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Six Days, Seven Nights
Movie Stats & Links

Starring: Harrison Ford, Anne Heche, David Schwimmer, Jacqueline Obradors
MPAA Rated: PG-13
Released By: Touchstone Pictures
Kiddie Movie: There is nothing bad here, nor is there anything for them.
Date Movie: I can think of better but this will do.
Gratuitous Sex: Implied. No nudity here, but I will say that they must have kept the set cold and that tropical local must have had a cold snap because Anne's tits almost put out Harry's eyes while giving me naughty thoughts (you think Ellen would do a 3-way?)
Gratuitous Violence: A couple of faces get smashed.
Action: Being chased by pirates and crashing a plane fills this category in my book
Laughs: Lots of one-liners and funny scenes.
Memorable Scene: Frank, waking up with bed-head in the wrong bed.
Memorable Quote: A pissed-off Quinn summing up the reasons why Robin isn't his type "… and your tits are too small!"
Directed By: Ivan Reitman
Produced By: Ivan Reitman, Wally Nicita, Roger Birnbaum

Six Days, Seven Nights
A Movie Review

MPAA Rated - PG-13

It's 1:40 Long

A Review by
Stu Gotz

Ivan Reitman's new movie "Six Days, Seven Nights" may not be very original or very romantic, but it does entertain. I say that it's not very original because it's basically a re-hash of "Romancing the Stone" with a little of "The Horse Whisperer" thrown in, or a remake of some of those old "stranded with a chick" movies.

Anne Heche plays Robin Monroe, an overworked, assistant editor of a New York based fashion magazine. David Schwimmer plays Frank Martin, her wuss boyfriend. As a romantic way to propose to her, Frank whisks Robin away to a tropical island paradise. All is hunky-dorry and love is in the air until Robin's job gets in the way. Seems she has to fly to Tahiti for a one day photo shoot. The wuss Frank doesn't really object, so off she goes. Anyway, the flight heads into a thunderstorm, and her plane crashes, leaving her marooned with a "not ready to pamper her New York ass" pilot, Quinn Harris, played by Harrison Ford. So anyway, there they are stranded on an island without a rescue beacon, no radio, a smashed plane (does this sound like Gilligan's Island?), eating peacocks, being chased by the pirates of the pacific, and falling in love. But wait!!! That cheating bitch is engaged right? That's OK because in her absence David is getting some tasty nooky a-la Angelica, played by Jacqueline Obradors. So much for fidelity, right? Well as fate would have it, Quinn gets Robin in an anti-climactic, not a surprise, but still subtly funny ending.

OK… so the plot was thin and, like I said, not very original, but under Reitman's direction with Michael Browning's writing the movie worked. Alright… It did but it didn't. Harry and Anne both acted well, and their parts were well written, but their whole relationship lacked the underlying chemistry needed when you're trying to make a romantic, action adventure. They were good when they were bickering back and forth, but as a team they failed. So, whoever cast this movie was a little off, or were they? I don't know, but here are my impressions on a singular basis:

  • David Schwimmer… I haven't been impressed with his lead acting abilities in the past, but his portrayal of Robin's SNAG (Sensitive New Age Guy) boyfriend was by far his best appearance in any movie. A combination of his acting ability with a well written role left me chuckling in my seat, shaking my head, and saying "What a puss!," or "What a dog!," and "Fuck her… I would!" His, I dare say, was the best character in the whole movie. No offense to Harrison or Anne, and you really couldn't center a movie around the SNAG, but it was the role that made me react the most.
  • Jacqueline Obradors… What a set of tits! What a body! What a sexy smile! Mmm… Excuse me while I go toss one off in the bathroom. Nuff said.

OK… I'm back…

  • Anne Heche… Hmm… I thought hers was well written role, I just don't think she was the actress to pull it off (Oh yeah… upon exiting the theater a patron commented that she reminded him of a "Popsicle"). She has a great sarcastic wit that the camera picked up, and she even does well during those silent, serious moments, but where she didn't come through was during the dramatic, speaking moments. I don't know, but something is just missing when she delivers serious and sensitive words. Unfortunately for this movie that was an important aspect and her inability to deliver hurt this movie.
  • Harrison Ford… What can be said about Harry? He was simply great in every portrayal, from an early, funny scene where he was a great sloppy drunk, to when his role called for action. He was the man who could swing a big bat when necessary, and when he needed to be sarcastic, he was classic. From his facial smirks to his serious voice, few actors in Hollywood can do it better.

In the end, I liked "Six Days, Seven Nights" because the dialogue was well written (the story was nothing new) and the cast was, well… almost perfectly cast. All that being said I give "Six Days, Seven Nights" 3 ½ stars out of 5. It's a good film, and I'm Stu Gotz. 'Nuff said!

 

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