The Dude on the Right
As I was on the phone with my accountant, Dewey, of the firm Dewey, Cheatem, &
Howe, I started telling Dewey how I was getting sucked into the Olympic coverage
of Curling. Yea, that’s right, the Olympic sport where they slide this big
boulder rock things down the ice, kinda like shuffleboard without the stick, and
use brooms to help direct/speed-up/slow-down the rock, hoping to either bounce
the opposing teams rocks out of the way, or get your rock in either a blocking
position or in a position to score. Stu Gotz was in the office at the time
and immediately started to bust my balls, professing how he was totally into the
Women’s Speed Skating, with the women in those skin-tight outfits, while there I
was, watching dudes slide a stone. Dewey, of course, heard this, and
started busting my balls as well, but then, after hanging up the phone on Dewey
in mid-insult, I reminded Stu that he loved the movie "Curious George."
With that, he backed down a tad.
Anyway, as for my fascination with curling,
it really began with the Winter Olympic coverage four years ago. Me, I’m
the kind of guy who can just sit in front of the TV on a Sunday afternoon and
watch a full round of golf, so why not be fascinated with curling? This year,
though, I was reading the paper yesterday and saw they had coverage of the men’s
curling on CNBC. I changed the channel and quickly became totally
fascinated by the audio of the event that will hopefully make it into a podcast
next week. Yup, I was sucked in. But then came the woman’s event
today, with the Team USA dudettes playing the dudettes of Denmark. As the
audio still intrigued me, suddenly I was in love, as I am a sucker for a dudette
with blondish hair, blue eyes, and a killer smile, staring down a big ol’ rock and yelling/telling her teammates where it really needs to end up . My next person to
stalk, I mean, to admire from afar, is team skip,
Cassie Johnson. I’ll just say I was mesmerized, and totally
disappointed when that last rock hit some debris thing on the ice that
misdirected it ever so slightly so that the Denmark dudettes won the round.
Sadly, the Team USA curling dudettes might be eliminated pretty soon, they
aren’t doing too well it seems, and that makes me sad. I believe my last
chance to catch them might be this coming Monday, but there’s always a chance
they can go on a curling tear and I’ll be there every step of the way.
As far as Stu, go ahead and stalk, I mean, admire from afar, those dudette speed
skaters. Me, I’ve always had a thing for the girl next door look, and
Cassie has that. And her sister is cute, too, but she’s engaged.
Cassie has a degree in graphic design and I’d love to offer her a job to help us
with Stu & The Dude
Reviewin’ the Movies for You! It’s just too bad I couldn’t offer her
any money, and I’d probably be slapped with a sexual harrasment lawsuit. Oh well, I guess I’ll just stalk, I mean, admire her from afar,
and hope the team does go on a curling tear. Good luck ladies! And
Cassie, if by some miracle I win the $365 million
Powerball this weekend,
there might be a job offer coming your way.
That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!