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He's Just Not That Into You
Movie Stats & Links

Starring: Ginnifer Goodwin, Kevin Connolly, Scarlett Johansson, Bradley Cooper, Justin Long, Ben Affleck, Jennifer Aniston, Jennifer Connelly 
MPAA Rated: PG-13 
Released By: New Line Cinema
Web Site: hesjustnotthatintoyoumovie
Kiddie Movie: They will probably be bored, or hate men. 
Date Movie: Let her go with her gal-pals and then hate you when she comes home.
Gratuitous Sex: Scarlett Johansson almost shows herself naked. Almost. Damn.
Gratuitous Violence: Someone in the movie has seven years of bad luck coming.
Action: Nah.
Laughs: Some chuckles about relationships.
Memorable Scene: Why couldn't Scarlett bob out of the water about 10 more inches?
Memorable Quote: "I also have a magical name."
Directed By: Ken Kwapis
Produced By: Nancy Juvonen

He's Just Not
That Into You

A Movie Review

MPAA Rated - PG-13

It's 2:09 Long

A Review by
The Dude on the Right
As I was watching “He’s Just Not That Into You,” at first I was going to recommend to The Dude on the Left that he should take Trash to see the flick because it would get him out of ever having to ask for her hand in marriage.  Wouldn’t you know it?  By the end of the movie the tide turned and marriage was in the air.  Sorry for ruining part of the movie, but I guess the end message of this movie is that if you really love the one you’re with, well, you better get married, and pray to God that Scarlett Johansson doesn’t meet him in the quickie mart.

For most of you in the know about this movie, or just hearing about it, you vaguely remember a book some years back by the same title, “He’s Just Not That Into You.”  It’s based on a “Sex in the City” episode, and details explanations to women why the dude you just met won’t call you back, or the dude you’ve been dating for half-a-dozen years won’t pop the question.  So for over two hours you get bombarded with a movie that shows most of the women as shallow and pining for love, with a couple of dudes who cave into temptation, can’t get the woman they like, or can’t understand that they are actually the woman in the relationship.

And quite honestly, except for some of the “nice” Hollywood ending moments for this romantic comedy, it was really a depressing look at searching for, or keeping love.

I mean you get the one dude, Ben (Bradley Cooper), who is in a marriage that is having its problems (though the extent of them aren’t explained until later in the movie), who gets tempted by Anna (Scarlett Johansson), and who wouldn’t be tempted if your marriage seems to have lost its loving part and Scarlett Johannson hits on you?  Then you get Gigi (Ginnifer Goodwin).  She’s is the perfect model for the book, not comprehending, in any part of her head, why the guy doesn’t call her after the first date, thereby leading us to Alex (Justin Long) who is the guy who is sort of the narrator during the movie, explaining to Gigi the rules of dudes (Hey, Alex, thanks for breaking every rule of the guy-code!), and to no surprise, Gigi falls for Alex, and well, duh, it’s right back at her.  Oh, I forgot to mention that Ben is married to Janine (Jennifer Connelly), who happens to work with Gigi and Beth, oh yea, let’s get to Beth (Jennifer Aniston) who lives with Neil (Ben Affleck), he’s the anti-marriage guy, who is also friends with Ben, and oh yea, I forgot Conor (Kevin Connolly) who has the hots for Anna (and who wouldn’t?), and is also friends with Alex.  And then there is Mary (Drew Barrymore), who is friends with someone in the group of people, and also happens to be the ad executive for Conor, which of course leads to, well, Conor not turning gay, even though it does help him sell a lot of real estate.

Does that confuse you?  Well, it should, because “He’s Just Not Into You” did the totally wrong thing, at least for me, namely trying to explain some of the rules of why he’s not into you while also intertwining all of the characters, who somehow don’t really realize they are all interconnected.  Me, personally, I would have preferred a series of shorts on each subject, but you know what, even with that, I don’t think it would have helped this movie because for most of it I was thinking “God, in the end relationships all suck, no matter how you get into them, or how they end up,” and wondered, except for the Hollywood ending for a couple of the couples, if this movie will give dudes and dudettes alike the final reason to dump their current significant other in search of, well, Ben Affleck?

Yes, there were some cute lines, but until they made the movie happy, pretty much “He’s Just Not That Into You” will be having you totally question if you should be in the relationship you are in.  Some of the ladies in the theater seemed to have a great time during the movie, and I’m assuming they are single, but for the most part it was like well, what’s the point of getting into a relationship if, in the end, it just sucks, especially when dudes suck because, well, he met you at happy hour at a bar and won’t call you back, and well, she wants you to throw away your favorite pair of pants.  But you know what, sometimes that dude won’t call you back, and sometimes you have to throw away your pants.  Damn, love is confusing!  I just wish the movie didn’t suck so badly.

So, I didn’t really care for “He’s Just Not That Into You,” even though it had a lot of potential.  I hate to say it but part of the problem was this movie tried to show real relationships but had too many big, good-looking, names in it, i.e., I have a feeling every dude in a bad marriage will cheat on his wife with someone who looks like Scarlett Johansson.  The “real”-er people, like Kevin Connolly and Ginnifer Goodwin came across better in their roles, but I think the movie suffered from having too many “beautiful people,” and not just a slew of average people.  From my perspective it’s 1 star out of 5, and for some of the dudettes in the audience it seemed like a 4 star laugh riot.  I’ll average them together but knock off ½ star because seriously, did this movie need to be over two hours long?  It’s 2 stars out of 5 for “He’s Just Not That Into You.”

That’s it for this one!  I’m The Dude on the Right!!  L8R!!!

 

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