11 PM

I would love to learn about the skin treatment they do for themselves. I have never felt such soft skin since my daughter was a baby. I went with my boyfriend to a nudie bar and was amazed!

Posted by: Shel at September 21, 2007 10:40 AM

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