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300
Movie Stats & Links |
| Starring: |
Gerard Butler, Lena Headey,
Rodrigo Santoro |
| MPAA Rated: |
R |
| Released By: |
Warner Bros. |
| Web Site: |
www.300themovie.com |
| Kiddie Movie: |
For the love of any God, leave
them at home. |
| Date Movie: |
She might like the buff bodies,
but hate the violence. |
| Gratuitous Sex: |
Both sex and nudity! |
| Gratuitous
Violence: |
Some of the most gratuitous I
have seen in a long time. |
| Action: |
Lots of battles. |
| Laughs: |
There's some chuckles. |
| Memorable
Scene: |
The opening scene with the baby
sets up the entire story. |
| Memorable
Quote: |
"Then we will fight in the
shade!" |
| Directed By: |
Zack Snyder |
| Produced By: |
Mark Canton,
Bernie Goldmann, Gianni
Nunnari, Jeffrey Silver |
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300
A Movie Review |
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Because of some scheduling issues while I was visiting my
parents last weekend, I couldn’t see "300" at the new
theater with the stadium seating and good sound. Instead I
found myself at a different theater, complete with sticky
floors, lousy sound, and you’re happy it’s pretty dark
inside because you probably don’t want to see the condition
of the squeaky seats you are sitting in. And as I was
waiting for the film to start it was obvious the theater
didn’t give a damn about letting those under 17 into the
R-rated film as the mid-teenagers began to infiltrate. Sadly
this left my movie-going experience a bit underwhelming,
especially for such a grandiose film, but at least the youngins
were behaved, just happy to see gratuitous violence,
gratuitous sex, and gratuitous nudity, although from the
"What the hell is that?" comments I don’t think they liked the new
commercial for Dove Pro-Age, the one with the naked, older
people, before the movie started. But enough movie-going experience, let’s get to
"300."
I’m not a history buff, nor do I remember if any of my world
history teachers ever told us about the Battle of
Thermopylae, but the movie "300" is supposedly loosely based
on that battle, but more based on the Frank Miller’s graphic
novel. It’s a little after 500 B.C. and Xerxes (Rodrigo Santora) is leading the Persian Army all over the place,
creating a big ol’ empire, but then he runs into Greece. He
sends his ambassador to Sparta, but King Leonidas (Gerard
Butler) is having none of the "surrender" talk he is being
offered. And why would he – Spartans are bred from birth to
be the best warriors in the world. They are so dedicated to
their warriorness that if you are a scrawny baby you end up
tossed into a pit to die. But Leonidas is not scrawny, and
neither are his best Spartans, and he gathers up 300 of them
to take on the Persian Army at a place where the hundreds of
thousands of Persians mean nothing when they have to travel
through the Thermopylae pass.
After a sendoff every soldier should get by their wife on
the way to battle, Leonidas is off with his 300 troops to
fight the Persians, but his wife, Queen Gorgo (Lena Headey)
is left behind to keep things running in Sparta, and hoping
to convince the Sparta council to send more troops to help
her husband, even enlisting the help of the squirrelly
Theron (Dominic West).
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Back on the battlefield, Leonidas and his men are kicking
such major ass that Xerxes meets with Leonidas, offering the
King a butt-load of power in Xerxes’ empire, and yet again,
Leonidas will have none of it, goes back to his men, and
they continue to stab, decapitate, and pretty much destroy
the best of Xerxes’ Army. Like the famed battle, though,
there is a traitor in the Spartans midst, Xerxes finds a way
to gain the advantage, and Leonidas finds himself dead (hey,
I’m not giving anything away, it’s history dammit), but not
before dispatching one of his men back to Sparta to tell the
tale of the resolve of the 300, inspiring the rest of the
Spartans and the rest of Greece to stand up to Xerxes and
his army, and keep Greece from being taken over.
"300" is not for the kids, not for the squeamish, and not
for those who are appalled at seeing nudity or sex on the
screen. Yup, that’s right, Queen Gorgo knows how to send off
her man into battle, there’s this naked Oracle Girl, and the
violence is sometimes simple, but most of the time way
over-the-top and in slow motion. Heads come off, arms come
off, spears pierce right through torsos, but mixed with it
are some great speeches of going to battle. The movie does
have some slow moments, and seems longer than its hour and
forty-five minute running time, but for the most part, if
from the trailer, you think you might even be remotely
interesting in the movie, you probably won’t be
disappointed. It’s 4 stars out of 5 for "300," and this is
one I definitely recommend heading to the best theater you
can, with the giant screen and great sound, or better yet,
the IMAX experience is probably the ultimate way to see this
film, because seeing it in a theater with sticky floors and
questionable sound, well, I feel a little bit cheated.
That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!!
L8R!!! |
