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XXX: State of the Union
Movie Stats & Links

Starring: Ice Cube, Samuel L. Jackson, Willem Dafoe
MPAA Rated: PG-13
Released By: Columbia Pictures
Web Site: sonypictures.com/.../triplex2/
Kiddie Movie: Nah.
Date Movie: Nah.
Gratuitous Sex: Push-up bras.
Gratuitous Violence: Lots of it, but most of the people don't die.
Action: Lots of it.
Laughs: Ehh.
Memorable Scene: The tank fighting scene.
Memorable Quote: Gibbons to Stone: "I told you you should have killed that bitch."
Directed By: Lee Tamahori
Produced By: Neal H. Moritz, Arne Schmidt

XXX: State of the Union
A Movie Review

MPAA Rated - PG-13

It's 1:41 Long

A Review by
The Dude on the Right
Nothing against Ice Cube, but Iím guessing the folks at Sony might be thinking "You know, maybe we should have given Vin some extra cash to reprise his role." Or at least they could have come up with a better story. Here we goÖ

Ice Cube is Darius Stone. When the XXX headquarters gets attacked, our old friend Agent Gibbons decides he needs to get himself off the radar and recruit a new XXX, namely Darius. It seems Darius and Gibbons actually worked together before, under the now Defense Secretary Deckert (Willem Dafoe), and none of them got along very well. Well, Gibbons figures something is up, and he and Darius, along with Toby (Michael Roof), the gadget dude from the original. Low and behold, in keeping himself off of the radar, Gibbons decides he should head to his house to find some information that might help, and we are led to believe he is dead in a horrible gas leak explosion. Now itís up to Darius, Toby, and Dariusí old squeeze Lola (Nona Gaye) to figure out what is going on, and of course, they do.

It seems the Defense Secretary isnít liking the good Presidentís upcoming defense policy, namely reducing military spending while trying to make the U.S. look like better neighbors by giving more foreign aid. Somehow Deckert is able to enlist an aircraft carrier size force to help him carry out his dastardly plan to somehow knock off all those ahead of him so that he could be President, all the while making it look like he didnít do it. Sure, doesnít seem feasible, does it? Well then, donít worry, because if you can live with that plot then you can probably also accept five tricked out trucks and SUVís, staffed with a bunch of dudes straight from a ghetto chop-shop, being able to tank-jack a, well, tank, and drive themselves right to the steps of the Capitol building.

Look, "XXX: State of the Union" is what it is, namely a fabled story filled with action and violence to make you get over a weak story. The problem is that the story is really too weak to get over, that and the fact that as much as they try, the stunts just donít compare to the original. "XXX" was so much better a film, and I think itís because Xander Cage had a better backstory, and although over-the-top, not nearly as much so as this movie. There was that, and this is going to sound very wrong, but the acting was much better in the original than in this sequel. Willem Dafoe was a great villain in "Spider-Man," less so here. Ice Cube just didnít have the anti-establishment feel that Vin brought to the role. And the rest of the supporting casts just had no convincing or redeeming qualities (other than, I suppose, some well adjusted boobies).

You do get some fun stunts, and a line or two, but for the most part, "XXX: State of the Union" really didnít give you the fun that the original did. If this was the script Vin was given, I hate to say it, but he really did the right thing as this story probably would have sunk his action hero career. Call me stupid, but it looks like Vin taking his role in "The Pacifier" was the right thing to do. What do I know? Itís 1 Ĺ stars out of 5 for "XXX: State of the Union."

I did get one thing out of this movie that now gives me new entertainment at PG-13 movies, and that comes in a weird way from the movie "Be Cool."  In that movie Travolta's character muses how you are only allowed to say "fuck" once, otherwise it will be bumped to an R rating.  In "XXX: State of the Union," there is one strategically placed "Fuck you," so I'm wondering if this is really a guideline.  Just an afterthought.

Thatís it for this one! Iím The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

 

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