I Wasn’t Sure What to Blog About Until I Remembered that I, too, have been Pooped On.

By:

The Dude on the Right

I was debating what to blog about today.  I could get political, talking
about the repercussions of both Rudy Giuliani and John Edwards leaving the
Presidential race today.  I fully understood Rudy Giuliani’s exiting after
Florida, in a message to every political strategist to never ignore Iowa and New
Hampshire (although
I still don’t fully understand their influence
), but didn’t John Edwards,
just a week or so ago, say he was in it until the convention?  And with him
leaving the race why isn’t he endorsing anyone yet?  Could it be that
someone finally whispered in his ear saying "John, you’ve got no chance in hell
to win this thing.  Get out before "Super-Duper Tuesday" so you don’t muck
up the numbers and then we can start to see who the front-runner really is
because we don’t want to endorse the loser, do we?"

Then I was going to blog
about even at my being 40 years old, there is incredible hope for me to land a
hottie.  It was in a news blurb the other day when, and I don’t know how I
missed this news, that Ryan Reynolds is dating, though not engaged, to Scarlett
Johansson.  Most of you probably have no problem realizing who Ms.
Johansson is, namely the 23 year old gorgeous, perfect, woman, but I’m guessing
the name "Ryan Reynolds" doesn’t rank too high in your book of Hollywood celebs. 
Two words are simply in order for Ryan, and they are Van and Wilder. 
That’s right, he was Van Wilder in the movie with the same name.  As hope
for me, with eight years being the age difference, I did a quick check and it
looks like if I want to do the actress direction I should be dating the likes of
Angelina Jolie, Kate Winslet, Milla Jovovich, and if I wanted to find someone
more on the musical side, K.T. Tunstall seems like a fun dudette to hang with,
but how could I, in the end, deny Charlize Theron the man that is The Dude on
the Right?

But since politics can be an explosive subject, and with my
self-esteem not being able to handle the crushing blow of a rejection from
Charlize, I heard about a video on YouTube today that reminded me of days that I
was pooped on, literally.  One was when I was working in downtown Chicago,
for a camera store, and on a trip out for lunch I walked a little too close to
the buildings forgetting that along with crowding the sidewalks, sometimes the
pigeons like to hang out on the building ledges about five stories up. 
Walking along I suddenly caught a white blob, out of the corner of my eye, on my
shoulder, and sure enough, I was pooped on.  Then I recalled another time,
on the way to a Chicago Cubs’ game, when a shortcut to Murphy’s Bleachers from
the El-stop (that’s an elevated train for you non-Chicago folks) is down the
alley the El runs along, when suddenly I feel something plop in my hair. 
Luckily I had some napkins in my pockets to clean up the heavenly present. 
I have also previously done a
podcast on the terror that are Canadian Geese
, and mark my words, the
downfall of the United States might be by geese.  All of that said, I have
never done what this reporter did during his news report, but it leads to loads
of fun, at least for us watching.

Winged creatures might just be the death of us all!

That’s it for this one! 
I’m The Dude on the Right!!  L8R!!!